Miki Johnston, Lcsw-S

Who inspires you? What is a quality or trait in someone you admire?

Admiration 🚫🟰Jealousy

CHALLENGE:
Tag in the comments a person(s) that inspires you along with the quality/trait you admire in them.

I’ll go first… I admire your passion and perseverance to make things happen in your career!

Now it’s your turn… ☀️

Who inspires you? What is a quality or trait in someone you admire?

Admiration 🚫🟰Jealousy

CHALLENGE:
Tag in the comments a person(s) that inspires you along with the quality/trait you admire in them.

I’ll go first… I admire your passion and perseverance to make things happen in your career!

Now it’s your turn… ☀️

Get out of your calendar! Please visit my website for a list of topics to inspire and educate your parents, educators, students and community groups. Look forward to talking soon.

Say YES to vitamin N!!

This video is a must watch for parents with children of all ages. (Link below)

No is one of the most important word in a parent’s vocabulary. And often under/misused. Regardless of the age of your child, saying no doesn’t have to be rigid or mean. No offers structure and safety, which are things every child needs to feel.

They need to know you’re in charge and that you are guiding them to be able to make decisions and do what is best and right.

No fosters resilience, and teaches children how to set and respect boundaries for themselves and others.

No can be hard for parents who want to avoid conflict and the kind of opposition we often experience when we don’t “give them their way”.

We are disillusioned when we think that no diffuses conflict. What it does is avoid conflict and that’s the wrong message to send our children.

No means, “yes, I love you” which is an authoritarian parenting stance that helps our children become more self-reliant, confident and and resilient. Isn’t that what we want?

SAY YES TO NO!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3cgUhtRUbE

If you want someone to hear your point of view, yelling at them is not going to make that happen.

Whether it’s a political discussion, sharing a social ideology or trying to get our children to do some thing tone of voice matters.

If you want someone to hear your point of view, yelling at them is not going to make that happen.

Whether it’s a political discussion, sharing a social ideology or trying to get our children to do some thing tone of voice matters.

Shout out to all moms out there who are launching their kids this fall. You’ve been preparing them for this their whole lives. So many mixed emotions. Let them know that you believe in them by letting them go to spread their wings. You’ll always be their mom.

Now it’s time to take care of you.

When we grovel it’s our anxious attachment system saying, validate me, pick me, don’t abandon me. It’s a power and control dynamic.

We have all made our fair share of mistakes that call us to apologize or ask for forgiveness (🙋🏻‍♀️). This is different than groveling.

Next time before you grovel ask yourself, “why do I so desperately seek this person’s approval and acceptance.” The answer lies within.

Let’s do this! 🎤 www.mikijohnstontherapy.com

As human beings we all have a full range of emotions. There are no such thing as good feelings and bad feelings.

Approachable parent tip: Learn to tolerate all of what your children feel. Teach them how to express their emotions in a healthy way and accept whatever emotion shows up.

When we admonish or shame our kids for showing certain emotions they will learn to hide those feelings.
This can manifest in anxiety, people pleasing, unhealthy attachment with their friends and future partners and a quest for perfectionism.

Be an approachable parent. let them know you love them as they are. You’re their greatest role model.

You don’t want to miss this!We’re going to have a great conversation about our parenting styles and how they can help and hinder success and resilience in our children at every age!

Even for confident extroverts there are times when it’s hard to find the courage to say what’s on our mind.

Maybe it has to do with the person we’re talking to, the issues being addressed, the situation or circumstances we’re in or simply our fear of the outcome. Maybe we are avoiding the inevitable…

Try to calm the anxious part of your brain that is anticipating the outcome before the conversation has even happened.

We need to remember that we can control the words and tone we choose but we can’t control the reaction or response that another will have to those words.

Dalai Lama says, “silence is sometimes the best answer.”

In a healthy relationship or friendship that is meant to endure, the time will present itself for having difficult conversations in a compassionate and honest way.

There were so many students that approached me after the presentation to let me know how much they appreciated the message about toxic relationships. Love these students! One of the takeaways is that just because some of the red flags are common in our relationships doesn’t mean they’re ok. Ditch the jealousy and possessiveness for acceptance, mutual consent, and respect.

Loved speaking to the NCL Park Cities chapter yesterday on friends and frenemies! Great group of 8th and 10th grade girls.

I paired up the 10th grade girls to mentor the 8th graders. They had so much wisdom to share.

🚩

Walking away is easier said than done. It’s a process. It takes courage to leave and even more courage to look at why are you stay. Take all the time you need. Try and keep your dignity intact.

I hope you’ll join me for this free community wide event!! It’s free and open to the public. What could be better?

Thank you for your sponsorship and support.

Registration link is in my bio.

This can be hard to accept but your friend’s response to their anxiety is not about you. Their struggle is real.

Anxiety can be hard to understand and recognize even in our closest friends.

Whether it’s during the holiday season or anytime, social events can be very overwhelming to people struggling with anxiety. It can look like last minute cancellations, not returning calls or texts, arriving late or leaving early, or having a hard time following or remembering conversations. They’re not doing these things on purpose or to be selfish.

The best thing to do when you see these patterns in a friend is to show them patience and grace. Remind them that you’re there for them, that you understand that they are doing what’s best for them and give them space and don’t pressure them to keep “plans“. And…don’t judge!

What might help you most is to shift your expectations around their ability to reciprocate.

