10/04/2024
I've had a lot of friends reach out this week asking me if I know of ways they can help in the aftermath of Hurricane Helene. It got me thinking about how and why we show up for others.
I understand the grief and sadness we feel seeing others in distress can drive us to act quickly, to do whatever we think we can to help. But it’s important for us to remember that, in times of disaster, well-meaning actions can sometimes strain already limited resources.
I wanted to write to remind myself and folks in my online community that sadness and grief for others can sometimes cause us to center ourselves—our need to help, to feel better through helping—without realizing it. I’ve experienced this quite a few times personally. It’s a natural reaction that usually stems from deep caring, but one we need to be mindful of.
Let’s focus on supporting the needs of suffering communities, not on how we think we should help or assuming what needs to be done.
Instead, we should check in with affected folks or local groups already on the ground who know what’s needed and be willing to help in those ways. Showing up uninvited, or without coordination, can add to the burden of stretched resources, so it’s best to join organized efforts or wait until help is truly requested. There are SO many ways to help from afar!
And as many folks in the thick of it have been posting, don't expect individuals to respond to messages, write letting them know you are thinking of them and available for help if they need it.
For those of you who are herbally-inclined, Janet Kent has a powerful piece I urge you to read. Uncontainable Night: Herbs for Grief. Link in comments.
