Let it Go (2025)

24/07/2024

This made me laugh 😆
… eat the cake 🍰 😋

24/07/2024

Just be you and embrace your uniqueness
💃🕺🏻🥳🙃

11/07/2024

Some facts about domestic abuse …

The police receive a domestic abuse related call every 30 seconds.

Yet it is estimated that less than 24% of domestic abuse crime is reported to the police.

1 in 4 women in England and Wales will experience domestic abuse in her lifetime.

On average, one woman is killed by an abusive partner or ex every five days in England and Wales.

Men are also victims of domestic abuse , but they are even less likely to ask for help.

Today Alannah’s Celebration of Life was held.
It was heart wrenching to see her life played out on a screen.
To hear her best friend make the most emotional and brave tribute, was more than I have words for.

Please help raise awareness, please help people understand what they are living, isn’t normal.

Be their voice, if they have lost theirs.

Abuse starts off slowly, so you don’t notice.
They confuse you by being nice and then being cruel.
By saying something, then denying they said it.
By blaming everything on you and taking no accountability.

The confused state is where they want you,
If you’re confused, you can’t think properly … and that’s the trap.

Don’t be a statistic.
Let Alannahs voice be silenced no more and all those who went before her ❤️

I have never asked for my post to be shared, but if you feel this could help someone - please share it 🙏

Emeline Hartley

09/07/2024

Its ok to not be liked by some people, infact its inspiring 🙌

It’s an immediate sign that you’re off course 🙃

You cannot grow or learn self-love, if you are around the people who don’t see you 👀

It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you, it just means you aren’t valuing yourself ❤️

Take the no’s as a signpost, that you aren’t where you fit 🧩

I can help you find yourself, so you no longer try to fit in to what you’ve outgrown, or where you aren’t being valued ❤️

08/07/2024

Self worth makes our decisions for us and also determines which decisions, we allow others to make for us 🤔

When it isn’t balanced - through childhood experiences, relationship issues and any other life experience we have - our decisions and choices are then decided around this 😐

We react from the imbalance maybe becoming defensive as not wanting to be taken advantage of again, or play out people pleasing behaviour, hoping if you give more, you will be loved and accepted ❤️

During sessions, we can look at why self worth isn’t balanced and how that plays out, in day to day life.
Are there repeating patterns?
Are you feeling alienated?
Are you exhausted from being misunderstood?
Are you being taken advantage of?
Is someones behaviour confusing you?
Do you feel unheard?

There are many reasons why these things may be happening, the important thing is your reaction to it 😏😔😖

Together we can discuss whats happening around you, talk through it to understand it and then break the patterns.

Its so powerful to understand ourselves, yet we spend more time trying to work other people out.
Once we understand ourselves, we also understand our reactions 👌

Healing the wound that causes us to respond the way we do, breaks the cycle and sets us free 🙌

28/06/2024

You can heal what you’re aware of
You can heal what you acknowledge
You can heal what you accept
You can heal what you feel
You can heal what you forgive

Then you can let it go, feeling the growth from the experience 🦋

27/06/2024

Made me laugh 😆

21/06/2024

Love bombing is used by people with certain disorders.
Some more extreme than others, but the patterns are the same.

It’s a distraction, a tactic used to avoid you seeing their true character.
It’s done to make you think, you are really important to them.
It’s not love, it’s manipulation.
It’s control, it’s coercive and it’s a big red flag 🚩

It begins at the start to hook you in, then usually wears off once they feel they’ve gained sufficient control.
It can return right after they’ve done something, which would hurt or upset you.
A distraction from their behaviour.

It’s premeditated and is done to confuse you, making you feel guilty for questioning their actions.
It’s not genuine, it’s a trick 🤡

It’s called love bombing because it blows apart any doubts you may have 💣

After the love bombing stage, comes the silent treatment stage 🤐 and then fault finding.
They no longer need to win you over, that job is done.
So they start criticising, blaming, demanding and then begin the isolation stage.

It’s a cycle they go around in, if one manipulative pattern doesn’t work, they go back to another one …. and so on and so on ⭕️

It can be difficult to see because their behaviour, as it adapts very quickly to each current situation.
They are masters of disguise.

Trust your gut, don’t be convinced something is right, if it feels off.

20/06/2024

This is what holding on looks like, what it keeps us from and how heavy it weighs us down ⚓️

We fight to hold on and fight to let go, knowing how to release, sets us free 🎈

19/06/2024

Would you leave your front door open 24/7 and invite anyone in 🤔

I recently had a client whose daughter had suddenly started to see and hear spirits 🤍
She was so excited she kept asking for more …
What neither of them realised was, they were atttracting anything and everything.

Intention alone can attract all sorts of things.
Whilst I don’t believe there is “dark” energy, I have become aware, there are energies which lack light.

Throughout my life I’ve had many experiences and not all of them have been good 🙄
I couldn’t switch it off, so instead I set out to understand it.
I’m still on that journey, as it goes deeper and deeper 🌀

I’ve spoke to several people recently who don’t want to “lose the gift” and so, carry on having some quite scary experiences without having any idea what they mean.
They are left with questions and confusion.

