07/18/2025
Could you tell me what I should do now?
Your mental health and well-being are vital! During this unprecedented time, there is so much hate and unrest in the US. The time we now live in is terrifying and has altered our lives. Unfortunately, in some respects, our lives may be changed forever. Saying that we live in abnormal times fails to adequately convey the uncertainty, fear, desperation, hopelessness, and feeling of inadequacy that we now face. We hurt, we cry, we feel desperate, and in the pits of our despair, we do not know how to ease our pain. On the other hand, we live in fear that our parents, our children, our friends, our colleagues, or we will be the next to be afflicted with job loss, natural disasters, deportation, and the loss of benefits (e.g., Medicaid, Medicare, and Social Security). The loss of freedoms that we once took for granted. Some of us will be financially destroyed and possibly homeless. The stress we are experiencing is unlike anything our lives have prepared us for. Therefore, whatever you feel is NORMAL for these ABNORMAL times! The knowledge of our daily routines, which gave us comfort, a feeling of safety, and security, has been disrupted by the unknown. Some of you have lost everything! My community has been devastated by a horrible tornado; the devastation was less than a block from me. Are you in panic mode?
Consequently, so many individuals are trying to make sense out of nonsense. Some individuals believe they have a safety net, only to realize that their safety is being jeopardized. Worrying has never solved the unknown. Unfortunately, worrying increases your cortisol levels (a steroid hormone associated with stress). It causes all types of havoc on your body (e.g., pain, anxiety, poor sleep, sugar cravings, high blood pressure, and a big gut). More importantly, worrying creates overwhelming feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. I had a manager once tell me, “Don’t come with a problem—come with a solution for what you perceive as the problem. Do you have any suggestions? Here are some of my suggestions:
1) Structure your life. Create a routine to enhance your mind, body, and spirit. Have a regular bedtime and wake-up time. Learn to be consistent!
2) Create a hustle or a business. What can you do to make legal money? Sell some of the items you're not using. Rent out a room. Please do what you've got to do to make it. Do what you love, and hopefully, the money will follow. How can you make passive income?
3) Avoid taking people, places, and things for granted. I wake up with a grateful heart. I’m grateful for even clean water. I’m thankful for everything—the good, the bad, and the ugly.
4) Dream. Imagine that you went to bed and woke up the next morning, and everything was perfect. Picture it—what would that picture look like? Then make a plan to take proactive steps in making your ideal dream a reality!
5) Tell your child a bedtime story. “Once upon a time, __________ (your child’s name) lived…” Describe their day, how you kept them safe and loved. Fill the bedtime story with several positive affirmations.
6) Develop a group of like-minded individuals and get together (e.g., once a month or once a quarter), and discuss the unlimited changes and what you can do as a group to make changes in your homes, your communities, your state, and your nation. Develop a grassroots plan and execute the plan. Learn to advocate for what you want and need. You have to learn to rescue yourself because no one is coming. It’s time for reality to step into view!
7) Improve communication. Consequently, tech has weakened our communication skills. When was the last time you spoke to someone personally, looked them in their eyes, and had a serious talk? When was the last time you said the words, “I love you?” Learn to say, “I love you” to those who deserve your love without fear of rejection or shame. Learn to call a person when he or she crosses your mind.
8) Reconnect! Write letters, call, or text people who have been out of your life due to your inconsistent schedules. It is time to reconnect and recharge your relationships. I have reconnected with a childhood friend whom I hadn’t seen in 40 years. It seems like we were never separated. I feel like I have come full circle.
9) Learn something new! This is a great time to learn a new language or how to play the piano. Learn something that challenges your fear. For example, my goal is to learn how to swim because I have a fear of water outside of a shower or a tub. When you learn to face your fears and do it anyway, it is so empowering.
10) Read! Especially look at history and see how historically individuals have dealt with similar situations. You started your life off fighting. You fought as a s***m getting to that egg to create you! You are a warrior, not a victim or survivor. Acknowledge the warrior blood in you and not only survive but thrive.
11) Exercise, exercise, exercise. Get off the sofa and move your body! You can march in place during the commercials, go up and down the stairs, walk outside, go on YouTube, and play an exercise video. You can exercise for free!
12) Call, text, or e-mail. Zoom in and see your dear and devoted friends and family digitally. Zoom accounts are free.
13) Cherish each and every moment. Seize every second! Thank your partner, children, and others for being in your life! Eliminate those who drain your life’s energy, money, and resources. You can live without them! I don’t care who they are.
14) Recognize the difference between caution and crazy. Some individuals have become erratic and are exhibiting bizarre behaviors. Remain cautious but don't let fear take over during these uncharacteristic times! Fear can be paralyzing!
15) Eat a balanced diet, remain hydrated, and take daily vitamins (e.g., multivitamin, Vitamin D3, Vitamin C, B complex vitamin, Magnesium, and Zinc). Drink ginger, green, or turmeric teas to decrease the inflammation (pain) in your body.
16) Monitor your alcohol intake because you cannot drink your troubles away! Avoid self-destructive and risky behaviors. Staying drunk is a slow and grueling su***de.
17) If you become preoccupied with death, dying, or violence, reach out and dial 800-715-4224 Crisis Hotline.
18) Journal and explore your feelings—it’s time to take a close & honest look at yourself. Identify what you like and dislike about yourself. Acknowledge what you have control over and what you are powerless over. The only thing you can control is you—your thoughts, your feelings, and your actions. You have the power over you.
19) Take a News fast and a social media fast because the sensationalism can exacerbate depression and anxiety. It can lead you to do mindless strolling all day. Then, you look around, and your day is gone. You don’t lose time—you lose life!
20) Cook from scratch! Avoid processed foods, as they can increase inflammation (pain) in your body. The no-cook from Mississippi (me) is learning some good, healthy, low-inflammatory foods and doing well.
21) Pray and meditate—be still and recognize that the Divine Power (the God of your understanding) is within you and remain strong because you know your history and you come through a lot of p**p in your life!
22) If you know someone who has lost a loved one, please avoid clichés. Yes, God knows what is best. However, when someone loses a loved one, they often need you to be present through phone calls, video chats, or text messages. Let them know that you love them and you are there if they need you. Send them positive thoughts and virtual hugs!
In closing, stay S-A-F-E: Sane-Alive-Futuristic-Empowered! Remain empowered knowing that you will be sane, alive, and can endure these unsettling times!
Just saying,
Dr. Nurse Carole
