El Nido Birth & Family Ministries

11/07/2025

It feels heavy in my chest—
doing the little things,
the ordinary things.
Packing snacks, tying shoes,
listening to my kids laugh in the backseat
as the sun pours through the windows.

And yet somewhere just hours away,
the world has stopped.

Somewhere, a mother is frozen in time,
her heart pounding in her ears,
begging for news that won’t break her.
A mother who doesn't know
if her daughter will walk through the door again.

And maybe it hits even harder
because I have daughters too—
around the same age as the girls at camp.
They would’ve been laughing the same way,
packing the same swimsuits,
braiding each other’s hair,
singing songs under the stars.

The what-ifs crawl into my throat.
Because it could’ve been us.
It could’ve been them.

I think about that as I brush my daughter’s hair,
as I tuck her in under the covers,
as I tell her “I love you” for the fifth time in one night.
It feels unfair—how one home can be filled with light,
while another sits in the shadow of fear.

This flood didn’t just bring water.
It brought heartbreak.
It swept away more than land—
it took peace,
it took safety,
it left mothers clutching to hope
and aching for answers.

And I don’t know what to do
with the weight of that grief
when my hands are still full
of living children and loud mornings.

So I hold them tighter.
I watch them longer.
I let the little things go.
Because somewhere nearby,
a mother is praying to just have one more ordinary moment.

I whisper the names of those girls like a prayer,
I look toward the skies and ask God
to wrap His arms around the ones still waiting,
still pleading,
still believing.

Because while I sit here in the warmth of what I have,
there are mothers
just a drive away
sitting in the cold ache of what they might lose.

And I feel it all—
the gratitude,
the guilt,
the grief
on behalf of mothers
who didn’t get to tuck their daughters in tonight.

27/06/2025

Perfect explanation of “What is your transfer rate?”

Let's talk about the age old question you are asked at a consultation...

"What is your transfer rate?"

That can be a loaded question and really ask yourself what it means before asking the question. Do you mean emergency transfers where you had to call an ambulance? Do you mean a transfer where you as a provider had to make a call because of factors that led to mom/baby being safer in a hospital setting? Do you mean to include all of those couples who choose, on their own, to go in and get rest, epidural, or other interventions for whatever reasons?

You have to take into consideration that there is a team dynamic making decisions in the moment with a variety of details that play into the decision making for non-emergency transfers. It is usually a discussion and more than one thing that would spur the discussion to begin with - like not just exhaustion, but maybe they can't keep food down either (sometimes IV fluids are necessary and sometimes they aren't going to make a huge difference in the situation), or maybe on top of exhaustion, the mom starts to get low grade fever, or what if the baby's heart tones are now not reassuring after changing positions and doing all the things to get them to come back down...

Transfer from home or birth center is never just black and white - and my prayer would be that when a potential client asks this question, they ask in more detail to understand that not all of the time (and certainly most of the time) it isn't the midwife just stating a decision, but it is due to the fact that the midwife is honoring the mother's decision and autonomy with informed decision making.

How many first time moms does the midwife take - then see if a transfer rate is impacted by that alone because those births take a lot of patience, watching, and education beforehand (prenatally) for clients to understand that "maternal exhaustion" is the #1 reason they would transfer from home to hospital. But, midwives and practices teach, educate, talk about, and prepare the best way possible before birth to not be in that statistic.

Sometimes transfers are warranted.
Most of the time transfers would be non-emergent.
Most of the time transfers are a team discussion and decision.
Usually transfers are handled professionally and smoothly.
Oftentimes, midwives who have had a client, transfer for whatever reason, continue to do postpartum care for mom and well visits for baby.

Transfer is not a bad word. It shouldn't be used to detour a person from consulting with a practice. There are appropriate transfers from community birth to hospital birth. Ask questions, have discussions, and make an informed decision.

