DrDeb's Love Yourself Love Your Marriage

09/26/2024

Who Is The Real You?

Brian: You know, Sophie, you’ve just got to stop running your mouth off. I am TIRED of it.

Sophie: And I’m tired of you telling me what to do all the time! I’m a person! I have thoughts in my head, just like you do. Why are my thoughts not good enough?

Brian: Because they aren’t. [Glaring at her] Just listen to me.

Who are these people?

Looks like Brian’s a tough guy, right?

Looks like Sophie is a big complainer and not much more. Look who she chose for a life partner, after all.

Well, that’s not who Brian and Sophie really are. They don’t actually know who they are, but join me at 9 PM Eastern time on Thursday 9-26-2024 on youtube to dig a little deeper and find out.

--And maybe, just maybe, get a glimpse of who YOU are, too.

Brian: You know, Sophie, you’ve just got to stop running your mouth off. I am TIRED of it.Sophie: And I’m tired of you telling me what to do all the time! I’...

09/19/2024

5 Reasons Why Victims Become Perpetrators

Not only that, some witnesses (kids) become victims or perpetrators, too.

Why?

What’s driving the motive to do the very thing that hurt you in the first place?

And what is to be done about it?

(Spoiler Alert: There’s VERY good news at the end.)

Thursday, Sept 19, 2024 at 9 PM Eastern Time

Not only that, some witnesses (kids) become victims or perpetrators, too.Why?What’s driving the motive to do the very thing that hurt you in the first place?...

09/12/2024

https://youtube.com/live/M3S3Hp6uLws?feature=share
I Feel Disconnected From My Spouse

It's truly one of the most painful experiences in marriage: You're supposed to be best friends, the closest of everyone you know. And instead, you're disconnected.

They say go on date night. Have s*x. Talk about it.

I say these are all bad suggestions – and I’ll tell you why in our Live on Thurs the 12th at 9 PM Eastern time.

I’ll also tell you what the 5 top things to do are.

See you then.

It's truly one of the most painful experiences in marriage: You're supposed to be best friends, the closest of everyone you know. And instead, you're disconn...

09/05/2024

Make Your Dream Of Intimacy A Reality

“Ooooh, DrDeb, you are the one that’s dreaming! We are sooooo far from intimate, it’s crazy. We can’t carry on a conversation about what’s for dinner, let alone intimate topics.”

I hear you. Loud and clear.

But I didn’t just start doing this yesterday. Ahem!

I’ve met five thousand people like you.

It’s still possible.

Intimacy is possible in the bedroom, the kitchen, and over the phone. Any time.

Find out how on Thursday September 5, 2024 at 9 PM Eastern Time.

“Ooooh, DrDeb, you are the one that’s dreaming! We are sooooo far from intimate, it’s crazy. We can’t carry on a conversation about what’s for dinner, let al...

08/29/2024

How To Deal With Toxic In-Laws

They meddle.
They accuse.
They gang up on you.
They try to break up your marriage.
They make everyone miserable.

And their child – your partner in life – doesn’t see it.

This is SOOO frustrating.

In fact, he or she takes their side.

How is this possible? How can your intelligent spouse not see that they are terribly wrong?

Find out why this happens – and 3 steps you MUST take on Thursday, August 29, at 9 PM Eastern time.

They meddle.They accuse.They gang up on you.They try to break up your marriage.They make everyone miserable.And their child – your partner in life – doesn’t ...

08/15/2024

When Everything You Bring Up Triggers Your Spouse

“Listen, I just want to know how you FEEL.”

“Are you trying to trap me into telling you something that you’ll use against me?’

“Uh, no. I really wanted to know how you feel.”

-----

“You know, I don’t like when you raise your voice at the kids. My mother always did that.”

“But they do need discipline. What am I supposed to do?”

----

“Could you not get so excited? It scares me.”

“But I was excited.”

----

So what is a spouse supposed to do? Not be themselves?

But then how is the person who is triggered supposed to handle it?

FIND OUT THURSDAY AUG 22 at 9 PM Eastern time -

“Listen, I just want to know how you FEEL.”“Are you trying to trap me into telling you something that you’ll use against me?’“Uh, no. I really wanted to know...

