Vantage Point Counseling Services

New Years resolutions can set you up to take a self-esteem hit. Rather than mindlessly setting a goal, set up something for the entire year that is meaningful to you.

When we can reactive when we're triggered or stressed. This can cause damage that you can't take back. Rather than causing unnecessary damage, take your time and look inward.

The holidays can be tough. Whether you're in recovery or you're in a relationship that is struggling, the holidays can be difficult. Here are some considerations to help you recover from the stress.

Boundaries are difficult to define and even more difficult to apply. They're not always embraced by others.

Fixing a s*xual problem requires you to learn a lot about emotions, as well as a lot about s*x itself. Learn about your beliefs, history, and ideas and you'll be on your way to making changes. *xualproblem

The love languages can be an interesting tool, but they're often misused to overcompensate for other issues that are already existing in the relationship. Rather than relying on these, develop the skills that you need to enhance your relationship.

Treat Low S*xual Desire by Improving Your Quality of Life

S*x is sometimes an escape. However, it can also be a burden if you're not enjoying your life. Creating space for things you enjoy and learning about yourself and your emotions an help you increase your s*xual desire. *xualdesire https://loom.ly/ckk3Sfw

Treat Low S*xual Desire by Improving Your Quality of Life Treating low s*xual desire requires you to improve your quality of life. -- Vantage Point Counseling Services - Dallas, TX.

Remember that there is no substitute for hard work and the relationship that you build in therapy. Social media can have some interesting advice (some of it is bu****it), but it isn't therapy.

If you're feeling stuck, it can help to break up your problem into different categories. Think about your relationships, how you see yourself, and your career. It can be useful to identify underlying themes that overlap everything, but if you're looking to make changes, it's a good idea to focus on one area and make some small changes, then move to another area and do the same.

We are surrounded by images, ideas, and plots that impact us. Sadly we often don't even realize how these things impact us. Taking time to mindfully learn how these things can make you feel is the first step.

Commitment is crucial even when a relationship is feeling solid and stable. When it's not feeling as solid, it's natural that this commitment would wane some, but you want to put energy in ensuring you have enough of a commitment to examining your part in the relationship, identifying what needs to change, and what you are going to do to intervene with these things.

When you tell someone "no," it's normal for them to respond with some disappointment. The goal for you is to stay true to your own needs, without focusing too much attention on appeasing the other person's. Of course, this doesn't mean you shouldn't work with partners, etc. Instead, you just need to stay true to your boundaries and needs.

Holidays can make us feel like we're abnormal and unworthy when we're not feeling like traditions say we "should." It's time to let some of those things go and respecting your true feelings. You're not alone because so many others have these feelings too. Let's welcome them rather than deny them.

The holidays can test our boundaries with others and our self-acceptance like no other time. Embrace how you feel and have boundaries around what you want.

Trust is not a double negative! It's more than a lack of lies and abuse. What small gestures help you trust that you can open up and be authentic?

If you have a long term goal, you may find that you've been stuck for a long time and you can figure out why. People can really get frustrated with themselves. In order to make a change, you need to focus on daily actions that can get you there. This will involve a plan. Take a first step and appreciate small achievements.

As we get older, we often lose touch with our creative selves. Learning new things and embracing our creativity helps us learn about ourselves and share those parts of ourselves with others. Continue learning about yourself!

Feelings are overemphasized as a way of making goals for yourself. Rather than trying to rid yourself of difficult feelings (it'll never happen), it's better to identify what is meaningful to you.

Therapy is a lot of work. Although there is a lot of therapist expert advice out there, therapy itself is a place for you to establish goals for yourself and make lasting changes. This is difficult and usually means that you have to do a lot of introspection, while challenging yourself.

It's understandable to waiver on whether or not you should leave a relationship. Especially if this relationship has been one that is long term. Expectations about relationship changes need to be based firmly in reality. It's also important to recognize you can leave if you want to. I know it's stigmatized, but walking away isn't bad.

What to Talk About Before Getting Married

A great article from our very own Caroline Rucker. Check it out!

What to Talk About Before Getting Married What to talk about before getting married. -- Vantage Point Counseling Services - Dallas, TX.

