02/23/2021
Keys to meeting the 2021 goals! 💪🏻
Do not delay any longer!
We all set ourselves goals that will make us be better people, be healthier or perhaps better comply with "the fashion of the moment." Year after year the same song: if I quit smoking, if I do sports, if I learn English ... But no matter how sure and convinced you are that the new year is the final one, what usually happens is that the wishes of this year they end up becoming the purposes of the next, because it is always the same and in the end nothing is accomplished. In what failure? Why am I not able to achieve what I propose myself?
If you are one of those who makes a long list of objectives that later remain unrealized with good intentions, this article interests you.
Tips to meet your goals this 2020:
* Choose your goals according to your desires and genuine tastes: in years past the fashion was zumba or crossfit, now it seems that everyone has taken the bike and running. Year after year, society is suggesting to us what our hobbies, objectives and interests should be and of course, if all we want is to follow fashion, we will hardly be able to maintain the will in our projects. We have to stop for a moment and ask ourselves some simple (and at the same time complicated) questions: “What makes me happy?”, “What kind of person do I want to be?”, “What are my wishes if no one could see me? ”. Only when you find what it is that fulfills you, will you be able to carry it out. Running a marathon can be a blast if it's one of the things you genuinely want to do, but doing it for your Instagram photo can be hell. Value yourself and your individuality, your ideas are good if they satisfy you regardless of whether social networks agree or not. If you find the things that are part of you, surely they will be easier to bring to fruition.
* Discard things: we tend to make long lists of objectives, thinking that the year has many hours and days and that it will give us time for everything. This is the first big mistake.
WE CANNOT WITH EVERYTHING. Apart from our objectives, we also have to work, interact with other people, eat, etc. If your plan is something like this: “I'm going to study English for an hour a day, go to the gym every day for two hours, write a book, cook so I always take my tupperware to work with something healthy, learn to play the guitar, be the number one at work ... "or something like:" I get up at 6, go to the gym, take the children to school, work more than 8 hours, go out with my friends and I still have time for humanitarian actions, traveling and looking handsome / a ”is likely to end up failing. This prototype of off-road life often generates anxiety and sadness. If you intend to follow this model, you will most likely end up in a psychology consultation. "I don't get to everything", "I'm running all day", "I've lost my way, I don't know who I am", "I can't achieve my goals." Stop, breathe, think. Set only realistic goals according to the time you have (the real one, not the imaginary one). Discard things, think that it is better and more satisfactory to have two goals and meet them, than 10 and not achieve any (which will generate frustration and anger with yourself).
* Prioritize: Seeking perfection does not usually work. Choose the area that is most important to you and bet on that: children, work, body, health, personal relationships, training, etc. It does not mean that by choosing one you should give up all the others, but our strength and our time are limited and we cannot cover everything. Then decide whether to be very good at something (choose few goals) or do different things without having to stand out. Either of the two options is valid, as long as it is your own decision. And remember that there are several ways to reach the same goal.
* Little by little: If you are going to start a habit from scratch, you need to do it little by little, with love and respect for yourself. Telling yourself that you are fat and that you should start a diet, or wanting to start it in a radical way on January 8, will most likely end in failure, with a lot of frustration and with bad words towards yourself. Write your goals and divide them into smaller sub-goals, steps that will lead you to that new lifestyle you are looking for. Remind yourself that changes are long-term (a plan to know how to eat well your whole life is always better than a restrictive diet that makes you starve). Going little by little, without haste but without pause, is the only way to achieve it.
* The goal must be under your control, be precise and well organized: the problem is that many times we set goals that do not depend on us, we do not specify them properly, or we want to achieve them in any way. An example:
* Goal: "I want a partner"
* Search place: "bars, discos, maybe in the gym ... where it appears"
* The mistake: wanting to run a lot when someone "likes us", forming links very quickly without knowing the other, from the idealization.
Instead of this, which can be difficult because it depends on the other person liking you, it is tighter and the following objective is more within our control: "I am going to join groups where I can meet interesting people for me." If you don't like to party, meeting your partner in a bar may not be the most appropriate. Look for groups where you can expand your friendships, without becoming obsessed with love, otherwise you will choose people who do not suit you.
Other examples:
* Goal: "I want to have abs" is tighter "I will do sports weekly"
* Goal: “learn English” is more adjusted “I go to the academy on Thursdays in those two free hours that I have”.
More keys to achieve your goals for 2020
* Attach your new goals to something you like: It is what psychology is known as "positive reinforcement." If you achieve a goal, you reward yourself with something that you like. The most effective thing is to give yourself a reinforcer right after doing the behavior you want to achieve (never before). Let's think about how this works: If I want to lose a few kilos, the most likely thing is that I will become obsessed with doing it quickly and very surely, seeing that I do not get immediate results, I leave it and eat chocolate, which I love and that at that moment is more satisfactory. The human brain prefers a small immediate reward to a large reward that it must wait for, and that is why many of our purposes are so difficult to accomplish. Therefore, if your goal is long-term, you should give yourself “small rewards” (the reinforcers) that reward each step, so that little by little you get closer to the final goal.
* To avoid falling into temptation, run away from it and look for an alternative: if you want to quit smoking, it is not about putting a pack in front of you and holding on like a Spartan without trying any. The best thing is not to have ci******es at home and not to be with people who smoke, that is, not to be tempted around and something important: to have an alternative and incompatible activity with smoking. The same with food: if you do not buy products that make you fat when you make the purchase, it is easier not to consume them. And if you also surround yourself with people who eat healthy and go to the gym regularly, then the better. And this is applicable to anything you want to modify.
* A failure is not the end of your project: you have to tell in advance that this new objective is going to have good and bad moments. That is to say, there will be days when you “fail”, when you cannot carry out the routine that you have proposed yourself (you will eat a hamburger, you will not write on your blog even if it is the day to do it, you will not go to the gym ...), but this it's just a stumble. If a child learning to ride a bicycle falls, it does not occur to us to tell him that he does not know and cannot. He hasn't lost the ability to ride a bike, he just fell. So why are we not able to be this understanding of ourselves? If one day you do not meet your goal, remember that the road is long, it does not mean that you should give up or that you have failed. Rest, change the routine that day, and get back to work. Rome was not built in a day…
* To plan: Now that you know what your genuine goals are and the time you have to do it, define them clearly. Pen and calendar or agenda in hand, write how, when and where you are going to fulfill your 2018 resolutions. Ask yourself questions like: What things do I need? Do I have enough money? What things am I going to give up for this? What do I get in return? Can someone join me to motivate us more? And when you finally have it well defined, you just have to go for it.
