Selfistry

02/13/2026

I recently had a client say something that brought tears to my eyes.

After a consequential and vulnerable conversation, he said, "Sarah, you’re like a great jazz musician. You riff on the spiritual journey with language that is melodic ... expressive of what wants to come through ... and spot-on regarding what's longing to be heard."

This reflection touched me deeply. There's nothing like feeling so well-received. But, his feedback is especially cool because what you may not know about me is this …

I’ve always had a longing to be a jazz musician.

I played piano growing up, and a bit of violin, cello, and guitar along the way. I can hold a beat. I can read music. I even got an electric piano as a 60th birthday gift, hoping to enact my dream of riffing with sound. However, given the limits of attention in the space-time continuum, it just hasn’t happened.

Yet.

Still, how exciting to imagine that my dream may be showing itself through words rather than tones!

My client reminded me — being an accomplished musician in his own right — that modern jazz was born out of tremendous suffering and existential angst. Just like the spiritual quest!

"Jazz," he said, "is both a crying out from our deepest pain, and a pathway through it. And this is the experience I have being with you. You name my angst, you meet it and hold me, and you speak a way forward."

So, today, still floating in the liminal wake of my dear friend Dot's dying and her beautiful burial, I've decided not to overthink this email and just riff ... on our existential angst and a way through. Improv style. See if I can live up to my client's praise.

Let me know how it lands in your ears and heart. Am I naming your angst, meeting you, and offering a way through?

Let's begin here ...

Our angst is our liberation. (With a deep bow to my beloved friend and teacher, JunPo.)

If our deepest longing is to know who we are and why we're here, then why do we invest in a life that follows a script written by cultural history and biological evolution, when underlying (and within) this script lives something far more interesting, enlivening and mysterious?

Right here. Always here. Right now.

Energy. Love. God. Truth. Call it by whatever name — it is the ocean we swim in, the stuff we're made of.

It is also that which we tend to dismiss. It's hidden in plain sight. It doesn't need us to notice it. It just is. And, if we are it, and held by it, why bother noticing or seeking it? Why not just be it?

Turns out, the impulse to figure out what to do in order to be is activated precisely when angst is present. I'd even say, the impulse is the angst.

The angst pulls us out of the script for a moment, when our story becomes too painful or messed up and all we want is to be free of suffering. To find ease.

Then, in our desperation and despair, we search for the panacea to our angst within the story from which the angst arose. Oh no! We hunt in the mud for soap to clean the mud, and we only make more mud. This is when the madness can set in.

But, if we were to stop and meet the angst ... to touch its root rather than treat the symptoms, we would encounter the path to our liberation.

It’s that simple.

Just not that easy.

Here’s the thing: my take on all this is nothing new. It's found throughout history — in the esoteric threads of organized religions, in the dens of philosophers, and even in the laboratories of scientists.

This is the view of what's called nondual reality, which suggests that our self-absorption in our story is the source of our angst, the sacred mystery is where we become free of our angst, and though these realms may seem like two separate realities, from the nondual perspective, they are not two things. They are one.

Therefore, if the story is our angst and the mystery is our liberation, and they are not two ... then our angst IS our liberation.

Ta da!

Now, we're at the point where my riff can get funky and definitely needs more practice, because — though an adequate and useful term — most people have never heard the word nondual. And those who have are often unsure exactly what it means.

So, I invite you to step into the sanctuary of The Art of Being Human, and experience jazz-style learning with me and a small group of incredible humans, where our inquiry will include the nondual worldview as an instrument in our music making.

Warning.

Nondual reality is a paradox. Period. The mind can never comprehend it. Sorry if this disappoints you. Or makes you wary. Or weary.

This, again, is the angst knocking.

Shhhh ... Let your being tune in.

Listen. Soften.

Instead of grasping for understanding, try surrendering your need to know. Let the mind collapse into the unknowable.

Let it fall right through that angst.