The best way to get people to show up and support you is practicing showing up for others. Practice offering support to those in your life and see how your relationship grows.

The Love Languages are extremely popular, but they often are used as weaponry for couples who struggle with other issues. Focus on your issues and identify interventions that can help with those before using tools like the love languages to help.

S*x can be a place of fun, connection, vulnerability, intensity, etc. How can you lean into those edges and enjoy more connection with your partner(s)?

It's understandable to strive for happiness. It feels good! However, it's not a great life goal. You just can't be and won't be happy all of the time. If you cling to closely to this goal, you'll likely add even more stress and self-deprecation to your life. Instead, focus on living a meaningful and valuable life. Identify what that would be for you.

Control isn't a terrible thing. It can help us recognize where we need to stay out of dangerous situations or problematic people. It can also help us identify what we should without and what we should share. However, it's a bit of a balancing act that has 2 extremes. On one end, you can be in control of every perception that others have about you. Or you can try to control others. So here's to working on that balancing act.

When you're dealing with a conflict, it's easy to focus on the details of the problem. This usually leads to endless arguing with no resolution. Start by listening and understanding and then work your way to looking at your options together.

Talking about non-monogamy is often more delicate in our culture than it needs to be. If it brings up insecurities in your relationship, it's fine, but those need to be discussed and supported. Think of how you can have these conversations and then focus on what you can agree upon after you have the conversation.

P**n and s*x addictions are so controversial that they can leave you feeling confused about the help that you need. Here is a general rule that I recommend so that you can find someone who helps you look inward rather than a therapist who is interested solely on their own baggage around issues of s*x, ego, and religion. *xaddiction

Complex trauma can stop you in your tracks, push you to get reactive, and prevent you from reaching your goals. Follow these steps to take care of yourself and make decisions when you're feeling triggered.

We're taught so much stuff about our bodies and the bodies of others. Many of these things sadly prevent us from s*xually connecting, more than they promote s*xual connection. There are ways to reshape how we approach ourselves and how we view others. *xualissues *xualdysfunction *xtherapy *xualconnection

Men are taught s*xual scripts that can often lead to rigidity. However, if you can let some of these go, you'll find a freedom that can help you connect and enhance your relationship like never before. *xuality *xuality

Change and comfort rarely cooccur. To make a change means getting a little scared, taking risks, and being unsure of the outcome. Take mindful risks and see what happens.

Making changes in your life requires you to take risks. Of course risks can be careless and self-destructive, but they don't have to be. When you take mindful risks, you're still not sure how it will work out. However, you can build deeper connections and find joy that you're currently missing out on.

You can fall for BS traps when you're trying to treat low s*xual desire. You need to really focus on enhancing your overall quality of life, by enhancing your relationships and treating old wounds. Focus on your identifying your root causes, rather than finding a quick fix. https://loom.ly/77pIgwA *xualissues *xualdysfunction *xtherapy *xualdesire

Partners, especially women partners, are often blamed for their partners' cheating. On one end, cheating is usually just a bad decision. Other times it's more of a chronic issue. Either way, you aren't responsible for your partners decisions. Of course if you heal, you can have enough trust and respect to share what was going on at the time of the cheating. At the same time, you're primary obligation is to take care of yourself.

The love languages are lazy, useless, culturally incompetent and ignorant. Sadly, therapists use this book all-too-often as "bibliotherapy." This book, in my experience leads to more resentment as it makes it seem like things should be easy when they aren't. Embrace complexities and learn how to talk about them and your relationship is more likely to improve. Or hell, walk away if you want to. You don't have to remain in any relationship. But don't fall for this garbage if you're wanting true help.

If you're suspicious that you're being cheated on, it can be a struggle to know what to do. Taking care of yourself and your boundaries is critical.

If only you could just be happy? Right? Well not exactly. If you only feel happiness, you're going to miss out on some beautiful things in your life. Connections, changes, and personal growth often come out of painful experiences and emotions such as grief, sadness, and anxiety come with pain. Learn about these emotions, how they feel in your body, and enjoy the growth that happens.

All or nothing thinking can create 2 extremes. On one side, you've reached your goal. On the other side is failure. Identify what is in the middle and you'll be shocked at how it will help you. *xualissues *xualdysfunction *xtherapy