Garner Counseling Service

Garner Counseling Service Allowing the past to heal for a brighter tomorrow. You are not alone

08/15/2025
06/18/2025

I hear His still small voice behind me,
whispering ‘this is the way walk in it’.

My feet are led to where I need to be even when
I am unaware of it happening. His voice is gentle
soft and steady and yet I still hear it above the noise
of the world and life happening around me.

He has held me and led me through the depths
of the waters and as the flames of the fire have
surrounded me they never once set me ablaze.

He has been patient with me as
I have walked the path of His will.

He has had compassion
as I have fought against it.

He has given me the grace
when I had no strength to keep going.
He has remained faithful when I
wasn’t and held on to me so
that I would not fall.

His will and His plans have not gone
the way I had hoped or planned.

There were steps I didn’t see coming,
and yet He did.
Nothing has been a surprise to Him,
He has had every season and
day accounted for.

His mercy has crossed out the plans of the enemy
and redemption has been factored in.

He saw it all from the end to the beginning.
My story, my journey, my faith becoming pure.
He knew the roads I must travel and
the storms I must
endure so that I could learn to
live a surrendered life.

He has kept records of my tears and
sorrows and knows the good things
they will produce in my heart
and life.

He sees the glory to come and
He gently leads me to see it too.

Even when I don’t know where I am
headed my Shepherd does.
And because of that I need not fear.
He has good things in store for
me because He loves me.

He may lead me to places
I didn’t see coming
but it is all part of my story,
to learn to rely on Him solely
and trust where He says to go.

He whispers, don’t fear and I learn
to keep my eyes on Him
and because His Spirit is with
me I know I can go wherever He leads.

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A Heart Full of Hope

06/01/2025

May God bless you and all those you come in contact with today.🙏💜🙌 Here’s a thought for us all to remember:

“And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’”
(‭‭Matthew‬ ‭25‬:‭40‬)
🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵
“for I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in; I was naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison and you came to Me.’”
(‭‭Matthew‬ ‭25‬:‭35‬-‭36‬)

06/01/2025

Jesus reminds us in John 16:33 that the world will bring us tribulation but in Him we have peace, calm, and reassurance.

Apart from Him, there will be struggles. In Him we will have peace in the midst of these struggles.

We can't control the world, but we can control Who we turn to when it all feels like too much.

Pray with me:
Lord, help remind my heart you have overcome this world and there is peace in you no matter what is going on around me. The hope you bring gives us the peace our soul needs. Jesus, you are always my peace, and I am so grateful.

05/04/2025

I have a mind that likes replay mistakes or I believe it's my job to fix someone or something.

I'm learning balance between being of service to others and trying to change or control outcomes.

That's the tricky part for me and why I have to seek out wise counsel from people who are also working on themselves.

Michelle
© Wakingupfree


05/04/2025

People always say it's normal for a baby to be attached to their mom. But the moment a toddler clings to her, suddenly people start calling them spoiled.

Here’s the truth.

That toddler isn’t spoiled. They feel safe. They trust her. She’s their anchor in a world that feels big and unpredictable.

Toddlers don’t have many ways to feel powerful or in control, so they cling to what feels steady. That’s not something to correct. That’s something to honor.

If your child only wants you, it’s not a failure on your part. It’s proof that you’ve created a space where they feel most secure.

And that’s a beautiful thing.

04/06/2025

💥❤️✨

04/06/2025

I'm independent, feeling free. I met someone who’s incredible. He’s older, he’s smart, and he treats me like a lady. He tells me that I’m beautiful, wise; he loves my outlook on life. I know I don’t have to think it but, hypothetically, if he hit me, I would leave him.
He treats me so much better than I’ve ever been treated before. He really notices me, he compliments me, he’s texting me constantly. He’s mature, he’s smarter, and he would never hurt me. He never would, but of course, if he hit me, I would leave him.

We connect on a level that’s hard to describe. He really gets me, he wants the same things in life. For the first time I feel completely understood. I’m feeling full of hope and excitement, he says he is too! He feels the same way as I do! It couldn’t possibly happen, not in a million years, but if a man hit me, I would leave him.

He says he loves me! That’s a bit quick. Wants to move in together? We’ve only been dating one month. But now, I’ve offended him, what am I doing? I may never find another soul mate like him. Ok, I’ll do it, I love you too. He won’t hit me, but if he did, I would leave him.

Living together, he seems a bit distant, I wonder what’s wrong. I try to make him feel better, but nothing’s working. I try all the things he usually likes; make the house spotless, cook a nice meal, try and talk to him and show him I care. But he won’t open up; maybe I’ve done something, but what? We were so good before, I’ll try and make this work, but of course, if he hit me, I’d leave him.

Things have changed, when did that happen? He gets so angry, his eyes seem possessed. Shouting and raging like I’ve never seen before. And then he’s so cold, not just distant, but silent. Sometimes for days he will ignore my existence. I beg him to forgive me, but I’m not sure what for. Suddenly things are ok again, I see the old him. If I just stop messing up he will stop getting mad. But, if he hits me, I will leave him.

