12/05/2025
For most parents, setting boundaries for young kids’ behavior is second nature: No hitting. Don’t interrupt. We don’t grab toys out of other kids’ hands.
But as kids get older, boundaries for social interaction are important too. They need to learn to set boundaries for themselves and respect those of others. And that takes empathy — being able to recognize what others want and need, as well as what they themselves want and need.
It helps to start early, by encouraging young children to talk about their feelings, and think about what others might be feeling. For example, you can ask: “How do you think Mark felt when you took his toy away?”
You can also ask your child to think about how they feel when their older sibling won’t let them play with their friends or won’t share their dessert. Then ask how they think their sibling would feel if they did the same.
One way to help kids understand why it’s important to follow rules is to see them as working both ways. For instance, people are in charge of their own bodies, and it’s not okay to touch them if they don’t want you to, just like it’s not okay for someone to touch you in a way you don’t like.
It’s also important to help kids learn to advocate for themselves when other kids are being pushy. You can help your child plan for what to do when someone isn’t respecting their feelings or boundaries. Go over some simple phrases your child can use: “Please stop.” “I don’t like that.” “It’s my turn now.”
Your example matters too. When kids hear parents checking with each other to see if they’re on the same page before they make decisions, or asking a friend how they feel about something, kids are more likely to follow suit.
Read the full article:
https://childmind.org/article/teaching-kids-boundaries-empathy/
