Denise Funfar

06/06/2023

Please excuse my lack of Instagram knowhow 😅😂 and check out my new website at www.DeniseFunfar.com

I’d love your feedback. In addition to my coaching and group offerings, I share my story in the “About” tab. I hope you may consider reading it.

I work at the intersections of coaching, consciousness (spirituality), and healing.

I help you address unconscious limiting conditioning and beliefs of the past and befriend yourself in the present, yet the focus is always on proactive forward momentum toward your desired future. Without all three, true transformation often eludes us.

05/30/2023

I appreciated this post from so much that I wanted to share it with all of you.

She writes: “When we truly care for ourselves, the question “What do I need?” becomes woven into the fabric of our lives.

The type of work we do and how we spend our free time is integrated with what we care about: the environment, music, learning, diversity, spirituality, health.

It becomes our approach to daily life, rather than a goal to be achieved in the distant future. This allows us to effectively participate in and influence our lives.”

04/27/2023

Looking at younger me from an outsider's perspective, you wouldn't have know the pain I felt. I made sure to be the captain, the social chair, etc.

The truth is that everyone has times when they feel lonely. It is often due to changed circumstances or making lifestyle changes.

Beyond circumstances, we may try so hard to fit in that we lose sight of actual belonging, which requires us to be vulnerable to be accepted for who we truly are.

My experience in childhood was a mix of both. I got so good at trying to fit in between the moves, changing cultural norms, and perceived expectations that my number one goal wasn’t to share about my authentic self, but to just not get found out as the inadequate person I thought I was.

My external conditions and possibilities changed rapidly, but my internal feeling of not belonging as my authentic self took much longer to shift, becoming a reoccurring theme as I continued to change countries and societal norms as an adult.

The major difference now is that I experience the feeling of belonging. Belonging comes from the inside out, just as much as the outside in.

Sometimes when we have experienced conditioning of not belonging, the belief can hold on and become recreated in our external circumstances even after the perceived or real threat is gone. We may even find ourselves feeling lonely as our norm. This is when it can be a good idea to get professional help.
If you have a challenging pattern around belonging, integrative coaching, and especially self-compassion work, can be a beautiful part of a healing strategy.

I invite you to check out the links in my bio to download the “I am Worth Meditation” or book a discover call to learn more.

*I recognize that discrimination and bullying are very real and that this post only addresses one part of loneliness.
If you are in need of help, one resource is texting HOME to 741741 to speak with a Crisis Counselor.

04/25/2023

I just sent out an email to everyone subscribed to the email list.
Not already on the email list?
Here is the link to receive updates about programs, coaching and events: https://denise-funfar.mykajabi.com/IamWorthy

You will also receive a guided meditation when you sign up!

"I am Worthy" Guided Meditation is a powerful tool to help you connect with your inner worthiness and promote feelings of self-love and compassion.

04/18/2023

I had a mindfulness mentor tell me once, if you’re feeling stressed, move your body and drink lots of water.

Solid advice!

Walking on it’s own is incredible for our health and wellbeing. If we can get out in nature, even better!

Something you may not know is that we can also use walking as our meditation. Just as you may sit down and focus on your breath, you can focus on your body moving or the sensations under your feet.

This is so helpful, especially when our minds are full and sitting down to meditate is not accessible.

I have a meditation channel on if you want to check out some guided walking meditations to ease the process.

Meditation channel:

https://www.aurahealth.io/guestpass/denise-funfar

04/14/2023

✨One of my goals is to normalize and usher in new possibilities of healing and thriving that reach beyond the modern medical model.

✨Integrative coaching combines both traditional coaching and a diverse range of mindfulness, energy psychology, somatic practices and healing modalities in the areas of mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wellness to make positive changes in all areas of life.

✨There are a lot of holistic or alternative methods that have not yet made their way into modern society that are very effective for thriving and healing.


—

04/13/2023

Tonight is the Parenting workshop Nurture the Nurturer. It’s not too late
To join!

A reminder for your Friday night. Be gentle with yourself.

If you struggle with this, you are not alone. Join me and Denise Funfar for Nurturing the Nurturer in April. Learn more here: www.becomingpeaceful.com/events

**I would love to know and credit this artist if anyone knows!**

04/11/2023

Self-Compassion is linked to positive states like happiness and wellbeing as well as a reduction in negative states such as depression and anxiety, without decreasing our motivation or ability to get things done.

