Breathing through Grieving

05/29/2026

05/20/2026

I have done this 💔
Missing my son terribly 💔

05/13/2026

Grief can make you so incredibly tired.

And I’m not talking about the kind of tired that a cup of coffee, a nap, or even a full night of sleep can fix. I mean the kind of exhaustion that settles deep inside you. The kind that comes from carrying pain, sadness, memories, longing, and heartache all at once.

It’s a kind of tired that people don’t always see,
but those of us who’ve lived through deep loss know it well.

When I was deep in my own grief, people would sometimes say things like, “You should try to get some rest,” and I know they meant well. But grief doesn’t always let you rest, even when you need it. You can lie down, close your eyes, and still feel your mind racing through memories, regrets, unanswered questions, and all the things you wish had gone differently.

Here’s the thing…you can be physically exhausted and still unable to find any real peace.

That’s one of the hard parts about grief. It doesn’t just break your heart. It drains you emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually.

I remember days when even the smallest things felt overwhelming. There were times when getting dressed felt like too much. Taking a shower felt like work. Making something to eat felt like an accomplishment. And instead of being gentle with myself and recognizing that I was doing the best I could, I would sometimes feel frustrated that I wasn’t doing more.

I think a lot of grieving people do that.

We judge ourselves by the standards of the world around us,
even when we’re carrying something incredibly heavy inside.

Grief slows everything down while our minds are just trying to make sense of something that feels impossible. Our bodies are carrying the weight of stress, sorrow, and survival every single day.

That takes energy. A lot of energy!

If you’ve been feeling tired in your grief, I hope you’ll stop and remind yourself that there’s a reason.

You’re not lazy.
You’re not weak.
You’re not failing.

You’re grieving.

Gary Sturgis
Author: ‘SURVIVING GRIEF – 365 Days A Year’

05/12/2026

All the time 💔💔💔

05/01/2026

💕💕💕💕

🩷🌸

04/25/2026

All of this!!!

Grief doesn’t always look the way people think.

It’s not always some sappy image of someone crying and sitting by a window staring out at the rain.

Sometimes it looks a little more unhinged than that.

After my loss, there were days when the signs that I wasn’t doing okay were pretty obvious.

Like the morning I walked out of the house wearing two different sneakers. One was white and one was grey. And the weird thing is I didn’t even notice until hours later.

And I don’t even think I cared once I did notice it.

There were stretches where I didn’t shower in days. Not because I didn’t believe in being clean, but because even the smallest tasks felt like too much. I would usually just start negotiating with myself. “Maybe tomorrow.” And then tomorrow would come and it would still feel like too much.

And then there was all the crap I was eating. Potato chips for breakfast and powdered donuts for dinner. Oh…and wine. Usually sometimes for both breakfast and dinner. (Usually I just slept through lunch.) It was just survival and reaching for whatever was easy, whatever was there, and whatever didn’t require me to do much. Or make me go out.

There were days I avoided people, not because I didn’t care, but because I didn’t know how to explain what was happening to me. How do you tell someone that you feel lost in your own life? That you’re functioning on the outside, but on the inside everything feels like it’s falling apart.

I just always hoped that the next day would feel a little different. Maybe a little better. And sometimes it did and sometimes it didn’t

But I want you to know, because you really might need to hear it, that if you feel this way, that you’re not doing okay, it doesn’t mean you’re failing at grief. And it doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong.

Here’s the thing…it just means you’re in it.

It means your heart is trying to process something that doesn’t make sense. It means your mind is overwhelmed. It means your body is carrying more than it knows what to do with.

And they’re not signs that you’re broken…they’re just signs you’re grieving.

Gary Sturgis
Author: ‘SURVIVING GRIEF – 365 Days A Year’

04/24/2026

Gary Sturgis
Author: 'SURVIVING GRIEF - 365 Days A Year'