10/11/2018
people in the church often say there are two reasons for discontinuance of a marriage or divorce. This is not true, and I speak from the scriptures that must be looked at with not even much common sense to realize this. Aside from fornication/adultery (which is constantly done outside of marriage for this does not mean to cheat it means relations outside of marriage) which i may add does not come from a marriage license, but the blood covenant created by God with Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden specifically mentions that Adam knew (had in*******se with) Eve and was teh marital consummation. Her broken h***n in my understanding is an eternal covenant a blood covenant just like God does so often with eternal agreements! Anyhow nothing is black and white with God. He is not one or two dimensional. He is not human and there are verses of scripture that not only pertain to marriage, but also the human and spiritual body which is a half of a marriage that in tune to Gods ways become a single body both in body physically and spirit (which again I add is the act of sexual in*******se when two become literally one being no seperation in them). One must ask if the body is the temple and it is being physically abused, considering God does not want the temple defiled, this would not be God's will. Another thing is in marriage often children arrive, it is completely impossible to obey the command of God in training up a child in the way he should go, if he constantly witnesses his earthly father disrespect his mother, emotionally, mentally, physically, sexually and or spiritually. The reason is because a child is trained by his parents whether they intend to train or not, the child will learn and become his mother, father, a combination of the two, or take after who raised the child if not one of the kids parents.
The route to truly avoid all of this is when making Jesus LORD of our lives to truly do just that, make him LORD he mentioned in scripture that people would call him LORD, but do not the things he said. We are told not to be unequally yoked together while this isn't limited to marriage, it absolutely includes it. Have you ever as a believer been bonded or unequally yoked in business, perhaps with a greedy person, or someone who just outright isn't chosing Christ as their own LORD, notice the business didn't survive, because this is disobedience to the LORD. Marriage would obviously be the most important case for the LORD to make this point again children must be considered and being unequally yoked in marriage, has grave consequences for the raising/ training of the children especially if its the father who is called (not the woman) to be the spiritual head of household. People have often chosen someone that God has not to be married to and have lived entire lives full of grief and misery because of this, not to mention their children were put through hell and generational curses last many years often occur from this as well unless Jesus is being sought after so healing can take place and break this cycle of bo***ge, creating a new cycle since behold he makes us new creatures and all things new.
HOwever sometimes two people are lost and after they marry, one gets to know Jesus before the other or when the other never does. In this case, people were not trained up or raised in Christ themselves or have walked away and are returning, and believers are born of the spirit none the less a newborn is an infant baby who must learn everything from scratch and like babies they will fall, need picked up, make messes of things, and need help cleaning them up, they will resist the discipline and go through alot sometimes before they truly surrender or know enough of scripture and applly those principles therein to see change in their lives. There is a reason for ending marriage that is not death (scripture states that one is only bound by the law as long as he lives) but remember this the by the works of the law shall no man be saved for the letter (of the law only brought death) while the spirit was and always will be what brings life (everlasting and physical peace as well). There is a scripture for this and it only involved the unbeliever desiring to leave the marriage, not the believer if you take it at face value. One of the problems when dealing with domestic abuse in a Christian context is, “What does the Bible says about divorce for domestic abuse?” I believe the Bible allows divorce for domestic abuse, and the key text for this is 1 Corinthians 7:15 – But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bo***ge in such cases. For God has called us to peace.This verse has been generally assumed to relate to desertion: when an unbelieving spouse walks out, abandoning a marriage with a Christian spouse, but not legally divorcing them. However, in the Greek text the word “depart” (chorizo) means “to place space between, to separate” and it was one of the standard terms for legal divorce in the first century. Typically, perpetrators of abuse do not walk out of their marriages – they want to stay in the relationship because they enjoy the power, privilege and control they obtain therein. So the victim of abuse thinks this verse does not apply to her. However, when correctly understood, it is the verse which gives her freedom.
In the book Not Under Bo***ge: Biblical Divorce for Abuse, Adultery and Desertion is defined domestic abuse as a pattern of conduct by one spouse which is designed to obtain and maintain power and control over the other spouse. It always includes emotional and verbal abuse and may also include financial abuse, social abuse (restricting the victim’s contact with family and friends), sexual abuse, physical violence, and spiritual abuse such as twisting scriptures to justify the abuse. Abusers who never use physical violence (and there are many) are still very frightening and controlling to their victims. Post-separation, many of these abuses may continue, with the added element of legal abuse leading to protective mothers sometimes losing custody of their children to the abuser.
