MomTown

02/09/2020

EMOTIONAL WELLNESS IN THE PERINATAL PERIOD - 2/19/2020
On February 19th, join me and these two noodles ( and ) as we talk about the things we wish we knew before having babies, the gritty truth about perinatal mental wellness, why The Motherhood Center is such an important resource, and the reason behind our matching tattoos (spoiler alert: it’s about community). This evening will be moderated by psychotherapist Elizabeth Baron from The Motherhood Center of New York and drawing knowledge dropping topics from ’s book, "What No One Tells You". There will be snacks (super important)! There will be giveaways! There will be resources!
It's FREE and a great place for mingling with new parents and parents-to-be. RSVP in link or on Hatch NYC's website.
# mentalhealth @ HATCH Collection

07/18/2019

I'm taking a hiatus.

Growing up, I used to spend every summer at in central Maine. I made some of my best friends there - many of whom I am still close with. It was a magical place where at any given moment you could hear someone playing music in one of the many practice cabins scattered all over the campus. At every camp event, concert or gathering, we would end the evening singing a song titled "Peace, I ask of thee oh River" (The origins are either from Girl Scouts or Sacred Harp 🤷🏻‍♀️). I've sung this to my children at bedtime since my oldest was born. It's a wonderful meditation on how nature can provide character, strength, and courage. I'm hoping this proves true.

This is all to say my family and I recently relocated to rural Connecticut. We're leaving behind 22 years of friendships, memories, and experiences in NYC for two acres, a lot of wild mugwort🌱 and a 220-year-old cedar-sided farmhouse. I have big feelings about this (mostly because I'm totally scared of nature and think plants are weird). Over the past few weeks, I'm settling (grounding) here and I'm glad to be in a place that is expansive and wild. So much of my identity has been wrapped up in NYC...including my handle and website. NYC has been a third person in my relationship, the homeplace of my children, the playground of my youth. I have loved the community of birth professionals and will continue to connect and support parents in NYC - but I'm also finding it's time to help families closer to where I live now. I'm looking forward to seeing what happens.

PS. This post serves as a way to share that I'm now
@ Bethany, Connecticut

06/24/2019

The personal is political. Recently, I was filmed for the Today Show .com docuseries "Modern Motherhood". This series focuses on postpartum challenges like nursing, going back to work, pelvic floor issues and more. My segment, as you've probably guessed, is about postpartum mental health. Included in this segment are two women I love and a place I hold dear to my heart, The Motherhood Center of New York. I loved doing this piece and think the producers did a beautiful job surveying how three women experienced a very common (but not normal) postpartum issue.

While I wish the story was more about the state of postpartum care in America (and less my personal narrative) I'm very glad to be part of an ongoing conversation about perinatal mental health awareness and how poor mental health affects SO many women (and by proxy their babies). I think the heartbeat of my mission comes across in the piece: we must do better to support new parents and educate them about early postpartum and how challenging (and beautiful, and fun, and exhausting and unexpected...etc.) parenting can be.

However, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention the following:

1. I am a cis-gender, white woman. My privilege allows for my experience to be front and center and I am able to use my voice to demystify and destigmatize perinatal mental health. I recognize that my privilege keeps me safe from further harm and repression where mental health is concerned - (and at times even championed for shining a light on this subject). POC and LGBTQIA+ people suffer greater than white cis-women and are far less represented when it comes to being well-supported with appropriate mental health resources and documentation of their experiences. I will continue to share information and create awareness while acknowledging that we are not often including all people who require mental health care and support during the postpartum time period (aka FOREVER after having a baby).

2. That said, we should not require critical care to be cared for. While more and more focus is being given to postpartum care in America, we have a lot more work to do. We need more space and support for new parents to transition into parenting. This goes beyond being nurtured and nourished for the first forty days and requires us to examine healthcare, the pathology of birth, health equity, family leave policy, flexible work schedules, wage and investment gaps, universal childcare for parents, and reimbursement for postpartum support.

Thank you so much for watching this piece, sharing it with others and thinking about postpartum for the parents-to-be and new parents in your life. You do not have to parent in a silo and your mental state is as important as your physical healing. PSA over :)

05/22/2019

If mothers and fathers speak openly about child-care obligations, their colleagues will adapt.

