Guiding Gates Doula

05/27/2026

Why do doulas call laboring people 𝘤𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵s and not 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵s?

📖The word 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵 implies that the person is sick or needs to be treated. It comes from the Latin 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪, which means to suffer.

📖C𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵 comes from Latin 𝘤𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘦, which means to lean. It's used to describe a person who uses the professional advice of another.

As the word implies, our clients lean on us and we share our knowledge. We do NOT seek to "fix" our clients, because they are not broken. We work solely for the client and their best interests...not the hospital, not big pharma, not the doctor, not ourselves.

05/23/2026

Before you click away on these images, please understand that I am NOT telling you what to do. This post is NOT about the safety of any of the mentioned practices/interventions.

I'm just here doing my doula thing and offering you alternatives to things you might have thought were "mandatory." Many of these alternatives are safe options under specific situations, especially if mom and baby are doing well.

I know that C-sections, cervical exams, monitoring, etc., have had amazing outcomes for some of you. In fact, this might even be your preferred way of laboring. You do you!

05/19/2026

A client sent me this message recently about her labor experience two years ago.

Seventeen years ago, my sister picked up my hair in the middle of my awful 24-hour labor. I didn't ask her to. I wasn't worried about my hair. I have no idea what I looked like until that point. But when she ran her fingers through my hair and pulled it back, I felt connected and grounded. I somehow felt like she gave me strength by seeing me as more than just a vessel. She saw the woman in me who needed to be nurtured and humanized.

I also still remember that.

💗It's the small acts of kindness in labor that stay with you a lifetime.💗

05/15/2026

I had no idea that by becoming a doula, I'd also be a:

👩‍⚕️Counselor
👩‍👦Babysitter
💆🏽‍♀️Massage therapist
💗Motivational speaker
📣Patient rights advocate
🎨Placenta artist
🌿Herbalist
🍼Lactation guide
👩🏼‍💻Website developer
🛠MacGyver, of sorts

I've always been a jack of all trades, and it's kind of neat that I get to do all of that. There's never a dull day at "the office," and I love all the skills I've acquired along the way!

05/12/2026

This one here kills me.

If this were you, would you:

A) Give up your dream birth to please your husband

B) Find a compromise that hopefully he can get behind (birth center, labor as long as possible at home, choose a home birth provider he's comfortable with, if that's even possible)

C) Deal with him being upset and give birth without his support

D) Try even harder to wear him down (using any means necessary)

I'm no therapist, but I think there's more to this story than the disapproval of a home birth. I've sadly encountered a few clients who want a home birth and their spouse doesn't. They don't want to rock the boat, so they just do as they're told. This denial of her wishes tells me his decision is likely based on lack of information or there's a control issue in the marriage.😬

05/08/2026

Just a little FYI for the working mamas!

05/05/2026

Hampton Roads friends, did you know I offer rebozo relaxation sessions?

Pregnancy is a time of many changes, including physical ones that tend to leave you feeling achy and uncomfortable. I offer physical comfort and relaxation using a Mexican rebozo. During this 45-minute session, I will maneuver and stretch your body using the rebozo and provide a light massage to help you feel relaxed.
Available for clients and non-clients.

👉Book: https://calendly.com/guidinggatesdoula/rebozo-session-clone?month=2026-04

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XdGAd3tYOtc&source_ve_path=OTY3MTQ&embeds_referring_euri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.guidinggatesdoula.com%2F

1 like. "Rebozo Relaxation Session"

04/30/2026

Yes, you've absolutely seen the worst of home births. Your job is to see the scary stuff, to help those who need medication and interventions. Of course, to you, home birth is risky. But complications don't happen 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 you were home. They happen while you were home. A good midwife does her job and chooses a transfer when it's medically necessary.

What you don't see are the home births that go well. They will never come to you. You will never know that five miles down the road from you is a mother cradling her newborn baby, surrounded by her family and midwife.

The truth isn't what you see.

-About 90% of home births are free of complications. The majority of transfers are due to long labor or pain meds.
-The C-section rate is around 6% vs 30% at many hospitals.

04/27/2026

This is exactly why you need a doula!😂

We don't just give you good feelings, we EDUCATE.

*This is actually part of a spoofy book and the illustrations are hilarious. https://www.amazon.com/dp/1409175847/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_S0MP77QY1NBH5XP89F7P

04/22/2026

Birth isn't always sunshine and rainbows. Even birth workers are left with experiences that are less than ideal.

"Sure, my plan detailed what I wanted to avoid, how I would labor, and the newborn procedures we preferred. It all checked out...it was easy to read and even buttered up the hospital staff. The goal: healthy mom and baby. Who doesn't want that?

Me. I wanted more."

The Five Mistakes I Made Giving Birth