12/10/2025
So many people suffer the effects of gaslighting, but have no idea that it is happening to them. They have never heard of Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome, though if they looked it up, they would find themselves in its description. Many people end up on my reiki table as a result of this sort of abuse, so let’s talk about it. Does any of this sound familiar to any of you?
🚫 The Whisper of Abuse: Recognizing the Language of Gaslighting
Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse where the abuser, (often linked to narcissistic behavior) systematically manipulates the victim into questioning their own memory, sanity, and perception of reality. It is designed to create confusion, undermine confidence, and make the victim dependent on the abuser’s version of the truth.
If you are suffering the effects of narcissistic abuse syndrome (NAS), recognizing these phrases is the critical first step toward healing. Your feelings are valid, and what you experienced was real.
👂 What Gaslighting Sounds Like: 10 Phrases to Watch For.
The language of gaslighting aims to distort your reality. Here are the specific tactics and words used to make you doubt yourself:
I. Dismissing Your Feelings (Invalidation)
These phrases minimize your emotional reactions, suggesting they are unreasonable or excessive:
• "You're too sensitive."
• (Used to deflect responsibility for their hurtful actions.)
• "Why are you always so dramatic?"
• (Implies your strong emotion is an unreasonable overreaction to “nothing.")
• "You need to calm down."
• (A command used to instantly neutralize your distress without addressing the root cause.)
• "You're making a big deal out of nothing."
• (Suggests the problem you raised is trivial, making you feel foolish for bringing it up.)
II. Denying and Rewriting Reality (Memory Manipulation)
These phrases directly challenge your memory of past events, leaving you confused and questioning your own mind:
• "That never happened."
• (The abuser denies an event took place, even when you clearly remember it.)
• "You must be misremembering."
• (Suggests your memory is flawed rather than their actions being accountable.)
• "I already told you..."
• (Used to assert that the opposite of what you recall was said, making you believe your mind is failing you.)
III. Shifting Blame (Projection)
These phrases turn the abuse back onto the victim, making you feel responsible for the abuser's poor behavior:
• "You made me do/say that."
• (Removes accountability by framing their action as a reaction to your supposed fault.)
• "You're the one with the real anger problem/issue."
• (This is projection—they accuse you of the negative trait they actually possess.)
• "You're crazy. You need help."
• (The ultimate dismissal, designed to undermine your sanity.)
🧭 Finding the Path to Healing:
If you hear these phrases regularly, they are not a reflection of who you are, but a clear sign of emotional abuse.
Recognizing this language is the first, brave step toward recovery. Help is available, and you deserve to heal and reclaim your truth.
• Foundation: Professional Therapy
A qualified therapist specializing in trauma or narcissistic abuse is essential. They provide the objective, safe space needed to re-ground your reality and rebuild your self-esteem.
• Support: Complementary Healing (Reiki)
Support your emotional recovery with gentle modalities like Reiki healing. It can assist in releasing the energetic and emotional residue left by sustained abuse, calming a hyper-vigilant nervous system, and restoring your sense of inner peace and self-worth.
💜 Resources for Help (Confidential & Immediate)
If you are in danger, please call 911 immediately.
For confidential support, resources, and
National Domestic Violence Hotline: Available 24/7. Advocates offer support, crisis intervention, and referrals for all types of relationship abuse.
Call: 1-800-799-SAFE
♥️🙌🏼♥️ THVT
