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The Marvil family has been giving families personalized care in their time of need for six generations. Most of us are not prepared to plan and carry out a funeral ceremony for someone we love. So much of the information available on this critically important subject fails to focus on what is most important; having a personalized, meaningful funeral that helps families and friends begin the healing process of mourning after the death of someone we love. Our funeral home's dedicated staff wants to help you and can play a critical role in planning and carrying out a meaningful funeral or memorial service.
Operating as usual
[02/26/19] In natural burial, the body is buried, without embalming, in a natural setting. Any shroud or casket that is used is biodegradable, nontoxic, and made out of sustainable material. Instead, of traditional headstones, flat rocks, plants or trees may serve as grave markers.
[02/21/19] One of the reasons for investing in a preneed funeral plan is that it relieves you or your loved ones of a tremendous burden in the event of a death. It is very difficult to maintain a clear head when someone passes; pre-arrangement means everything is already in place.
[02/19/19] If the deceased wished to donate their organs, a funeral home can often work with you to provide a viewing or service and assist in the transport of the body.
[02/14/19] As a family member of the deceased, you are within your rights to specify who can attend the visitation or viewing, funeral service, and burial. If you would prefer one or more of these be restricted to family only, let your funeral director know and he or she will help you make this known.
[02/12/19] A traditional funeral service usually consists of three separate rites: the visitation, the service, and the committal. Each of these is a separate and distinct funeral rite, and allows you to grieve, celebrate the life of the deceased, and say goodbye.
[02/07/19] Funeral homes have the facilities to be able to handle virtually any type of service. If music is needed, or a setup for a choir or group of musicians, the funeral home has both the room and the equipment to accommodate virtually any request.
[02/05/19] Making Jewish funeral arrangements are similar to other funeral arrangements in the fact that all the same information is necessary. You'll need to meet with a rabbi and funeral director to determine the type of service you'd like for your loved one.
[01/31/19] We realize that the idea of pre-planning your own funeral can certainly seem morbid—especially when you’re the very picture of health. Let’s talk about the financial and emotional benefits your loved ones will experience as a result of your thinking of things advance.
[01/29/19] It’s important to remember that there are many different customs for after the burial that have been practiced over the years. If you aren’t sure what’s most appropriate, you may wish to speak with your rabbi.
[01/24/19] After a death, “firsts” are difficult – first birthday, anniversary, holiday, etc. If you were close to the family of the deceased, sending a remembrance on one of these dates will be greatly appreciated and bring great comfort to the family.
[01/22/19] More and more people are choosing to personalize funeral services with additions that are meaningful for the deceased and the mourners (such as a song or poem from a good friend or family member). The funeral director can help plan the ceremony, so these additions are seamlessly added.
[01/17/19] The week following the Jewish funeral service is known as the Shiva period. During this time, friends and family will gather to offer comfort to those grieving their loss.
[01/15/19] Planning funerals in advance allows individuals to plan a memorable funeral service that reflects their wishes. With advance planning, families can plan celebrations of life as unique as the individual being remembered.
The Grieving Need You Most After the Funeral
JANUARY 5, 2017 / JOHN PAVLOVITZ
My father died suddenly while on vacation three years ago. The event rattled the bedrock of my life in ways that are difficult to describe, and taught me lessons I couldn’t have learned any other way.
One of the truths I discovered, is that when you lose someone you love—people show up.
Almost immediately they surround you with social media condolences and texts and visits and meals and flowers. They come with good hearts, with genuine compassion, and they truly want to support you in those moments. The problem, is that you’re neither prepared nor particularly helped by the volume then.
The early days of grief are a hazy, dizzying, moment by moment response to a trauma that your mind simply can’t wrap itself around. You are, what I like to call a Grief Zombie; outwardly moving but barely there. You aren’t really functioning normally by any reasonable measurement, and so that huge crush of people is like diverting thousands of cars into a one lane back road—it all overwhelms the system. You can’t absorb it all. Often it actually hurts.
This usually happens until the day of the funeral, when almost immediately the flood of support begins to subside. Over the coming days the calls and visits gradually become less frequent as people begin to return to their normal lives already in progress—right about the time the bottom drops out for you.
Just as the shock begins to wear off and the haze is lifted and you start to feel the full gravity of the loss; just as you get a clear look at the massive crater in your heart—you find yourself alone.
People don’t leave you because they’re callous or unconcerned, they’re just unaware. Most people understand grief as an event, not as the permanent alteration to life that it is, and so they stay up until the funeral and imagine that when the service ends, that somehow you too can move ahead; that there is some finishing to your mourning.
That’s the thing about grief that you learn as you grieve: that it has no shelf life; that you will grieve as long as you breathe, which is far after the memorial service and long after most people are prepared to stay. Again, they still love you dearly, they just have their own roads to walk.
Sometimes people leave because they suddenly feel estranged by the death. They may have been used to knowing you as part of a couple or as a family, and they aren’t able to navigate the new dynamic the loss has created. They simply don’t know how to relate to you the way they once did, and so they withdraw.
Or sometimes people see you from a distance and mistake your visible stability for the absence of need, as if the fact that you’re functioning in public doesn’t mean you don’t fall apart all the time when you’re alone—and you do. We all carry the grief as bravely and competently as we can in public, but none of us are strong enough to shoulder it alone. People often say of a grieving person, “They’re so strong”, but they’re not. They’re doing what they have to in order to survive. They need you to come alongside them.
