Mind Mastery Counseling - Mark Gruber LMHC CAP

10/13/2025

Today's world is vividly in flux! Is life creating challenges? Could you use a little help getting through the many choices confronting you? Maybe you just need someone to talk to about work, personal relationships, family, or just finding your personal Zen!

You are not alone! Seeking therapy is the first step in getting unstuck from a problem – the first step in getting relief quickly. Finding someone who listens is one of the best ways to find calm. I want all of my clients to feel understood, to know that I can relate to you, and be reassured that I have a good sense of what you are going through. I will help you find answers as you progress in therapy.

In recovery? Still guessing what’s next, what’s okay, what’s not? You do not have to do this alone. You have found the right therapist! I share personal knowledge from my own path in recovery so you can relate. Let me help you find comfort and confidence through your recovery journey, one step at a time.

Sometimes all is takes is someone to talk to, someone with an objective point of view. The most important thing I can do is help you understand why you are where you are, what you want to change, and how to reach your goals for a better you.

Why go it alone? I have been where you are, and I can show you how to get where you want to be. Let’s talk.

03/28/2023

People often want to know why addicts say and do the things they do. I can say it's been a unique experience to be both an addict in recovery and a therapist who has worked in substance abuse treatment for so long. In many ways it seems strange that family members want to try and make reason of why a person would engage in a behavior that doesn't have to make sense and never really will, but I also understand that in order really understand the pull of addiction, you'd need to be an addict and no addict would wish that upon their nonaddicted loved ones. Nonetheless, since I see and hear these dilemmas constantly, I thought I chime in with how an addict processes these types of statements from their family/loved ones. Not saying any of these statements make sense, but since family members seem to always want to know....

Statements I've heard from family members of addicts and some of the internal response of the addict:

"You love drugs/alcohol more than your family" / "I don't understand why it's a choice! I don't even use because of you. In fact, you are one of the only things that makes me not want to use. I'm scared if I stopped using, you still wouldn't love me and you'd see I'm a screw up even without this excuse. You are too good for me and I will just keep drinking/using until you see it too. I don't deserve you or this relationship or this family so it doesn't matter. I need to drink and use just to show up and be present for you and the family at all. I don't know how to show feelings without drugs/alcohol so making it an either or situation is unfathomable."

"You are stupid. Every time you do well, you have to mess it up!" / "Every time I do well, it seems I have room to do what my mind/body really wants, so I think it's possible to get away with it during the good times. It take so much effort to put things back together again after I mess them up, so by the time I'm done fixing things, I want to reward myself so badly and they way I do it is to use. If I just kept doing good all the time without picking up, then I'd have to grow up all the way and that is scary. I'm not sure I'm ready for that responsibility. I'm a screw up anyhow, I mess up period. What else is new?"

"I know you have potential but it's all wasted when you wont stop using!" / "I've heard I have potential all my life. This sounds familiar. I guess I am a tragic story of could have been, should have been but just a tragic waste. More examples of me screwing everything up. I'm such a piece of crap. I need to drinkand use to deal with this. If I stop drinking and really really try at life, that will require more effort than I think I have left in me. What if this potential people see in me is really not there? I am scared to find out what potential I might have. I would rather have a bunch of people tell me what potential I have while I drink as opposed to actually trying and finding out maybe I don't have as much potential as they thought."

"I'm scared to leave him/her because what if they FINALLY sober up and then it already dumped them?" / "I don't understand why they stay with me to begin with. If I got sober, they would just find something else to be angry at me. I'm scared I might not love them or want them If I sobered up. I mess up everyone's life I get involved with. They would be better off without me....I need to drink/use because I'm messing up everything and I just want to forget about it temporarily"

"Everything gets blamed on me. I'm tired of being the reason he/she drink or uses!" / "I'm angry. I'm angry that I can't stop. I'm angry that I can't do things right. I'm angry that I have a ball and chain shackled to me. Don't they see I know the answer is me? I'm just so fed up with myself. I don't mean to be such a jerk but I feel so crappy about myself. If they knew how pathetic and weak I was, they would dump me. I'm not an idiot, I know when I'm messing up but it just pi**es me of when they say it all the time."

"Why can't he/she just see how much better life would be if he/she stopped?" / "Here we go again. I'm the reason for you not being happy and for us not having a good life. Everything is my fault. Life sucks and it would probably just suck without getting high or drunk then. Yeah, life might be better, but what if it's not? Every time I stop using, I feel like life sucks so I just use again. I don't believe you. That might be true but I can't figure out how to stop so I guess knowing life would be better doesn't matter because I can't stop and I'm destined to have a bad life because of it."