Is there a transfer of care antepartum (during prenatal period)
Is there a transfer of care intrapartum (during labor & birth)
Is there a transfer of care postpartum (after baby and placenta born)

"While 'home birth complications' can sound intimidating, it’s important to remember that midwives are skilled at recognizing and managing challenges long before they become emergencies. Most issues can be addressed at home, but if a higher level of care is needed, we have the training and resources to make transfers smooth and safe." and... "When a transfer happens, remember, it’s not a failure. It’s a brave, wise choice to use available tools for the best interests of mom and baby. And we’re there every step of the way, ensuring families feel supported, heard, and cared for." - Carolyn Denning, CNM, MSN

HomeBirthSummit.com states:

Transfer Guidelines Focused on Mother and Infant Safety

"When healthy mothers plan a home birth, they are most often cared for and monitored by skilled midwives. Infrequently, the mother or infant requires transfer from the home or birth center to the hospital to access specialized procedures or care. Good communication and coordination between providers during these transfers minimizes the potential for negative impact on outcomes. As the safety of the mother and infant is always of the highest priority, it is important to have detailed guidelines used by all health care providers involved in such transfers."

So, what is written here is a lot - and hopefully helps some couples understand the nuances of what goes into a decision making event that would cause a transfer to happen in a birthing situation.

What have you learned about transferring from community to hospital? I would love to see your input and wisdom, so we can all learn together!

12/05/2025

On Mother's Day we send love to every mother who holds her child not in her arms but in her heart and in her mind and in her dreams and her soul.

06/05/2025

Thank you to all the midwives and families that got me to licensure and the families that have invited me into their birth.

14/04/2025

This 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽

One of the biggest scams of modern parenting?
Thinking our babies need picture perfect nurseries, designer clothes, and a closet full of overpriced toys.
They don’t.
They need you.
They want your chest to sleep on, your voice singing off key lullabies, your eyes meeting theirs in the middle of the night.
They don’t care if their onesie was $4 from Walmart.
They don’t care if their crib is from a garage sale.
They don’t need Pinterest-worthy playrooms.
They need a safe place to fall asleep and a parent who loves them fiercely.

So if you’re a new parent drowning in “must-have” lists and Instagram pressure then listen to me:
You are the only thing they truly need.
Not the stuff.
Not the aesthetics.
You.

And you are already enough.

More than enough.

You always have been

10/04/2025

Findings contradict some doctors' beliefs that home births are more dangerous than delivering in a birth center.Read more: https://www.kgw.com/article/news/h...

03/03/2025

It's a gorgeous day for a birth story, women of strength! Meet Kristin, about her birth she writes:

"I had my C-section in 2022 due to failure to progress. My OB told me “history tends to repeat itself,” so I switched to a midwife so fast when I found out I was pregnant again. Spoiler alert: that’s not true! Fast forward 2 1/2 years, I had prodromal labor for about a week, so I got a membrane sweep when I was 41+4 at 1PM. By 4PM, I was having contractions every 4 minutes but was convinced it was prodromal so we went to Best Buy, HEB, and dinner with friends. In hindsight, I was swaying in the aisles because I couldn’t walk and sitting on my hands at dinner, so maybe I should’ve known. I got in the shower when we got home, thinking they would go away, but they picked up to 2 minutes. After trying different positions to slow them down, I finally admitted it was time and we met our doula at the hospital at 1AM. Around 4, I started to feel pushy but was only at a 7 (100% effaced). I started to get super anxious about my cervix swelling with the involuntary pushing, so I made the call at 5:30 for an epidural to help calm down, but by the time the anesthesiologist got there at 6:15, my "noises changed” and my midwife came in and could see a little bit of baby's head. She told me to keep pushing without ever checking me and the anesthesiologist that he could go! Our sweet baby boy joined us at 7:16! My water never fully broke so he was also born partially en caul. It was such a surreal moment. My husband just kept looking at me saying, “You did it.” I’ll never forget that feeling."