The perpetration of domestic abuse effectively pushes away the other spouse and divides the marriage. The fact that many victims eventually leave abusive relationships testifies to this pushing away. Perpetrators usually protest that they want the marriage to continue, but their evil conduct conveys the exact opposite – it effectually pushes the opposite spouse away.
When applying 1 Corinthians 7:15, the key question is not “Who walked out?” but “Who caused the separation?” Would it be sensible to say that David was the sinful rebellious one when he left Saul’s court? No, he left because of Saul's abuse. David left, but Saul was the cause of his leaving. If we translate the word chorizo as “separate” we see this more clearly: if the unbeliever separates, let him separate. The unbeliever is doing the separating; the believer is commanded to let it be done. This tells the believing spouse (and the church) to allow the marriage to be over, because the unbeliever has destroyed the covenant. It permits the victim of abuse to take out a legal divorce. Let there be chorizo = let there be separation = let there be legal divorce, because the word chorizo means both separation and divorce.
In Not Under Bo***ge I also show that since the brother or sister is not under bo***ge, the victim of abuse is free to remarry a new partner (unlike the instance in 1 Cor. 7:10-11 where marriage to a new partner was forbidden)
What if the abuser is a professing Christian?
1 Corinthians 7:15 only applies to marriages where the opposite spouse is a nonbeliever. An abuser who professes to be a Christian typically resists the call to repentance, either by overtly fighting against having to take responsibility for his abusive behavior, or by counterfeiting repentance to get the admonishers off his back and make them think he is really changing. With counterfeit repentance, the change is only superficial: the abuser has not relinquished his belief that he is entitled to exert power and control over those he chooses to oppress. No-one could be a true Christian and engage in months/years/decades of coercive control and cruelty towards their spouse. Such conduct is anathema to Christ.
In conclusion, I personally feel the seriousness with which Christ feels on marriage is due to the spiritual aspect of it with him being the bridegroom married to the church (his bride) who he promised he would never leave nor forsake! She can leave him (the church can walk away but he never will) Do not be conflicted within yourself or listen to lies of the enemy consiering what you have done or failed to do. Its irrelevant. Ye are saved by GRACE through FAITH alone. Hell is not where people who sin go, it is where people who reject Jesus go. Jesus knows your heart and as you seek him and truly desire to learn his ways, he will show htem to you either through his word, other believers and teachers, or completely supernaturally with no physical explanation when he really decides to show off which i absolutely love!!!!!
Just some food for thought check out this old testament situation for marriage the jews were divided into land except the levites who were given the levitical priesthood (now mind you these rules and laws don't hinder God from doing what he pleases hahaha Jesus who was not from the tribe of levi, but the tribe of Judah rent the veil in twin becoming our final ultimate highpriest forever and him living in us gives us total access to God no longer does a priest have to go on our behalf for our sin, Jesus took care of that. He loves us and freely forgives us of all, he desires to grow us into content, loving (holding no account of wrongs done to us no matter how harsh because were human and have done it too) peaceful creatures who literally experience heaven on Earth. Those who truly trust God experience constant supernatural activity this comes from relying on God rather than men including doctors, lawyers, whatevers hahahaha giving things over to him changes peoples hearts, minds, lawsuits get dropped, things get healed without mans assistance i only had a huge lump on my neck for weeks and refused to see any doc besides the great physical he took care of it too!
Okay to end this I just want to say God honors and loves marriage, he created the institution of it, and desires it to be forever, however if we fail at this he does forgive there is not a special place in hell for divorced people. Hell is for Jesus rejectors. Heaven is for believers not for the perfect. Have you read the bible? Seen some of the lives and sins those people lead. They were thieves, murderers, liars, trouble makers, deniers of Christ, they cursed, drank, etc etc. I believe when we accept Christ he changes us and over time NOT over night as we grow in him (we can't just stop sinning in our own efforts Paul said so in romans) but through him all things truly are possible and i have learned not only are they possible but likely. So next time you hear someone trying to put God in a box, or tell you what he does or does not expect, accept, forgive, tolerate, remember he is supernatural and he does what he wants. Guess what he wants to do? He wants to love and forgive you and nothing you do or fail to do will ever change that!!!!! Seek him with your whole heart and you will find him and be changed forever! The change is solely love i say that bravely and conclusively! This is the only change he puts in every person, it is that love alone that makes all the other changes follow! Please know that what he desires more than anything is for no one to perish and that is his heart and those who truly follow him can't passively live life with souls nowhere in mind, his love moves you to action, because its not a feeling as weve been tricked into believing its a verb and its powerful, and it is what faith is fueled by and does not work apart from and even the very faith we believe him with is a gift from him! I can't wait for the marriage supper!!