"It's like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde when he drinks/uses. I never know which personality I'm going to get" / "I'm the same person all the time. I just don't watch what I say as much when I'm drinking or using. I'm so messed up, I just know how to hide it better when I'm sober. Mr. Hyde is probably the real me. I'm a monster - If I stopped drinking/using and they saw me act like that, then they would know it's not the drugs/alcohol and I'm just a horrible person. They are allowed to have moods and act crazy but when I do it, it gets call Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde!"

**So what is the addict and their family member to do? Well, therapy helps bridge the gap and improve communication but ultimately everyone is best off taking care of themselves. Addicts don't use because of their family and Alanon would tell you this also. Appropriate 12 step meetings are a great resource for the addict and for the family, but sometimes counseling can help as an additional resource.

https://provider.growtherapy.com/book-appointment?id=9079&ref=prov

03/22/2023

When is a good time to start over or start anew? The answer to that question is now. A lot of people wonder if they are too old to chase certain dreams, to start a new career, to find love, to change old habits, or to just reinvent themselves. The older I get, the more I come to realize that human beings never stop growing and we never lose the need and desire to change and find new challenges to conquer and new ways to find meaning in life.

With spring being a time for new beginnings, it's apparent that change is in the air all around us. Many people talk about all the things they want to change, feel they can't, or resign themselves to a life they don't really want. Why settle? While it's cliche to say "you only live once," the statement rings true. Sometimes therapy can help get the ball rolling towards the new life you might want.

Investing in therapy is putting energy and effort into the changes you want in your life. Once you start the process, you already have "skin in the game" and are making active steps towards the life you imagine. Spring is in the air, the time for growth and change is now!

To look into therapy for yourself or a loved one email me at grubermark@hotmail.com or book at

https://provider.growtherapy.com/book-appointment?id=9079&ref=prov

01/28/2023

New Profile in Psychology Today:

Is life creating challenges? Could use a little help getting through the many choices confronting you? Maybe you just need someone to talk to about work, personal relationships, family, or just finding your personal Zen! You are not alone! Seeking therapy is the first step in getting unstuck from a problem – the first step in getting relief quickly. Finding someone who listens is one of the best ways to find calm. I want all of my clients to feel understood, to know that I can relate to you, and be reassured that I have a good sense of what you are going through. I will help you find answers as you progress in therapy.
In recovery? Still guessing what’s next, what’s okay, what’s not? You do not have to do this alone. You have found the right therapist! I share personal knowledge from my own path in recovery so you can relate. Let me help you find comfort and confidence through your recovery journey, one step at a time.
Sometimes all is takes is someone to talk to, someone with an objective point of view. The most important thing I can do is help you understand why you are where you are, what you want to change, and how to reach your goals for a better you. Why go it alone? I have been where you are, and I can show you how to get where you want to be. Let’s talk.

12/22/2022

Loving the private practice so far. Any word of mouth recommendations or leads greatly appreciated!

11/20/2022

Taking clients through Grow Therapy. Credentialed with a few insurances (United, Optum, UMR, Cigna) already. See links:

https://provider.growtherapy.com/book-appointment?id=9079&ref=prov

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/mark-w-gruber-oakland-park-fl/274650

The Grow Therapy web portal

01/24/2018

Make your Life Great! Part 2

These are random musings from what I have learned over several years in recovery and my own experiences in personal therapy for me and in working with others as a counselor:

Choose happiness.

This line of thinking is what the 12 steps gave me. It set me free from my addiction to suffering, negativity, chaos, crappy relationships, and alcohol. Strive for freedom and happiness not muddling by miserably.

And this isn’t necessarily all about your relationships, substance use patterns, or outside things going on in your life. It’s about how you think, how you value yourself, and how you approach life in general.

12 step programs and therapy do not change anyone else but you...Support from others who know your pain is great, but staying in pain is your choice and that is where recovery and change gets challenging and scary, but where it is most rewarding if you face your fears and do the work on yourself.

01/23/2018

At 33 and now at 45. If you don't think you can make changes to make your life better, think again. You CAN change from the inside out!

01/18/2018

Make your Life Great!

These are random musings from what I have learned over several years in recovery and my own experiences in personal therapy for me and in working with others as a counselor:

Choose happiness. Don't settle for less than you want in life. Accept things you can't change, but don't forget to change the things you can and want to. Remember you have choices and can choose to not be miserable. You and your Higher Power or “God” are the ones who matter most in your life. Other people have their own Higher Power and it is not you. Go be happy today or at least take steps in that direction. This is your life and your Higher Power wants you to enjoy it, not suffer all the time.