08/22/2025
An interesting read about those school calls for pick up due to behavior!
This is from another mom friend who is a former teacher and i think it is valuable information for other special needs mamas:
My son is having a rough first week. We had two really good days, and then the last 3 have been disasters with multiple meltdowns. Today he was having one because he didn't want to stop reading his favorite book when it was time to transition from reading to writing time in class. The teacher took the book out of his hands and put it away and he lost it - full screaming meltdown. So, of course, she called me. And that's ok. I'd rather KNOW what's going on than not know (and we've had some of that too). When I asked how I could help with the situation RIGHT NOW (with my son wailing in the background), she responded with "I think you need to come get him - I don't know if he can come back from this." (Meaning "I don't know if he'll be ok to participate in the rest of the day" not "I don't think he needs to be at school.") I said "Ok - that's fine, but I'll need the signed incident report before I can sign him out at the office." She was flabergasted. "What do you mean "incident report" - what kind of incident report do you need me to fill out?"
For anyone not aware (and this is why I'm posting!), if the school calls and says you need to come get your child because of a behavior problem, IT COUNTS AS A SUSPENSION LEGALLY AND NEEDS TO BE DOCUMENTED THAT WAY. If there's no paperwork, it didn't happen. And schools' accreditations depend, in part, on their rates of suspension and attendance for minority groups, including SPECIAL EDUCATION STUDENTS! DO NOT let them say it's not a suspension or they'll "fill you in later." Get it in writing before you sign your child out. They're missing instructional time - it's a denial of their FAPE (Free appropriate public education) rights and it's a really, really good indication that the IEP (individualized education plan) and BIP (behavior improvement plan) are either not being followed or need updating to better support your kid.
After 10 days of cumulative suspensions, you are legally entitled to a manifestation hearing. (Basically a hearing to determine if the behaviors are a manifestation of the child's disability or something else.) Spoiler alert: THEY ARE ALMOST ALWAYS A MANIFESTION OF THEIR DISABILITY when you're dealing with PWS and Autism. But if those suspensions aren't documented as suspensions, they didn't happen - you signed your child out for an unexcused absence.
I know all this from working a decade as a teacher (mostly inclusion high school and middle school science) and because I NEVER felt well prepared by teacher ed programs for special education issues and decided to remedy that myself. But I also know it from reading the "Parental Rights" or "Procedural Safeguards" booklet that they are legally required to offer you at each IEP meeting.