Most importantly, show compassion and don’t take it personally.

This quote comes from a NYT article published on December 7th.

One of the things I hear most often from parents with teens struggling with depression or anxiety, is that they didn’t see it coming. They didn’t know the signs.

This isn’t about blame or shame. We only know what we know. I am grateful to all the parents who show up in my office at any point during their child’s mental health crisis to say “we need help”.

Learning the signs of anxiety, depression and suicidality can save a life. Maybe even the life of our own child.

Join me on February 1 at the YMCA on Preston Rd. Dallas for an honest communitywide conversation about knowing the signs and how to help teens struggling with mental health issues.

Article: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/12/07/science/pandemic-adolescents-depression-anxiety.html

We all have expectations. When we adjust them that doesn’t mean that we lower them it means that we try and be more realistic.

Our expectations of ourselves and others, especially during the holiday season are usually at an all time high!

Our families, ourselves and society put apply pressure to be jolly, get it all done, give the perfect gift, make the perfect meal create the perfect craft and expect everyone can get along. But we are only human.

Go easy on yourself and others. When we try and control every situation and every interaction he can feel all anxiety, disappointment and even resentment.

When her expectations are realistic we are more likely to enjoy each moment and the people around us.

Establishing and enforcing boundaries are some of the most challenging things we need to do in our relationships.

What’s harder for you, drawing the boundary or keeping it?

You can’t change their behavior but you can change your response.

Practice not perfection.

Change is a process. But you can ONLY change yourself. Notice what you want to change and just take the first step. Be patient with yourself. You’ll get there. *tgo

Yes, we’re all busy. Yet sometimes our busyness is a tactic to avoid what we feel. What is your busyness about?

Are you sure you’re sharing some thing with someone that they want to know or that you want them to know? Be compassionate and constructive with your criticism.

Conflict is a natural part of all relationships.

How we choose to handle our disagreements can deeply affect the health and stability of our relationships.

Communication styles are learned at an early age and typically develop from what is modeled to us.

The irony of conflict avoidance, is that it creates more conflict and leaves us feeling anxious and unsettled.

Do you Gunnysack? Holding in your thoughts and feelings will only lead to an explosion later.

When we finally explode these bottled up frustrations often get projected onto somebody other than the person you originally had the disagreement with.

No fun.

Mothers naturally dream about who their daughters will become, but the greatest gift we can give our girls is to accept them for who they are. That’s unconditional love.

The signs of someone who is considering su***de are:

*Talking about wanting to die or to kill oneself
*Looking for a way to kill oneself (access to weapons and medications)
*Talking about feeling hopeless or having no purpose
*Talking about feeling trapped or being in unbearable pain
*Talking about being a burden to others
*Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs
*Acting anxious, agitated, or reckless
*Sleeping too little or too much
*Withdrawing or feeling isolated
*Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge
*Displaying extreme mood swings

If you’re concerned or see any of these signs, please speak up and SAVE A LIFE
***deprevention ***deawarenessmonth

Pretending that everything is ok when it’s not breeds anxiety. Being able to notice and admit when you’re struggling is the first step to feeling better.

Pretending that everything is ok when it’s not breeds anxiety. The ability to recognize and admit when you’re not doing well is the first step to feeling better.

It’s not about winning the argument it’s about learning to have a conversation in a way that doesn’t alienate others who have different viewpoints than your own.

Speak calmly and don’t try and change the other person’s mind. Listen without trying to formulate your response.

You might be surprised to learn something.

The only real way to influence the change process is to look at our part in why we’re stuck and begin to do something’s differently.

When we sit in judgment we show our own insecurities. It says more about who the judge is and less about the judged.

If you want things to change, you need to make different choices. Push through the fear and try something new. You got this.

We’re asking the wrong questions after a Dallas-area murder-su***de left 6 dead. Here’s why that must change

Good article.

We’re asking the wrong questions after a Dallas-area murder-su***de left 6 dead. Here’s why that must change Too many reactions to this month’s murder-su***de of an Allen family of six -- set in motion by the 19-year-old son’s belief that death was his only option -...

So excited about being back in person.🤞 Call or email me to schedule your next parent, student, business or community presentation. Click the link in my bio to visit my website and see all my topics. Can’t wait to hear from you!

When you have a neurotypical child, you feel reasonably assured that class participation and decent study habits will result in good grades. These kids have close friends. They get invited to participate in social things like dances and weekend gatherings. They make the teams, auditions, organizations and clubs.

But when you have a child with certain differences, this is often not the case. Learning may take longer, both academically and socially. Despite their tremendous efforts, results are often a fraction of their peers and social acceptance is fleeting, setting them up for painful comparisons and bitter frustration. Instead of a fun and fulfilling experience, school can become a breeding ground for depression and anxiety, and assignments a battle ground at home. It is exhausting for parent and child alike.

This is the week of SPED (Special Education), Autism, Dyslexia, and ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) awareness.

For all the children who struggle every day to succeed in a world that does not recognize their gifts and talents, and for those who are walking beside them, please let this be a gentle reminder to be kind and accepting of ALL people.

Recognize that the "playing field" is not always a level surface.

Children who learn differently are not weird. They are merely gifted in ways that our society does not value enough. Yet they want what everyone else wants: To be accepted!!

In honor of all children who are deemed "different".
Our world would be far less beautiful without them.
*Author Unknown*