Kids Master Skills by Lisa Marnell - Neuroaffirming Autism Support

04/21/2026

From Deficit-Thinking to Lack of Fit:

Too often, school based OT evaluations focus on what an Autistic student cannot do instead of examining where the fit is breaking down between the student, the environment, and the demands of the school day.

At AOTA Inspire 2026, I will be speaking about a different way forward namely, shifting from a deficit lens toward Lack of Fit.

This shift changes what we assess, how we approach assessments, how we interpret participation, and how we write supports, recommendations, and goals.

If you work in schools, what part of writing neuroaffirming evaluations feels hardest right now?

04/13/2026

Do you want to adopt neuroaffirming OT practice in your school?

Did you know that you can ask your district to sign up and pay for this PD for you and for your entire OT department?

Ask your district to set up a meeting with me to learn more!

03/28/2026

As an Autistic adult, with my own OT clinic and a lot on my plate with speaking and school district presentations, I face the same challenge - every day. And it is this:

I struggle with transitions.

This makes life difficult!

The stress I feel typically (always) disappears once I am inside the new task, when this task is something I enjoy and that I am drawn toward. Once I start the task, I remember how I LOVE to engage deeply and I do engage - once I have transitioned. Then, I am fine.

I suspect people may experience upcoming events in many ways, and here are two ways:

Type A:

* feels good anticipating something
* structure reduces stress

Type B (me)

* resists pre-commitment
* feels better once inside the activity
* experiences structure as constraint until it begins

What helps me . . . and may help the Autistic students YOU support:

Ensure that we are transitioning to something students enjoy and want to participate in, but if it is something "difficult" support students in these ways:

a) these "chores" can be framed in ways that explain WHY they must be done; "Going to the dentist is unpleasant, but they help make sure our teeth and gums feel good."

b) transitions are paired with support that does FEEL GOOD (AKA: dopamine pairing); "Here, maybe take this book with you to the dentist appointment. It might give you a nice distraction."

c) transitions are approached with adult/peer co-regulation, validation, and understanding - "I will walk to the office with you to meet your mom for you to go to the dentist appointment."

d) transitions are known ahead of time and the "spoons required" (using spoon theory) are acknowledged and a plan is put in place for HOW to help with this transition.

In my case . . .

So, as an Autistic adult, and OT, I experience PDA (pervasive drive for autonomy), as many of our kids do, and I TRULY struggle with my own day to day tasks: . . . I have to go into the clinic this afternoon, . . . I have to finish that OT report, . . . I have to do that Zoom with that teacher pr parent.

Feeling resistance and great dysregulation does not mean that I want to change my life and stop being an affirming OT or close the doors to my business. But what it does mean is that I have to rely on STRATEGIES to not let these transition demands get the better of me (Let's call this "Anticipatory Transitioning") and stress me out hours and hours before something on my schedule happens.

So, what do I do?

I choose Door d) above mainly. In other words . . . when I know a transition is coming and it weighs on me (even a transition to a task I like - like seeing OT kids in my clinic) I have a plan for transition that I do ahead of time.

So what does my transition plan look like?

1- I make OT session plans on Sunday evenings (I know we are "not supposed" to work when we are not working, but taking one hour every Sunday evening helps me manage transitions and what I do throughout the week).

When I know what types of activities to "strew" in my clinic, when I know what I will be suggesting in OT sessions, my anxiety for the transition to all the kids feel easier.

2- I make a list of materials I need for each OT client, and this takes way more stress off my plate.

I also use Door a) above as well, namely, I remind myself that when I work with kids or when I jump onto that school district Zoom, I will love what I do. This self-talk carries me through a lot!

I use Door b) as well and pair so many feel-good things with transitions - and my biggest dopamine pairing is listening to music. I have favorite songs - we all do and our kids do as well - so it works to pair a favorite somg with a tough transition.

So, I listen to my favorite songs as I get ready to leave my house nad head to my clinic.

And a question for you . . . when was the last time you supported a student by asking for and playing their favorite song during a transition?

And full disclosure, I am great at supporting myself through music and not consistent with offering this to the children I support.

And what about Door c)? How do I use co-regulation to help me through transitions. I don't - or do I?

What I mean is that I don't have a person beside me holding my hand and walking me into a transition. But I would like that. At times, for sure, my partner would be there for me but they are at work much of the time.

