Clear Reflections Psychotherapy

Clear Reflections Psychotherapy Licensed psychotherapist in NY and NJ
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As 2025 comes to a close and we welcome in 2026, here's some intentions to set for the new year:We may try to enter into...
12/24/2025

As 2025 comes to a close and we welcome in 2026, here's some intentions to set for the new year:
We may try to enter into the new year with a "new year, new me" type of attitude but you're not going to fool anyone (or yourself) that you've become an entirely different person with that transition on the clock from 11:59 PM December 31st to 12:00 AM January 1st.
We still carry our past, what/who has shaped us, and all that we may wish to run away from as we form into the type of person person we wish to be in the new year.
Here is some advice for how to truly move forward:
Sit in the discomfort.
Sit with the anxiety.
Sit with the sadness.
Sit with the anger.
Sit with the frustrations about how you wish things were different.
And listen.
Listen to what comes from sitting with what feels uncomfortable to feel.
Not only are you allowing yourself to process these uncomfortable feelings, but the discomfort is teaching you how to SIT with being uncomfortable.
Because life can be uncomfortable. Your friends and family may get you upset. You may not have gotten that promotion you were working hard to earn. You may carry worry about your kids and whether you're doing the right thing as a parent.
And when you sit with it, you can learn the lesson of resiliency and become stronger and more centered from it.
Unburden yourself and let it go.

Don't let the back to school blues bring you down! Reach out today to schedule a consultation with us!
08/14/2025

Don't let the back to school blues bring you down! Reach out today to schedule a consultation with us!

Treating clients from allllll ages means that I've seen it all. And it also means that I see as well how all patterns de...
10/20/2022

Treating clients from allllll ages means that I've seen it all. And it also means that I see as well how all patterns develop in a full circle moment.

What we might have learned as kids was helpful in our survival in that moment. Children who learn in situations that their emotions are too big for what others may handle may hold in everything that they're feeling. Which turns into adults who don't feel comfortable with others becoming too close to them, adopting the idea that letting others see the real you is too "vulnerable", and that any chaos within must be contained so the chaos outside can remain calm.

Children who learn that the only way to be heard and seen is through their achievements become perfectionists, high achievers, and people pleasers. Which turns into adults with low self esteem, workaholics, and have anxiety in relationships.

Becoming unstuck as an adult helps heal that child who became stuck with hiding themselves to be accepted, heard, and loved.

The term "self care" has been associated a lot with being pampered with physical pleasures such as massages, new haircut...
12/29/2020

The term "self care" has been associated a lot with being pampered with physical pleasures such as massages, new haircuts, and comforting purchases.
But self care is more than just that.
Self care is about taking care of YOU and sometimes that includes putting yourself first in your relationships, your career goals, education, etc.
If a relationship feels uncomfortable and you feel more strained to make yourself feel validated and heard, then perhaps evaluate how healthy the relationship is.
It's okay (and more than okay!) to set boundaries to help a relationship fulfill your bucket if all it makes you feel is depleted instead.

And to that I say: thank you.
12/27/2020

And to that I say: thank you.

It's not that you're broken. It's that the systems in place that molded you into who you have become taught you that you...
12/21/2020

It's not that you're broken.

It's that the systems in place that molded you into who you have become taught you that you are an imperfection in a perfect world.

As humans, we all have an innate drive for connection. It's what has helped us survive and thrive since the beginning of...
12/15/2020

As humans, we all have an innate drive for connection. It's what has helped us survive and thrive since the beginning of time. Group mentality has saved lives as we depend on one another for sharing resources and creating families and communities.

Understanding our need for connection can help explain our own (or someone else's) confusing and hurtful behaviors.

When we lose touch of our connections with others, we can feel a deep sense of loss.That sorrow can be fueled as anger towards the self and others. We may have been hurt by trusting others before and so emotional walls may have been built as means to protect ourselves but we only feel more isolated. We even may have developed our own ideas of what connection is and looks like based on years of broken relationships and cycles of abuse.

But when we finally are able to put ourselves first to acknowledge that we need connection and that we want to receive love, then true relationships with yourself and others can finally form.

And that is what acceptance and serenity can feel like.

Reminder: You are important.Your needs are important.Your boundaries are important.(Now repeat this 5 times... or until ...
12/04/2020

Reminder:
You are important.

Your needs are important.

Your boundaries are important.

(Now repeat this 5 times... or until it sinks in)

In my therapy practice, we will work together on how to feel at peace.But to do that, we have to address our fears. Our ...
11/23/2020

In my therapy practice, we will work together on how to feel at peace.

But to do that, we have to address our fears. Our insecurities. Our ugly truths. And accept them.

When we are no longer running away from what we dread, we can accept and make the changes necessary to have a better life.

In a world that is full of uncertainty, fear, and new situations that can make us feel afraid and anxious- we have the p...
11/18/2020

In a world that is full of uncertainty, fear, and new situations that can make us feel afraid and anxious- we have the power to reframe how we understand what's going on around us.

You are not stuck inside, you are safe at home.

You are not weak, you are learning to be resilient.

You are not mishandling what to do, you are simply learning in an impossible situation.

11/12/2020
New 2020 emojis? Aside from the jokes, think about the last few months you've been wearing a mask. Have you ever noticed...
11/08/2020

New 2020 emojis?

Aside from the jokes, think about the last few months you've been wearing a mask. Have you ever noticed that it may be hard to express your facial emotions with the bottom half of your face covered?

For young children and individuals with social issues, reading facial expressions is very important to understanding context. If your smile can't be seen while you are comforting someone, telling a joke, or even greeting a neighbor, would they understand your intentions behind the content of your words?

Some food for thought as masks (and masking expressions) continue to become normalized in society.

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