Into liberation.

When we gather for The Art of Being Human, we will not just discuss theory, we will practice inhabiting this living song. We will learn how to allow our lives to settle into a ground of ease and clarity .... maybe even rewrite the script we inherited into a story more reflective of reality.

There's room for a few more voices to join the ensemble — if you feel ready to stop being a spectator watching the show and ready to start playing the music with others.

We convene soon.

01/24/2026

Selfistry makes it to Waco!

01/20/2026

I have a shelf full of books on personal development, a history of monastic living, and a lineage of rabbis behind me. Maybe your shelves — and your history — look similar.

However ...

If we’re not mindful, we can sometimes become what I call intellectual orphans. We’ve gathered threads of wisdom from so many places ... including yoga intensives, plant medicine journeys, and/or silent retreats. We have lots of data. We have good maps.

But we often lack the most vital element of all: a place to sort through the threads with other people who are aspiring weavers just like us.

At this point in the online learning space, most offerings are built for personal consumption. Evergreen or live. You sit, you watch, you listen. You’re a viewer, not a participant meaningfully engaged with other participants.

I’m offering something else.

I am convening a digital salon called The Art of Being Human.

Historically, salons were the underground of the Enlightenment. They were intimate gatherings, usually led by women, where the rigid rules of institutions were replaced by the alchemy of shared inquiry. They were places where you didn't just learn about philosophy — you became a philosopher. They were places where you didn’t just talk, you inspired one another to walk.

Selfistry is a sanctuary for inquiry. It’s a laboratory for those who are tired of the expert on the stage and are ready for the council of the curious.

We look at the question of how to be a good human through the lenses of history, science, spirituality, and psychology.

But more importantly, we focus on integration. How does your weaving actually show up in your marriage? In your work? In the way you handle a chaotic and uncertain world?

Whether you’re a preferred hermit looking for a purposeful connection or an extrovert looking for a grounding wire, you have a place here.

We’re not just studying the art of being human. We’re practicing it. Real time. Real life.

We begin February 24.

The salon is convening.

The sanctuary is prepared.

View the Syllabus & Claim Your Seat

https://kxnmovoclp9qxt.kartra.com/page/The-Art-of-Being-Human

12/03/2025

Hello Dear Ones,

As the Solstice approaches and we turn inward toward this annual threshold, I want to let you know about an experience you may be interested in — or that someone in your circle might welcome.

My soul sister and colleague HeatherAsh and I will be meeting up in Austin at the end of January. We teach together in Sedona every autumn, and for the past two years we’ve offered a post-conference intensive with 8–12 women, giving each person an opportunity to untangle a knot in their life and find clarity and ease through guided inquiry and personal care woven with Selfistry and Warrior Heart work. The details are listed under the post-conference add-on.

Between now and then, HeatherAsh’s community is hosting a three-day Solstice gathering. If you're wanting to convene with other women and create ceremonies and rituals around the Solstice, check it out — it’s free.

Stay tuned for more emails with details about 2026 The Art of Being Human program launching in March. And, please know, I have lowered the rates for my one-on-one mentoring sessions in order to align with the realities of our times and the care that is being called for. Feel free to share with anyone whom you feel might benefit from some personal guidance right now.

Big blessings to you and your loved ones.

Hope to see you in 2026.

https://hierophantpublishing.com/warrior-goddess-wisdom-weekend/ref/74/

https://warriorgoddess.com/wonderland/?utm_source=kit&utm_medium=email&utm_term=wginvite1&utm_content=solstice-retreat-regpage&utm_campaign=0126sos

https://kxnmovoclp9qxt.kartra.com/page/The-Art-of-Being-Human

https://kxnmovoclp9qxt.kartra.com/page/mentoring

07/28/2025

Most of what passes for “personal growth” these days is just role maintenance.

A tidier identity. A more optimized performance. Another layer of persona, painted with spiritual hues.