3 workshops/courses on Self-Compassion:

💛THIS THURSDAY:
Nurture the Nurturer with Becoming Peaceful - Certified Peaceful Parenting Coach
ONLINE WORKSHOP Thursday, April 13, 6:30pm-8:30pm on ZOOM

💛6-Week Short Course of Mindful Self-Compassion for Women
IN PERSON in Encinitas on Friday mornings 10am-11:30am PST, April 21st - June 2nd (no class on May 5th)

💛8-Week Mindful Self-Compassion LIVE ONLINE
LIVE ONLINE Tuesdays from 5pm -8pm PST, April 18-June 6th (half-day retreat on Saturday, May 20th 9am-1pm)

Learn more and sign up at: https://www.denisefunfar.com/self-compassion

04/10/2023

Self-doubt can be a habit that is hard to break.

Your mind may question your ability.

You may be afraid that:

• you cannot perform well enough
• that you are not skilled or experienced enough or
• that you do not have enough value to offer

These are nothing more than wounded beliefs about your self-worth.

It is time to recognize these thoughts as woundings and not empower them as truth anymore.

Here are a few things to try when you are blocked by fear or performance anxiety.

#1 Bring awareness to your thoughts of self-doubt.

See if you can notice in the moment when the thought appears. Even if you don’t notice in the moment, keep a journal every day and go back over your day to bring awareness to when you noticed self-doubt.

#2 Recognize that this habit of self-doubt was created by the mind to keep you safe.
You are not bad, your thoughts are not bad. Be kind to your mind and yourself. This is not one more thing to shame yourself about. You are doing the work to shift your limiting beliefs.

#3 Offer yourself a supportive touch or a kind phrase of support.

Once you start to notice your patterns, is it possible to bring some kindness to the moment of self-doubt? What would you say to a good friend who was experiencing doubt? Can you offer those same words to yourself?

#4 Ask yourself, "How could I best serve the greater good at this time?

This question will never have you shrink back in fear. Take the opportunity offered to you as a vote of confidence. Share what you have with the world.

You can free yourself from the pain of self-doubt and become more realistic about your gifts and your potential.

Trust love more than your old wounds.

There is a group event on Zoom this Thursday, April 13th if you enjoyed this material and wish to learn more - check our events tab.

04/08/2023

Yes!

04/06/2023

We hope you can join us next week.

I haven’t worked with a parent who wasn’t hard on themselves and/or felt some shame about the way they’ve parented. I truly believe we are all doing the best we can.

I also believe that self-compassion is essential for self-regulation.

Next Thursday night, 4/13, join me and Denise Funfar on Zoom for Nurture the Nurturer: Self-Compassion for Parents.

Both Denise and I believe in this work so much that we are offering the 90 minute experiential workshop on a sliding scale. Take a look and register. https://www.becomingpeaceful.com/event-details/nurture-the-nurturer

If the investment means this opportunity is out of reach for you, please message me. We will turn no one away. 💕

04/04/2023

Here is something you can do when you’re struggling or feeling like you made a big mistake.

You know those times when you are being hard on yourself and you risk ruminating about how inadequate you are or like you wish you had done something different?!

1.) Can you notice what’s happening in your body? Is there a felt experience in the body? If you can’t tell, use your imagination: what if you could tell?

2.) Can you offer yourself a soothing and supportive gesture, like a hand on the heart?

3.) What would you say to a good friend who was experiencing something similar? Without giving advice, what would you say to support them? Can you offer these same words to yourself?

This may feel awkward and forced at first, but with time, your body and mind are comforted in knowing that a compassionate response (pleasant emotion) accompanies challenging emotions.

This soothes us by making us feel safe, disarming the habitual fear, rumination and fight or flight response so common for many.

Check out the upcoming mindful self-compassion workshops and courses here: https://tinyurl.com/2bzdyutt

Source: MSC program by Kristin Neff and Chris Germer.

03/31/2023

At some point in a healing journey, it becomes helpful to intentionally shift out of the old habits that no longer serve us. Maybe we developed a pattern of fixing in order to experience a sense of safety and control.

If safety now exists in our environment and we are starting to trust ourselves, but this not yet reflected in our body sensations and habitual thoughts, noticing what we want can help to gently reprogram how we approach life. We can start to move toward what we want instead of always away from what we don’t want.

* a little reminder that I’m a coach who works with a high-functioning, motivated population. This type of advice can increase shame, especially in people who are currently not able to move past fixing or who are in the middle of the hard times. Please know that doing your best is always enough and if this isn’t helpful, ignore it. All musings are shared with loving support and zero judgement 🤗