When we understand more, we can filter what’s received, so we only attract what’s for the highest good.
What we then receive, is clear and understood.

It’s such a simple process and can really speed up your spiritual growth 🤍

There are so many things we wouldn’t do because we have no experience…
We wouldn’t get in and fly a plane, without being taught how to do it.
Or go out and sail a yacht in the middle of the ocean, without someone to guide us or teach us.
It’s the same thing.

It’s an amazing feeling to connect with spirit, and pass on messages from their loved ones 🤍
But it’s also a big responsibility and can be a huge learning curve.

I help show people how to connect safely, so you know who’s crossing your threshold …

12/06/2024

People in coercive and controlling relationships, rarely know they are in one, or the danger they are in.

Coercive behaviour is against the law, it’s recognised as a criminal offence.
It’s real, lives are taken far too soon every day because of it.

Are you covering up what’s really happening, because you think you are the problem?
Convincing yourself it’ll be ok and it’ll get better if you try harder?
Or feel that you’ll get in trouble, so keep quiet to avoid a reaction?

It doesn’t matter what you do, what you say or who you become.
If your partner doesn’t or can’t look at their own behaviour, then nothing can change.
You are not the problem.

Nothing you do, will ever be enough.

You may not know how to get out?
You may think, they’re about to change so why give up now?
They usually make you dependent upon them, so you can’t see a way out.

When you want to leave, they may promise to change, become loving and remind you of why you’re with them.
But that won’t last for long.
It’s called love bombing, it’s done to keep you under their control and confuse you.

They isolate you from people who love you, so they have ultimate control.
Did they love you for who you were when they met you, but then expect you to change completely?

Are they controlling what you wear, who you see, what you think and how to feel?

You were chosen because you have a big heart, you’re understanding, kind, considerate and compassionate.

You cannot see the ‘bad’ in people and believe if you change, then the person you’re with, will be happy and then you will be happy too.
But then there will always be something else that annoys them … and then something else and that’s the start of the cycle.
Nothing is ever enough.

They don’t love you, this is not love, this is control.
They want to take everything they see in you, away from you.
Because they don’t have it.

Don’t be a statistic, don’t push your friends and family away who love you.
Let Alannah show you what can happen, if you trust the wrong person.

Their control only works, if you don’t share what’s happening.
That’s how they trap you.

You may not know who to trust anymore?
Because you may have been told over and over again, nobody loves you, you are useless, crazy, worthless, lazy, fat, thin, stupid, clumsy, ugly, that nobody else would want you, that nobody would ever treat you better, that you’ll have no home, no money.

If there is someone telling you what you’re living with isn’t right, isn’t normal and offer to help you - please trust them.
It may not make sense at the time, but it will later.
Once you are no longer under their control, you will begin to see clearly again.

Let Alannah’s voice be heard, don’t let her beautiful light be put out completely, without reason.
Let her shine on by guiding and steering you to safety.

Don’t leave your friends and family heartbroken, desperately wishing they had done more.
Don’t suffer in silence, you are not alone 🤍

Emeline Hartley ❤️

07/06/2024

Just over 3 months ago, one of my dearest friends life changed forever.
Her daughter’s life ended, in the hands of a very damaged man.
She fought to save her and bring her home from hospital, but was left unsupported by police and hospital staff.

They have apologised, but it doesn’t bring her beautiful daughter home.
It doesn’t giver her brothers any peace.
It doesn’t relieve the agony and it doesn’t provide any answers.
It doesn’t change a thing.

There are no laws around who can claim to be next of kin - all it really is, is an emergency contact number.

A beautiful light has been put out far too soon, because the red flags were ignored by everyone, except her mum.
But no one listened to her.

There are extremes of controlling behaviour and Alannah, is tragically a victim of one of those extremes.

You cannot love everyone better.
Damaged people, damage people, hurt people hurt people and all she tried to do was love him more, to heal him.
When all he intended to do was take her light, because he couldn’t find his own.

The agony and torture my friend is going through is horrific.
Please be aware of the signs of a manipulative relationship.
Don’t ignore the red flags.
Intervene, make yourself unpopular and get them apart, any way you can.
They can seem charming, kind, victimized, needy … anything to draw you in.
Watch their behaviour, don’t listen to their words.
That’s how you’ll see through them.

You cannot love red flags out of people.

Sleep peacefully Alannah 🤍🕊️
Your light shines on 💗

Emeline Hartley

In memory of our wonderful Alannah we have decided to set up a charity with the aim offering assistance to families and friends suspicious that a loved one may be a potential victim of a coercive and controlling relationship.

Based on current statistics, there have been over 100 Alannah's since her tragic death on her 24th birthday... 17th March 2024 - over 100 preventable deaths of mainly young women in coercive and controlling relationships just like Alannah.

We can never bring Alannah back, but if we are able to help prevent even one tragic loss of life, it will be a huge achievement.

Let it Go

24/07/2024

24/07/2024

11/07/2024

09/07/2024

08/07/2024

28/06/2024

27/06/2024

21/06/2024

20/06/2024

19/06/2024

12/06/2024

07/06/2024

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