11/05/2026
When a parent tells me “we tried what you said and it WORKED” - here’s usually what they did differently 👇
They stopped trying to talk their child out of the feeling.
Instead of “you’re okay, calm down” - they got close, got quiet, and said “I see you. This is hard. I’m right here.”
They stopped matching their child’s energy.
When their kid escalated, they went slower. Softer. Lower. Because a dysregulated child cannot co-regulate with a dysregulated adult.
They stopped focusing on the behavior and started asking what’s underneath it.
Hitting, screaming, shutting down, these aren’t personality problems. They’re communication.
They’re a nervous system that doesn’t have the skills yet to handle a big feeling.
And when parents start responding to the NEED instead of reacting to the BEHAVIOR?
Everything shifts.
The meltdowns don’t disappear overnight. But they get shorter. Less intense. And you stop feeling like you’re white-knuckling through every hard moment.
This is the work. And it’s learnable. :)
If you’re in the thick of it right now - the hitting, the tantrums, the “nothing is working” - you are not failing. You just haven’t had the right tools yet.
Follow along and I’ll keep showing up with the tools that actually help 🤍
xoxo, Miss Devann