But I do have my dogs! Luna (whacky, energetic husky terrier) and Lord Grantham (LG - a cranky but lovable Bichon mix) and they absolutely do co-regulate me when I remember to take the time to spend minutes petting them as a transition gets closer. I must remind myself to use their calm to support my nervous system!

So, please share in the comments!

What do you do NOW to support your students?

What can you ADD to your approaches to support them even better?!
. . and thanks for reading and listening!

Lisa

03/17/2026

Let me know in the comments what you do with one Autistic child to celebrate their joy?!

03/17/2026

As adults who work to support autistic students, we know the importance of access to movement for regulation. But, and where we are missing the boat, is that we don’t often introduce, explore, and practice different movement when a child is very regulated.

When we practice movements when kids feel relaxed and safe, they can focus on how that movement feels in their bodies and what impact it has on their energy, regulation, and thinking.

I like to put different types of movement for kids to try, such as reach for your toes or running in place, which provide very different types of body input.

Understanding themselves and how their bodies and brains work are so important for achieving regulation.

Type “MOVE” in the comments below, and I will send you my free resource with movement cards for sensory regulation.

sbot

03/16/2026

As an occupational therapist, I have worked with many neurodivergent students who were given handwriting worksheets before foundational, underlying skills were in place.

And this never ends well!

This is because handwriting is one of the most difficult tasks we can expect from children - especially when differences in motor skill and motor planning are seen in our neurodivergent students.

Handwriting requires not only motor abilities. It also involves visual recognition of letter forms, visual scanning, motor planning, and memory for how letters are constructed - aka: a kinesthetic "feel" for letter formation.

Also, handwriting MUST be meaningful to a child!

Because of all this, I began developing a scaffolded approach that moves through four stages:

Look:
Students first study the letter and its visual features, strengthening recognition and visual perception. (Type "LOOK" in the comments to get your sample!)

Listen:
Each letter is paired with a brief story or cue that helps students remember the sequence and structure of the strokes.

Make:
Students build letters using materials such as Play-Doh, stickers, or other tactile media to support motor planning and spatial understanding.

Master:
Only then do we move into written practice, with worksheets with letters with visual cues for formation and that gradually decrease in size to support controlled letter size.

This approach has gradually evolved into the handwriting curriculum, called "Handwriting Help for Kids".

It is designed for K through first grade and includes materials across all four stages.

LOOK.

LISTEN.

MAKE.

MASTER.

For those who would like to explore it, I have made a sample of the first pillar available. LOOK. And you will see as you exploe your pages, that tasks are not rote but rather hands-on and CHALLENGING as kids seek to find the correct letters and use clothes pin and putty on the pages!

Type "LOOK" in the comments to get your sample!

03/02/2026

So important for everyone to listen to and learn from Autistic people.r

Ways people have made me feel like an unacceptable type of human would probably surprise you. My elementary school teachers told us every morning what a good human being looked like. When it came time for reciting the pledge, all teachers said you had to have a quiet body or else you were being disrespectful. I can remember the horrible shame I experienced. I remember thinking friends would think I was not a good person. It's one of many tacit messages I received daily, while other students absorbed it all as well.



[Image: Curly haired Bri from the waist up, looking down, with arms raised to the side and hands in motion. Wearing brown headphones, a black Vans hoodie, and maroon braided t-shirt necklace. Background is a rustic coffee shop.]

02/26/2026

Love this!

What do you think?

02/25/2026

Type "BRUSH" to get your social story to support Autistic kids as they learn the ins and outs and how they can have autonomy with brushing teeth.

When you are a neuroaffirming adult in a child's life, social stories are not about getting a child to "comply" with brushing teeth or teaching them the “right” way to do it.

When written according to Carol Gray’s guidelines, Social Stories are descriptive and objective. They explain what something is, why people might do it, and what it could feel like. The intent is understanding, not compliance (Gray, 2010).

When uncertainty decreases, regulation often improves. Research supports the careful use of Social Stories when they are written and implemented with fidelity.

Although many of us here work in schools, function and health matter. Oral care affects comfort, sensory experience, and readiness to learn. This story can be used in class for all kids, in sessions, previewed with students, or shared with families so the same language carries across environments.

Social stories (when written objectively about the world) simply offer clear information about an everyday routine.

And for many students, that clarity makes a meaningful difference!

Do you support Autistic kids to learn to brush their teeth?

If so, what helps you support them?