08/08/2024

How To Win Your Partner's Affection

“I’m so scared of losing my marriage” she said. “He actually mentioned the D word.’

Then she started to cry.

This happens every day in homes where someone feels out of control and makes terrible threats to get it back.

What’s the best option on the receiving end?

Do you just see a lawyer?

Do you try to win back your partner’s affection?

Or is there something else to do?

My answer is that there’s something that WILL win their affection AND stop that threat from ever happening again.

WATCH tonight at 9 PM Eastern time

For a Free download of my meditation, "Feeling Your Self Energy," please join my newsletter by going to https://drdeb.comDrDeb is a Marriage & Family Therapi...

08/01/2024

What You Didn't Realize About Secrets In Your Marriage

Sounds good, right? – Keep your own counsel, be independent.

Uh-uh.

Find out tonight at 9 PM Eastern time the 6 reasons people will keep secrets and the 4 horrific results this has on the family and especially the children.

Learn the steps you must take to create a happy, wholesome household.

Sounds good, right? – Keep your own counsel, be independent.Uh-uh.Find out tonight at 9 PM Eastern time the 6 reasons people will keep secrets and the 4 horr...

07/23/2024

5 Reasons Why Your Marriage Needs IFS

Oh no!

They’re at it again! Another finger pointing, knock down, drag out fight.

What’s wrong with this picture? – UH-OH, it’s taking place IN the therapist’s office, the one place they came so they could get their feelings out and they are not safe.

This is baaaad.

And it takes place in marriage counseling offices all over the country. …

But it shouldn’t.

The therapy office should be a safe place.

Not only that, what is the point of another fight anyway when the objective, the real and true objective of marriage counseling should be to become FRIENDS!?!

What does it mean to be friends – and lovers?

Not only does that include safety, but a way to truly heal.

And to express your innermost secrets to a welcoming, accepting, loving audience.

And to never, ever feel shame or blame for who you are or have been.

In fact, to feel loved. By yourself, by your spouse, by your world.

And it also should have a path toward strengthening oneself for the future. Right?

Learn how all this – and more – exists ONLY within the therapy modality of IFS (Internal Family Systems) THURSDAY at 9 PM EST

For a Free download of my meditation, "Feeling Your Self Energy," please join my newsletter by going to https://drdeb.com---------------------------------Oh ...

07/18/2024

Only My Spouse Triggers Me!

Boy, have I heard this one a LOT.

It’s a hidden blame-thing.

You’re saying that there is nothing wrong with YOU but your spouse just provokes you. They’re the ones to blame because of their awful behavior.

Well, you’re half right.

There is nothing wrong with you.

But to get triggered, you have to CARE. If you didn’t care about anything they said, you would not get triggered.

So the real question is NOT, “Why do you care?”

Of course you care – you’re married. Maybe you have kids. You’ve had a life together. Of course you care.

And besides that, if someone who should care back at you acts cruelly, without care, that hurts, too!

So, the real question is: Do you want to keep on caring WITHOUT getting triggered? That is the question.

Because that is entirely possible.

Tonight, at 9 PM Eastern Time, find out why this one person gets under your skin – and most importantly, how to keep the relationship, make it amazing, and not get triggered again.

Boy, have I heard this one a LOT. It’s a hidden blame-thing.You’re saying that there is nothing wrong with YOU but your spouse just provokes you. They’re the...

07/11/2024

5 Reasons Why Your Marriage Needs IFS Therapy

Oh no!

They’re at it again! Another finger pointing, knock down, drag out fight.

What’s wrong with this picture? – UH-OH, it’s taking place IN the therapist’s office, the one place they came so they could get their feelings out and they are not safe.

This is baaaad.

And it takes place in marriage counseling offices all over the country. …

But it shouldn’t.

The therapy office should be a safe place.

Not only that, what is the point of another fight anyway when the objective, the real and true objective of marriage counseling should be to become FRIENDS!?!

What does it mean to be friends – and lovers?

Not only does that include safety, but a way to truly heal.

And to express your innermost secrets to a welcoming, accepting, loving audience.

And to never, ever feel shame or blame for who you are or have been.

In fact, to feel loved. By yourself, by your spouse, by your world.

And it also should have a path toward strengthening oneself for the future. Right?

