01/21/2026
“Good feelings… are there any bad ones?”
Short answer: no!
There are no bad feelings.
Feelings aren’t moral. They aren’t right or wrong, good or bad. They’re information.
Emotions are the neutral *segway* between our automatic thoughts and our actions.
Something happens → a thought fires → a feeling shows up → then we act.
(Although we can have a somatic feeling and create meaning from that as well, but I digress! 🙂↕️)
So here's what that means for you and me:
Anger doesn’t ruin relationships.
Fear doesn’t make you weak.
Sadness isn’t a failure.
Even jealousy, resentment, or rage are signals—not character flaws.
What *does* cause harm is what we sometimes do while trying to maneuver through these feelings and sensations.
When we judge or suppress emotions, and/or tend to live a fairly unexamined life, feeling-laced-behaviors tend to come out sideways—through snapping, shutting down, numbing, overworking, self-criticism, and a whole gamut of things we've all seen or heard about. But when we slow down and listen, feelings can actually guide us toward clarity and choice.
We need curiosity, awareness, compassion, and accountability between some of those quick progressions to start making a change.
A helpful reframe:
* Thoughts tell a story
* Feelings signal meaning
* Actions are where responsibility lives
You don’t need to get rid of your feelings.
You need to understand their backstory.
In therapy, we don’t label emotions as “good” or “bad.”
We ask: What is this feeling trying to protect? What does it need? What choice do I want to make next?
Because awareness creates options.
And options can create change, if you want them 🩷.