It’s so sweet how I’m so naive, he says. I guess it’s true, he’s smarter than me. I want to meet up with friends but he tells me he’s hurt. Don’t I ever think about how it makes him feel, he says. He has no friends nearby but I want to meet up with mine, he says. I guess it’s true, I’m selfish too. I say sorry and stay at home watching TV in silence with him. Still, if he hits me, I think I will leave him.

We’re moving. He will feel less stressed living near his family again. I ask if it’s ok to meet up with friends before we leave. Are you sure that’s a good idea, he says. He points out how I abandoned my friends when we started dating and my friends are probably mad. He’s right! I’ve been a terrible friend! I won’t text them. I’m so lucky he loves me with all of my flaws. If he hit me, I guess I would leave him.

We’ve moved away now. I feel so alone. He works long hours. I feel less tense when he’s not home but I miss him terribly and I’m waiting on him. I hear the key in the lock. I’m excited but my anxiety rises because I don’t know what mood he will be in. He seems ok, I try to cuddle on the sofa, but he tuts and says he’s tired and I’m needy. I feel hollow and I long for his love. If he hit me, I guess I might leave him.

His friends are over. I like it when his friends are here because he is more affectionate towards me. He tells them he’s proud of me. They say how we are such a great couple, when will we get married? I see that look in his eye and when his friends leave, WHY THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT? I panic, maybe he will leave me this time, and I feel utter despair. If he hit me, I’m not sure I’d leave him.

We plan a daytrip, we don’t have them often. I try to get everything right from the start so that things go smoothly. He’s annoyed because I take too long to get out of the house, but I think it’s ok. But there’s traffic and I begin to get anxious. He starts to drive really close to the cars, surely he knows I hate that, but I dare not say anything. He SHOUTS and SWEARS and my heart sinks, I’m in trouble now. Just try to be invisible, not to make it worse. If he hit me, I don’t know if I’d leave him.

It’s been like this a while now. He says that I’m too sensitive. If I don’t like him how he is, he says I can leave, I know where the door is. He says he wouldn’t try and stop me. But I’ve got nowhere to go, and I’m worth nothing. He is nice to me sometimes, maybe often, it all seems a blur. I can’t make sense of it anymore. Maybe I am too sensitive, it’s probably me. If he hit me, I don’t think I’d leave him.

Something big has happened, the rages seem to get bigger. He started throwing things because I make him so angry. He says he will call the police if I touch his things, or he will hurt me if I don’t listen. He’s been telling lies, I see that now. Lies about money, his life and me. I feel numb. I feel like I’m broken. If he hit me, the pain would at least make sense, but he hasn’t and that’s not the reason I’m leaving.

I left him. I feel stripped down, beaten, exhausted, lost, but I escaped and for that I feel free. But my mind remains imprisoned, I have suffered trauma, and it’s a long journey to recovery. Was it abuse? I tell them it was. Well, what did he do? they ask. I explain, but what am I really explaining, it doesn’t sound like much when my pain is so engulfing. Well, they say, it doesn’t sound great, but at least he didn’t hit you.

- Emma Rose Byham

04/06/2025

I was a gray area drinker. That weird middle space between occasional drinker and can't function without alcohol.

I thought that as long as I could take breaks between the drinking; as long as I could abstain when I had to, I was OK.

I was safe.

The problem with gray area drinking is you never know which way it's going to go. Some nights I could easily moderate. Other nights, that first sip lit a fuse in me. I felt insatiable. 1, 2, 3 drinks later... I wanted to get wasted. There was no desire to stop.

It was Russian roulette. I tried to moderate every time I drank, but I couldn't. Some nights I would be fine. Other nights, I would drink til I blacked out or ran out of booze.

In my 20's, I could get away with the occasional blackout, but as a mom? How could I possibly take this risk? And the guilt and frustrations would consume me.

I felt like a horrible mom. I would never forgive myself if something happened to my kids and I was too drunk to function, or wake up, or drive them to the hospital.

As I got older, even the nights I could effectively 'moderate' left me feeling disheveled in the morning, with a headache and brain fog. I realized I was playing a game where there was no winner. And the potential risks could cost me and my family everything.

There is a freedom in realizing that the only solution is to quit drinking altogether. Freedom from the constant head games, the guilt and self-disgust. There's a freedom to understanding that alcohol is really a ball and chain strapped to your ankle and you are holding the key.

If you are a gray area drinker. If you are constantly see-sawing between moderating and losing control, I challenge you to take the ball and chain off. Use the key in your hand.

And feel the freedom of no longer having to play the game.

A game where no one wins anyway.
***
Art by Giselle Dekel Illustrations

03/02/2025

Things that fill a child's inclusion cup:
* Feeling welcome & a sense of belonging
* Celebrating their uniqueness
* Friendship
* Receiving support to participate fully
* Focussing on their abilities & strengths
* Giving them a voice when they need it
* Feeling safe
* Experiencing kindness & acceptance
* Feeling seen, heard & understood
* Meaningful participation without barriers
* Ability to be their authentic selves without judgement
* Feeling important & valued
Credit: Diversity Kids

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