Crisp white cabinets and clean flat surfaces – I never imagined that this is what my home office would look like someday. I’d like to welcome you to my workspace, the official home of Ash & Ash Noshery.
My son’s name is Asher.
We make up the “Ash & Ash” in Ash & Ash Noshery.
I started baking about 18 years ago when I was in grade school. I moved from cookies, to muffins, straight into decorating home-made cakes, and ending up in breads.
In November, my son was born. At the time, I was in a dead end job that I dreaded going to every day. My heart had been aching to be a homemaker for a couple years, and now I had this sweet boy that I wanted to spend every single day with.
My husband and I looked at our financials, and no matter which way we spun it, there was no possible way for me to stay home. We just couldn’t afford it. In our BEST case scenario we were going to be $1,000 short every single month. In our worst case – $3,000. Even at my current job we weren’t going to be able to make it.
You guys, babies are expensive.
We talked about me staying home and selling home-made cakes and breads, and it seemed perfect. But no matter what we did, it didn’t seem financially possible.
So I prayed and I prayed, and I cried and I prayed. We fought and we argued. We went over a million different options and none of them added up. He wanted me to stay home with Asher, and I wanted that too.
I couldn’t sleep at night. My anxiety got to the point where I constantly felt like there was an actual bomb inside of my chest and it was .0001 seconds AFTER it started to explode.
I woke up one morning angry and anxiety ridden. My husband and I just looked at each other. He pulled me into his arms, and I broke down. I decided in that moment to give up fighting myself. I was going to quit my job, stay home with my son, and bake for a living.
I was going to leave my success in the hands of my creator, as He is the one who gave me my son and the heart of a homemaker. He was the one who brought the idea of baking back into the picture, and He had been setting me up for this for my entire life.
In the moment I told my husband my plan, a wave of actual peace washed over my entire being – and I have felt it ever since. I knew then that I was on the right path.
So here I am, brushing the paralyzing fear off my shoulder, dusting the flour off my hands, and putting my heart and my family into His arms – trusting that He will make this work.
So each day, I wake up and see my new office. I see the opportunity to support my family and to feed my community. I see visions of my son standing on his tiptoes on a chair helping me mix the batter and scoop out the cookie dough. I see my husband coming home to a house smelling like vanilla cupcakes, and I see the house enveloped in the scent of warm cookies on a rainy day as my son naps. I see my tables and counters covered in frosted cupcakes just waiting to be boxed and delivered. And I see myself teaching my son how to braid the challah.
And I am so looking forward to that.
