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We don’t have to have it altogether ... life is well, messy, and it was never intended for us to do it alone.
But somewhere along the way some of us got trapped in social idealism’s - that’s a fancy term for all the things we think we “should” have to be considered successful, happy, worthy; you know, things like having the 2.5 kids, fantastic career (with a bank account to match), white picket fence, dynamic personality, and a body that doesn’t wobble (phew, that’s a list!). You know those statements when we think, “I’ll be happy when ...” or “I’ll be fulfilled when ...”.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
My brain knew that I didn’t ACTUALLY need all those things however, that message didn’t translate to my thoughts, feelings and consequent behaviours (which seemed kinda crazy due to the amount of study I’d undertaken in people stuff and that I’d been a healer in talk therapy) .. yet I still found myself over-working and over-giving, worn out, and when I heard others talk of “speaking your truth” and “just be YOU”, the only response that came to mind was “great advice .. but how?”
Unresolved hurt and anger still bubbled beneath the surface and unfortunately reared its head at times and I still had that nagging inner voice (quieter now, albeit still there) that there was something to ‘fix’. And my life’s conundrum ... how to be kind, but not a pushover; to be fierce, but not a bitch, to embody all of me powerfully, yet gracefully. I was sure something was missing and you know what, I was right!
What was missing was loving myself just as I am (doh!), and getting out of my head and living from my heart so that I could discover who I truly am and step into my power (thanks Frozen, love that song!). I could finally breathe.
Now, I’m not referring to ego-love which has you think you’re superior to others; not confident-love where you think that that you sh** doesn’t stink; but where you authentically love yourself with a profound love like you do your loved ones.
Self-love creates joy and magic; wisdom to appreciate the purpose of challenges in life; a knowing that you really have ‘got this!’ irrelevant of outcomes; the ability to rise above those feelings we can be susceptible to like self-doubt, concern for what others think, fear and overwhelm; and failure no longer holds shame or embarrassment as it actually doesn’t define you. It gives clarity to the life you were destined for and the power to create it; your divine light shines brightly.
But here’s the thing ... self-love is a bit like a muscle. It needs to be developed, exercised, and maintained to have power and strength, all of which requires training and time. And this is why I created ‘The Love Yourself Program’ with the content based in personal experience, many years of being a healer in talk therapy and the collaboration with some crazy-arse-magnificent women.
Authentically loving ourselves enables us to truly love others - those dearest to us and our kindred spirits. It was never designed for us to do this on our own and with the love of ourselves and our kindred spirits we can accomplish anything.
You are worthy. You are divine. You are seen. You are needed. You are restored. You are loved.
With love & gratitude, Rebecca x
PS, I often get asked about the name Kindred Spirits and yes it’s an Anne of Green Gables rip off. A character who I think embodied spirit, love and overcame so many obstacles; and of course, where bossom buddies were paramount (+ she was such a great role model for red-heads in a world where is was NOT cool & taught me that being different was AWESOME)!
