23/02/2018
From our friends at Foundfully, a nugget of wisdom buried deep in this week's post: "accept that there is no shame in self-respect" . Amen.
Having clear boundaries is essential. They represent our level of self-worth and how much we honor the principles that guide us.
It is important we prioritize both setting and respecting boundaries because they impact all areas of our lives. When we do, we are able to define who we are instead of who we are not. They help minimize frustrations and reduce stress. We create healthier and happier relationships with family, friends and colleagues.
How can we create healthy boundaries?
Defining them starts with YOU.
The first step, is to get clear on your guiding principles and what you need in order to stay true to who you are. I suggest you write these down. Remember that boundaries should not be created around relationships, but rather around you and your core values.
It is important not only to define what your boundaries are, but also to have clear consequences for when they are pushed (and they will be!). Actions speak louder than words. Identifying and having a pre-determined response or behavior when they are not honored is how to ensure they are respected.
The final and crucial piece however, is how you communicate yours to others. You can have the healthiest boundaries around, but if not properly communicated they cannot be observed and will feel irrelevant. Therefore, say what you mean and mean what you say.
We cannot change others, but we can lead by example. Personal limits are the gatekeepers to our well-being. Be clear and concise and accept that there is no shame in self-respect. It may in turn allow others to find alternative ways to show up and create and voice their own boundaries.