Learn how all this – and more – exists ONLY within the therapy modality of IFS (Internal Family Systems) tonight at 9 PM EST

Oh no!They’re at it again! Another finger pointing, knock down, drag out fight.What’s wrong with this picture? – UH-OH, it’s taking place IN the therapist’s ...

07/04/2024

06/20/2024

How To Make Your Marriage Better Without Talking About It

You have resentments. Of course you do.

Who wouldn’t with the negligence, the dismissiveness, the insensitivity, the walking-out-of-the-room stuff you’ve put up with?

And now you’ve read some article online that tells you to be nice?

Are you kidding me?

I get it. That won’t work.

But wait….

What if you got inside their head and finally…

finallly…

understood where they were coming from?

And that it had nothing to do with you – even if they SAID it did?!

Find out tonight at 9 PM Eastern Time what the secret is to making your marriage better –

without discussing “the problems in our marriage”.

You have resentments. Of course you do. Who wouldn’t with the negligence, the dismissiveness, the insensitivity, the walking-out-of-the-room stuff you’ve put...

06/06/2024

5 Reasons People Cheat

Betrayal of love has to be one of the most painful forms of abuse anyone can inflict on another. Yet, people who cheat barely give a thought to the person they’re cheating on.

Why is that?

What is their motive?

Well, it’s more complex than you would have thought – and most of the time it has NOTHING to do with the person they’re cheating on.

Find out how that could be possible on Thursday, June 6, 2024 Eastern Time on Youtube.

Betrayal of love has to be one of the most painful forms of abuse anyone can inflict on another. Yet, people who cheat barely give a thought to the person th...

05/30/2024

What Are IFS and IFIO? - 6 Reasons For Their Profound Healing Potential

Has your marriage had –

Addictions?
Cheating?
Tempers?
Invalidation?
Ignorning, coldness?
Feeling like strangers?
Lost your “voice”?

Maybe you’d better attend the Live in just an hour+, at 9 PM Eastern time and find out the reason why IFS is the way to approach fixing the problem

Has your marriage had –Addictions?Cheating?Tempers?Invalidation?Ignorning, coldness?Feeling like strangers?Maybe you’d better attend the Live in just an hour...

05/15/2024

You're A Person, Not A Patient! (NEW LINK!!)

Regarding any client I’ve ever had, I can say with assurance that no matter how “bad” someone told me they were - they weren’t.

Not only that I didn’t find them “bad,” somehow, the person who told me they were bad “miraculously” had a positive new feeling about them by the end of therapy.

Well, now that I think about it, there were one or two exceptions. And you know what? The reason they were exceptions was because I didn’t get to really, deeply, know them.

Maybe they didn’t want me to.

Could be.

But the result points a finger to me, not them. Because had I persisted in the relationship with the attitude of wanting to know the truth about who they were, they would have eventually let me in.

The ones that are tough eventually do.

So why am I telling you this?

Because I’m going to let you in on my secrets for opening up the most difficult, “bad” people. The one you don’t want to be around.

The one you’re married to.

Find out in my LIVE Thursday, May 23, at 9 PM Eastern Time

Regarding any client I’ve ever had, I can say with assurance that no matter how “bad” someone told me they were - they weren’t.Not only that I didn’t find th...

05/14/2024

Finally, I've got Marriage Situation #18 up! It's a JOINT Therapy Session that you can peek into! ...What does a good therapist do when a client calls himself an idiot? This is a conjoint session with Larry & Cheryl. Find out how to turn something bad like that into healing.

What does a good therapist do when a client calls himself an idiot? This is a conjoint session with Larry & Cheryl. Find out how to turn something bad like t...

05/09/2024

11 Signs You've Experienced Trauma

You live a normal life. You’re functioning. Maybe even functioning well – you work at your work and if you must say, you’re doing well.

But there are little things in your life that for inexplicable reasons, get in your way of complete happiness.

Maybe it’s a history of trauma – even when your childhood seemed normal.

And hey – it probably was normal.

But that doesn’t mean you weren’t hurt.

Find out tonight at 9 PM Eastern time.

You live a normal life. You’re functioning. Maybe even functioning well – you work at your work and if you must say, you’re doing well. But there are little ...