But what if the real journey isn’t adding to our identity or modifying it — but dropping beneath it all?

Not to transcend.
Not to bypass.
But to root.

To source clarity in a time of chaos. To move from awareness, not reaction. To meet unraveling systems (personal and global) from a deeper ground.

Ram Dass calls that shift “role to soul.” Not as a concept. As a lived orientation.

It takes time to reorient on this way. It takes sincerity. And it’s not always easy.

But when we apply ourselves — when the roles recede and the noise settles —
something unmistakable comes online.

And from there? I suspect we can can meet anything with curiosity and equanimity.

If you’re interested in exploring whether this is so — not as more performance, but sustained inquiry — join me this September in Healdsburg.

Small group. Deep space. Investigating the role and the soul together.

September 24–28, Bishop’s Ranch, Healdsburg

Message me or follow the link to learn more.

07/08/2025

I’ve been accused of plagiarizing Internal Family Systems.

The truth? I respect the work—but I see things differently.

This blog clarifies a core distinction at the heart of Selfistry: the difference between refining the self… and releasing it.

What if the “true self” isn’t something to discover, but something to dissolve? In this piece, I explore a subtle but radical distinction between Selfistry... Read more »

07/07/2025

Fun feature! Great introduction to me and my work.
Please read.
Please share.
Oh and ... while you're at it ...
Please be kind to one another. Please be willing to pause, reflect, and be open to other perspectives. Please love more.

We were lucky to catch up with Sarah Marshank recently and have shared our conversation below. Sarah, looking forward to hearing all of your

06/26/2025

I am so happy to share my recent conversation with my mentor and dear friend Debbie Rosas, the co-founder of Nia.

In this episode we explore how the body and life are not obstacles to awakening, but profound gateways to becoming an empowered, evolving spiritual being.

Together, we dive into what it truly means to live in alignment with the feminine and masculine energies of today’s world. Beyond outdated definitions, toward a new, integrated vision of wholeness. We reflect on what it means to be a woman in this time: not just empowered, but fluid, receptive, and fierce in her devotion to change, to embodiment, and to co-creating a world rooted in presence and possibility.

I share some nuggets of wisdom from nearly a decade in solo retreat—not in a monastery, but through embodied, everyday inquiry. My journey reminds us that evolution isn’t about escape or perfection—it’s about meeting ourselves exactly as we are and choosing to grow with grace. My mind/body became my teacher, my temple, and my map for navigating the spiritual terrain of being human.

In this soul-stirring conversation, we talk about:

Embodied spirituality as a way of life

Embracing the dance of feminine and masculine within us all

The sacredness of relationships and our evolving roles

Radical self-acceptance and the power of not knowing

Creating a new empowered version of "self" to meet the challenges of our time

This episode is a call to presence. To live and lead from wholeness. To honor change as sacred. And to courageously step into a new way of being—one that makes the world better through the integrity of our embodiment and the curiosity of our becoming.

Watch: https://youtu.be/vr5zvgcbjng?si=7GgJakiNMS8N-ZR8

Listen: https://play.libsyn.com/embed/episode/id/37117150/height/192/theme/modern/size/large/thumbnail/yes/custom-color/008080/time-start/00:00:00/hide-playlist/yes/font-color/ffffff?inf_contact_key=ada61ac384cf79df6d2e729f03ae005c680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1

Learn more about Debbie Rosas:

www.debbierosas.com

www.nianow.com

06/09/2025

Let’s be honest.

We’re swimming in “solutions.”

Productivity hacks. Mindset reframes. Purpose accelerators.

Fix your nervous system. Optimize your mindset. Manifest your dream life.

And yet…

So many of us—especially high-achievers—still feel unmoored. (If we’re willing to admit it.)

We’re burned out.
Disconnected.
Quietly asking: What am I doing all this for?

It’s not because we’re doing it wrong.
It’s because the frame itself is no longer working.

That’s why I designed Reorient Your Self.

