12/10/2025
🏆 Your Win, Your Story. No One Else Gets to Edit It.
Imagine you just did something awesome. Maybe you stayed sober for a whole year. Maybe you finished a tough class. Maybe you found a great job. You feel amazing!
You share the news. You feel proud.
And then, someone says something like this:
“That’s great, but you should really focus on finding a better apartment next.”
“We knew you could do it. You should thank the agency more often for helping you.”
“I’m happy for you, but you forgot to mention the person who gave you that first chance.”
Suddenly, the happy feeling shrinks. Someone took your win and tried to change it, add a homework assignment, or take some of the credit.
This is a real problem, especially when you are in recovery and working hard every single day. Your success belongs to you. And we need to talk about how to keep it that way.
🛑 The Stop Sign: Your Win Is Not a Group Project
When you achieve something big—or even something small that felt huge to you—it is your moment.
People who love you (family, friends) and groups that help you (agencies, sponsors) should be cheering you on. That’s their job!
But sometimes, people make a mistake. They try to step into your spotlight for one of two reasons:
They Want Credit: They think, “I helped them, so I should get some of the praise.”
They Want Control: They think, “I know what’s best for them, so I need to tell them what they should do next.”
In both cases, they are trying to say: “This isn’t just about you. It’s also about me.”
That is a lie. Your victory is 100% about you.
💖 What True Celebration Looks Like
Think about watching a runner cross the finish line of a race. They are tired, they are happy, and they did it. What does a good crowd do?
They cheer.
They clap.
They might hand the runner water.
They don't rush up to the runner and say:
"You should have run faster."
"Your running shoes are old."
"I’m the one who told you to sign up for this race, so thank me first."
True support is simple and clean: It cheers for the win and doesn't ask for anything in return.
If a family member, friend, or agency tries to tell you what you should have done or what you must do next, they are confusing support with control.
🛡️ How to Protect Your Success (Without Being Mean)
You don't need to start a fight, but you do need to protect your good feelings. When someone tries to take over your moment, here are ways you can kindly take your power back:
1. Keep It Short and Firm.
If someone says, “You should have thanked your sponsor first,” you can smile and say:
“I appreciate that. I’m focusing on celebrating this huge milestone right now.”
2. Don’t Take the Bait.
If someone tries to give you new "homework" right after your win, like: “Now that you’ve done this, you need to call that job counselor,” you can reply:
“I hear you. That’s a good thought for next week. Today, I’m just enjoying this success.”
3. Give Credit Where It’s Due, But Keep the Power.
It’s fine to thank the people who helped you. It’s your choice who and when you thank them. No one gets to demand it.
If an agency tries to take too much credit, you can say (to a friend or to yourself):
“The program gave me the tools, but I was the one who did the work.”
🌟 Remember This: You Are the Hero of Your Story
You are on a journey that is harder than most people know. Every single small win—and every big one—is because you showed up.
You did the hard work. You made the tough choices. You walked the path.
When you succeed, your job is to feel good about it. You don't have to explain it. You don't have to apologize for it. And you definitely don't have to let anyone change it.
Celebrate your wins fully. They are yours.
If you are celebrating a win today, what is it? No details needed, just name the victory and let us celebrate you!
