09/03/2025
Colorado has changed me like nothing else has โจ
Itโs true when they say you canโt heal in the same environment that hurt you.
Your nervous system requires a certain amount of regulation to feel safe enough to begin to process your trauma โ otherwise youโre stuck in survival mode, continuing to push through and tamp down the things youโre trying not to feel.
Thatโs not sustainable long-term.
In fact, this whole year for me has been about discovering what really is sustainable for me in the long run. Friendships, jobs, areas of concentration.
They also say life is cyclical but what does that really mean? The way trees shed their leaves in the winter, the way snakes shed their skin when they grow.
We are constantly in a state of learning and releasing, ebbing and flowing. ๐
Itโs when we hold on to things past their season is when things start to feel stuck. Like youโre forcing your body to keep going when your mind is somewhere else entirely. You forget to be present, to experience whatโs happening in the here and now.
You forget to romanticize life, the beauty of what it really means to be alive at this exact moment in time.
I think of how I am truly the first woman in my lineage to shatter the ideals and cycles that have kept us docile, submissive, obedient.
Every decision I have ever made has brought me to this exact place and in that regard, I donโt regret it. I canโt say Iโd do it all over again ๐ but Iโll take it.
Because this life Iโm creating now, in this moment, itโs everything I ever dreamed of and more. Thank you spirit for never letting me settle where in my heart I knew I didnโt belong ๐คโจ