Other times people avoid you because they believe that they will say the wrong thing; that somehow they will remind you of your loved one and cause you unnecessary pain. Trust me, the grieving don’t lack for reminders. They are intimately aware of the absence in their lives, and you acknowledging it actually makes them feel better. It gives them consent to live with the grief, and to know that they can be both wounded and normal.
Friends, what I’m saying, is that it’s wonderful to be present for people when tragedy occurs. It’s a beautiful thing to express your love and support for those you love in any way you feel is right in those first few days. It does matter. No compassion is ever wasted.
But if there’s anything I would tell you, as someone who’s walked through the Grief Valley, is that the time your presence is most needed and most powerful, is in those days and weeks and months and years after the funeral; when most people have withdrawn and the road is most isolating. It is in the countless ordinary moments that follow, when grief sucker punches you and you again feel it all fully.
It’s been five years since I lost my father, and on many days the pain is as present and profound as that first day.
Remind yourself to reach out to people long after the services and memorials have concluded.
Death is a date in the calendar, but grief is the calendar
marvilfuneralhome.com Kelly Anne Wiseley, age 35, of Glenolden, was taken tragically January 2, 2019. Born and raised in Philadelphia, she was a graduate of West Catholic High School and she received her Bachelors degree from Neumann University. Kelly worked as a bartender at Harrahs Casino in Chester for the last 12
[01/03/19] Regular furnace inspections are an important part of HVAC maintenance. Here, the thermostat is inspected for proper operation, the filter is inspected and changed or cleaned, all electrical components and controls are checked, and the motor is oiled as needed.
[01/01/19] Traditional Jewish funerals do not allow viewing of the deceased, as it is considered disrespectful to look at a person who is unable to look back. Therefore, a closed casket is customary at a Jewish funeral.
[12/27/18] It’s important to remember that asking your loved ones not to hold a funeral service after you’re gone could actually prolong their grieving process. Instead, you may want to consider making your own pre-arrangements, so that you can omit those funeral elements you don’t want.
[12/25/18] One of the most important things that pre-planning your funeral can provide is peace of mind. Your loved ones will have peace of mind when they are grieving, and you will have peace of mind from knowing that they’re taken care of.
[12/20/18] Well into the late 1970s, it was common for hearses to be used as ambulances in addition to their funeral duties in rural areas.
[12/18/18] According to Jewish funeral custom, the deceased is buried wearing a simple white shroud, known as a Tachrichim, to avoid distinguishing between rich and poor classes. Men are buried with their prayer shawls (tallism), which are made unusable by cutting off one of the fringes.
[12/13/18] Many funerals will bring family and friends from all over the country, which means they will need some place to stay. A funeral home professional will be able to recommend local hotels to mourners, so you won’t have to worry about them while you’re grieving.
[12/11/18] In what state is the largest U.S. cemetery located? If you guessed New York, you're right. Calvary Cemetery in Queens currently has the largest number of burials at 3 million.
[12/06/18] At a time of loss, it’s not uncommon to struggle for words. In an article on comforting the bereaved, Rabbi Maurice Lamm observes, “Probably the most consoling words I have ever heard are these: ‘Tell me what your love one was really like.’”
[12/04/18] Have you noticed that bereavement sometimes leads to awkward moments between grievers and their friends? If you struggle to find comforting things to say to your grieving friend, remember that a hug often speaks louder (and more effectively) than words.
Did you know that if you text 741741 when you are feeling depressed or suicidal, a crisis worker will text you back immediately and continue to text with you? Many people don’t like talking on the phone and would be more comfortable texting. It's a FREE service to ANYONE - teens, adults, etc. - who lives in the U.S. It's run by The Crisis Text Line.
You. Matter. #youmattertous
We invite our FB friends to join us in raising awareness for Mental illness.
[11/29/18] Thankfully, the death of a loved one close to you isn’t something that happens very often, but that means many have no idea what to do. A funeral home professional knows exactly what needs to be done, and will be able to guide you through the process.
[11/27/18] Don’t be afraid to ask for help in making decisions about funeral arrangements. The help of a trusted friend or family member of the deceased can be an invaluable support at a difficult time. It’s best, however, to keep the number to just one or two helpers so decisions aren’t prolonged.
[11/22/18] In Jewish traditions, the deceased are buried as soon as possible after an honoring ceremony called k'vod hamet. Waiting any longer is considered a humiliation of the dead.
[11/20/18] If your loved one had very specific instructions regarding the type of funeral service he or she wanted, it’s important to honor those wishes as best as possible. We’re always here to help you ensure your service is as close to his or her wishes as possible.
[11/15/18] The grieving process is hard. With strong history of understanding and experience, we understand that a simple funeral process can make your time just a little bit easier. Grieve with people who understand your humanity.
[11/13/18] Funeral directors and directors of mortuaries provide an important human and community service. During their training, they are prepared for work that offers not only intellectual and emotional challenge, but also the satisfaction of helping individuals and families through the grieving process.
[11/08/18] Tests conducted in the remarkably intact furnace and heating system built under the Roman Baths of Constantine indicated the floors could be heated to temperatures between 77 and 95 degrees Fahrenheit. It consumed 300 pounds of wood per hour, and took two days to preheat the system.
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