Not a self-improvement plan.
Not a webinar of tips and takeaways.

But a space to step back.
To pause.
To recalibrate.
To ask the kind of questions that don’t just shift your strategy — but shift you.

Because Selfistry isn’t another life hack.
And it’s definitely not a spiritual shortcut.
It’s a space to feel.
To think for yourself.
To get honest about what matters.

And to remember how to listen—not just to your mind, but to your whole Self.

It’s reflective.
It’s relational.
It’s uncomfortable at times —
And yes, it’s transformative.

We begin next Wednesday.

If you're ready to reorient — not just what you do, but how you see — come.

https://kxnmovoclp9qxt.kartra.com/page/re-orientyourself

05/02/2025

Hello friends,

I’m sitting on my couch in my beautiful home on one of the most breathtaking shorelines in the world. Feeling waves of holy gratitude for the good fortune of this life — my life.

Last night I woke myself from a nightmare, shrieking — one of those blood-curdling screams you only hear in the movies.

My husband is away, so it was just me, waking to myself, the darkness, the racing blood in my veins, my heart pounding.
Honestly, the dream’s content doesn’t matter — nor does the fact that I watched Heretic before going to sleep that night (LOL).

What lingered was how quickly I woke myself up. Or… something woke me. Or… waking up happened. I’m not even sure which verb to use. You with me?

I slept the rest of the night with the light on.

This morning, in meditation, I had the insight that maybe death is like that. Maybe I’ll just wake myself up. Into another realm. And it’ll be quick. Maybe a touch unsettling. But, not only is there nothing to fear… there’s nothing to do. It just happens. All by itself. And I can stop dreading death (or sleep, or loss) — and lean more fully into the miracle of it all.

Which brings me to the well I’m currently drinking from — the work and words of Bayo Akomolafe, who I recently had the gift of sitting with at Esalen: Check out one of his moving conversations here: https://www.ciispod.com/bayo-akomolafe

Years ago, I was ushered into another phase of my life by Stephen Jenkinson. Before that, Ram Dass. Of course, there were — and are — many others. But these figures, these wells, have shaped me deeply. They’ve offered archetypal teachings that carried me through the rivers of transformation.

And I’m learning to trust that. Trust that Life will carry me. Just like the dream did.

Anyway…

I felt moved to share all of this here today. Because honestly, I’m not sure what else to do with myself — or with the beautiful undoing that Bayo is invoking (and nourishing) in me.

And I offer this post with a quiet blessing — that you, too, are drawing from a well with water that nourishes you in these times.

For me, this season is about allowing:
The uncertainty.
The grief.
The terror.
And yes — the joy.

If you’re in a time of undoing or seeking — or feeling something calling you from just beneath the surface — I’m here. This is the work I live for. My next cycle of teaching and mentoring is stirring to life. Stay tuned.

03/29/2025

Let’s talk about how to be okay when you’re not okay.

Being simultaneously okay and not-okay is an oxymoron — a figure of speech in which apparently contradictory terms appear in conjunction.

The clue to their coexistence?

That word: apparently.

It points to the possibility that what seems impossible might only appear that way — depending on how you’re looking. And if you shift the way you look, a new possibility emerges.

What if there’s a way of being — a steady, underlying sense of peace — that can hold you, even when life feels absolutely and undeniably out of control?

What if ...

This state of ease doesn’t bypass emotional, physical, or mental suffering?

This peace can hold both joy and grief — allowing you to fully experience breathtaking beauty while also metabolizing devastating heartbreak and loss?

Both ancient wisdom and modern science point to ways of accessing it?

What if life is out of control — but our response to it doesn’t have to be?

If this feels possible, or even just hopeful, but you’re unsure how you'd ever get there, you’re in the right place. Your skepticism is welcome.

So stay with me. This post is a bit longer than usual —maybe make yourself a cup of tea. It might just be worth your quiet attention. Because in a world unraveling at the seams, being able to access this deeper place of ease may not be a luxury. It may be a lifeline.