05/21/2019

A few weeks ago I had coffee with my new friend . She graciously shared her knowledge and told me how “Mothering the New Mother” came about. I’d read the book a few years ago when it was on a book list but wanted to revisit it since we met. I just re-read it and it’s such a seminal piece of guidance and support for new parents (published at a time when people were thinking even less about the postpartum landscape than they are now!). Please check it out if you don’t know it!!

05/10/2019

My dearie dearest dear friend Sara wrote this beautiful piece for The Motherhood Center of New York. She's so talented and this story says so much about the many ways by which we come (in)to motherhood. I'm so proud to know her.

I was not supposed to be a mother.

05/06/2019

Really excited to support practitioners Dr. Laura Polania and Meredith Carlisle, LMSW from at Biggest Baby Show Ever tomorrow night at 7 pm. Our Postpartum Health + Wellness panel will be moderated by Paige Bellenbaum, founding Director at The Motherhood Center of New York. Please come say hello if you are attending - I'd love to meet you! ⁣⠀⁣⠀⁣⠀⁣⠀
⁣⠀

05/01/2019

It's World Maternal Mental Health Day!

So that means in a lot of ways it's MomTown's birthday. Today all over the world we are collectively raising awareness for disorder that can be unexpectedly impact 1 in 5 women, Maternal Mental Health disorders like postpartum depression/anxiety. I wrote about what this looked like for me yesterday but in honoring today, in this post I’d like to highlight what I’d change for new mothers. After being treated for PPA with my third baby I noticed the gaps in care for new parents and decided it was time to do something about it. Because support is social justice and mental health can mean mental wellness.

Here is what I’ve learned since beginning MomTown and what I’d like to change for new families:
🖤 Parenting in a silo is so unnatural - we have to help each other reclaim the parenting experience so that it's not done alone (*see Grandmother Hypothesis post). There are biological differences between how men and women respond to stress. Research shows that when women are managing stressful situations, instead of engaging “fight or flight” (adrenal response), they “tend and befriend” (release of oxytocin). More of this. 🖤 Mental wellbeing is part of having your basic needs met...evidence suggests that poor mental health is as impactful on your functions as diabetes, smoking, and obesity. You can't help your baby if you aren't well. 🖤 We face a future where caring for other people is going to be the norm - an unprecedented number of people are retiring and aging and needing to be cared for. Let's normalize care for all points in life and model nurturing behavior as a way by which to destigmatize the meaning of help and what asking for help looks like.

04/18/2019

Sharing some images from the MommyCon panel with Angelina Spicer, Dr. Jeff Brown The Motherhood Center of New York. Angelina is fully funded for her Postpartum Depression documentary but will still take donations: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/spicerspostpartumdoc/angelina-motherhood-and-postpartum-depression-doc !

04/18/2019

04/03/2019

Just putting this here. I’m so honored to support with Paige Bellenbaum from and at this Saturday. I’m passionate about revolutionizing care in the postpartum period. On Equal Pay Day, I want to make “the motherhood penalty” a distant memory for my children as part of how we revolutionize postpartum care and perinatal mental health. Because paid family leave and equal pay is mental health.

03/17/2019

W H A T H A P P E N S N E X T ??

My middle daughter has this magical way of asking me this question (adorably pictured above because, hello, algorithms). We have established a routine where we sit down and "talk about our day". She insists we go over each moment detail by detail, landing at the present minute. This always makes me giggle since the last thing we often say is to each other is, "and now we're here"...which always feels wonderfully meta.

I reflect on this question today after realizing it has been one year since MomTown was officially my full-time job...and the first time a job didn't actually feel like a job. I'm super proud of all the families I've supported, all the certifications I've started and completed, all the classes I've taken part in, and all the people I've met...but I'm excited to ask, WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?
🖤
1. More advocacy! working towards perinatal mental wellness for all families was my entry to this space and where I want to continue efforts. 👩🏻‍⚖️
2. More speaking and writing about perinatal mental health 👩🏻‍💻
3. More focus on postpartum care and how an educated and informed transition to parenthood can lead to a more secure mental space 🤱🏽
4. More teaching workshops and classes to prepare families for all options in pregnancy, birth and postpartum 👩🏼‍🏫
5. More attention to my school-work (gotta throw that in, the sooner I get done the sooner I can really move the train from the station)👩🏾‍🎓
6. More collaborations! More than anything, I have loved connecting with other birth practitioners, reproductive justice advocates, and parent connectors and I am here to do more of this 👯‍♀️
🖤
There is a lot coming down the pike for MomTown and I'm excited to share it as it evolves.

✨🖤And, now we're here!🖤✨