03/03/2025

Anxiety isn’t just a mental struggle—it’s deeply connected to our physical health, lifestyle, and daily habits. A one-sided approach to managing it can leave us missing out on some of the most powerful tools we have—including food.⁠
⁠
More and more research is revealing the connection between what we eat and how we feel, with exciting discoveries about how diet can help reduce anxiety symptoms. Here are a few nutrient-rich, anxiety-busting foods to add to your plate:⁠
⁠
🥑 Healthy Fats – Found in fish, nuts, avocados, and seeds, omega-3s support brain health and have been shown to help lower anxiety.⁠
⁠
🍫 Dark Chocolate – Rich in magnesium, which helps relax muscles, improve sleep, and ease anxiety, plus phytochemicals that boost mood. A delicious way to support your nervous system!⁠
⁠
🌾 Healthy Carbs – Whole grains, quinoa, and starchy vegetables aid serotonin production (your “happy” neurotransmitter). Avoiding carbs can spike cortisol (your stress hormone), so be mindful of balance!⁠
⁠
🫘 Beans – Packed with tryptophan, an amino acid that helps produce serotonin, plus B vitamins essential for stabilizing mood.⁠
⁠
🍵 Green Tea – High in L-theanine, an amino acid that promotes calmness and can even help with panic attacks. A great morning ritual!⁠
⁠
🥦 Asparagus – This one may surprise you! Rich in potassium and other minerals, asparagus helps regulate stress hormones and is even used in Chinese medicine for anxiety relief.⁠
⁠
🍊 Citrus Fruits – Oranges, lemons, and grapefruits are loaded with vitamin C, which helps lower cortisol levels, reduce oxidative stress, and support a balanced nervous system.⁠
⁠
These foods aren’t just great for managing anxiety—they contribute to long-term health and resilience. When combined with tools like therapy, mindfulness, movement, and supportive relationships, they can help create a well-rounded approach to feeling your best.⁠
⁠
Which of these foods do you already include in your diet? Do you have a favorite go-to meal that helps you feel calm and balanced? Let’s share in the comments!⁠
⁠
Save this post for future reference and tag a friend who could use these tips!

03/03/2025

Hello Chula Vista, my name is Debbie Zuniga Eakes. I am back home after being gone for 17 years.
I am a licensed, certified home birth midwife that has been serving families since 2006. I have been licensed since 2021. I am also a Certified Lactation Counselor and postpartum doula.

As we meet during your pregnancy, we make a birth plan that fits you, have private appointments, and I aim to answer any of your questions. I do lots of education to help you make decisions that is right for your family.

I am looking to serve San Diego’s South Bay. Are you low risk and interested in what a home birth could look like for you? PM me and lets set up a free 1 hour meet and greet.

23/11/2024

So many have asked if we are selling the ENBFM/TNT building and the short answer is yes. We just finished packing the last of my MN office to complete a year long process of our move home to CA. We are not here yet but will be soon with my dad. Cried through the whole thing. We will be kissing 2 grand babies goodbye for at least 6 months. But, we are enjoying spending time with my parents for as long as God grants and enjoying 3 more grandkids and 1 great grand. Seasons of life change, but God does not. He will reveal the next steps for the ministry in His timing. Thankful for all the wonderful families that allowed me to share their birth so that I could become a licensed midwife and those that allowed us to serve them after.

31/03/2024

What does it mean to walk as a Midwife?
Well first my love, you better grow thick skin. The purposeful propaganda that started centuries ago is still strong today. Walk in a room and say you are a home birth midwife and watch what happens. Projections, reflections, traumas, and ignorance. You will become a mirror. Remember to reflect back love and grace for you represent the thin veil between life and death. You will grow to know it well.
Being a midwife means gentle hands and whispered tones even when your heart is beating loudly in your ears and you haven't turned off your vigilance for hours/days. It's a full bladder, dehydrated mouth, and growling stomach that gets pushed aside because your presence means something.
Midwifery is stopping a hemorrhage that people don't even know is happening because youre smiling and cooing at the baby to keep up the oxytocin.It is sitting on a living room floor helping a baby cry while telling everyone, "Oh my goodness look how cute she is! Her color is getting so pink! Her heart is so strong." It is sometimes being the voice in the room that says, "I think you would benefit from an epidural." Then at the next birth you are nodding along as a woman cries she can't do it as you guide her to the tub because you know her baby is arriving soon. It is jumping for joy at that first latch and each ounce of baby weight gained.
It is knowing that these truths will be seen as sacrilegious to some and not "true" Midwifery. Then on the other side, you will have people shocked that you know how to take a blood pressure and amazed that you understand how to manage emergencies. You will not win over them all. You have to accept this.
It is knowing you are not God and you humbly submit to the understanding that you will never predict or control it all.
It is missing date nights and apologizing that you have to keep getting up to answer the phone. Saying no to activities you so desperately want to do but there is no cell service and a baby is arriving soon.
But mostly, its hearing the voice in your head saying after each moment with a mother, "If that is all I ever did, it is more than enough. This is what it means to work for the Divine"