How to access it?

I won’t promise five easy steps.

Nope.

There’s no hack.

But there is a path. And it’s trustworthy — especially when taken one step at a time.

It also becomes easier as you learn to trust your way.

It begins with knowing thy self — understanding how your mind works, how your body functions, and how your awareness can expand beyond familiar habits of perception.

It deepens with supportive assistance — a guide, a framework, a community. And it unfolds when you give it the time and attention it deserves.

Please, don’t rush. Yes, there’s urgency in the world. But rushing often creates the very waste of time we’re trying to avoid.

Instead, consciously step in.

Stay steady.

Stay curious.

You see, once you believe there is a there there, the key to sustainably living from that peace is discerning what truly works for you — both to arrive there and to remain.

Here are three basic elements to include in your process:

1. Cultivate an understanding of what I’m talking about. Use your brain’s cognitive capacities to comprehend and strategize — while also investigating its own learned beliefs.

2. Cultivate an embodied experience of your nervous system’s regulation capabilities as well as your body's organic ability to respond to internal and external stimuli — while also investigating its acquired habits.

3. Cultivate an awareness that is acutely attentive to noticing and effortlessly tracking your life within a whole that includes others, planet, and cosmos — while also investigating your weak or untapped modes of perception.

The journey usually begins with a pause — a recognition of a call for change — followed by your willingness to step in: to reflect and consider, to explore and wonder... about your life. About life itself.

Any anxiety, depression, disorientation, or general feelings of being out of sync with your purpose or the meaning of your life … are all welcome.

So, what might I offer as a next step?

Maybe take an initial inventory of the three elements and identify which one you’re drawn to explore first. Begin there, as you allow the other elements to rest in the background of your considerations.

Find your pace as you weave your wondering into your day-to-day choices and behaviors. Consider what you’re reading, listening to, and who you’re spending time with. Begin to let go of choices that no longer serve you and integrate the ones you’re ready to take on with sincerity.

Your process can be accelerated through having a trustworthy guide. This choice, too, is a very personal one. There is no one-size-fits-all for this sort of transformation. Nor is there one messiah that can save us all. So, do your due diligence.

When — not if — you stumble, stand up.

Brush yourself off.

Take another step.

There will be fumbles and tumbles. It’s the way of things.

Though some say there are no mistakes and the universe is always giving us lessons, I prefer not to view the Universe as a schoolmaster, rewarding and punishing me for my good and bad behavior. That view reeks of the warped monotheistic and oppressive patriarchal frameworks I intentionally let go of years ago.

I prefer to view life as one giant art project. And good art is made from plenty of “bad” art. All of it belongs. And much of it can be fun.

Most importantly ...

Though the path to living from ease is itself a path of artistry, the ongoing blossoming of one's life takes on new depth and intensity when expressed from within this bubble of peace I’m speaking of.

So let’s root ourselves — and each other — in this presence. Let’s make our lives into art. Let’s enjoy our lives, before they end.

To make it all real ...

This post was born this morning, when I woke up feeling very not-okay. Troubled by the world. A bit lost in the swirl of “what now?” — both in my life, and my day.

So ...

Instead of fixing my feelings or pushing them away, I made art from them.

I turned to what works for me — what helps me remember, return to, and rest in the okayness beneath/beside/within the not-okayness.

I read and contemplated a poem (attached). I sat in meditation. I made my bed. I went for a walk. I brewed a hot cup of Earl Grey tea with cream and wrote this love letter to you.

All the while, something in me softened. That inner presence began to move to the foreground. And the not-okayness? It receded just enough for me to find my footing again.

This is the artistry I speak of.

This place of ease is real.

It won’t fix everything. It may not fix anything.

But it will give you the clarity and courage to meet what’s here.

And from there… who knows?

The world — your life — just might begin to right itself.