
30/07/2025
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a type of therapy that can be used to treat OCD and other mental health issues. In this four part series, I will describe some of the things I have learned while applying IFS to my daily life. As someone with OCD, I have found that it is a great way to complement exposure and response prevention (ERP) and develop more self-compassion. Internal Family Systems therapy is based on the idea that we do not have one unique mind, but rather that our minds are comprised of parts that have separate (and often extreme) beliefs. These parts have their own personalities and characteristics, and just like a dysfunctional family, they tend to argue amongst themselves, as well as defend or criticize each other. In sum: It’s a little chaotic. But once you get to know these parts and understand their motives, you can begin to empathize with them. This leads you to have more self-compassion, which is the root of any good therapy.
To begin, let’s talk about two common parts: The Anxious part and the Critic. The Anxious part catastrophizes and tells you something very bad will happen if you don’t do something (quick)! It also is very afraid of the Critic, who will chastise you if you do not perform perfectly. When something goes wrong, the critic jumps in, yelling in your ear just how badly you did and how you could’ve done better. The Anxious part tries to protect you from that part, but as a result, often leads you to perform compulsions. These parts are driven by separate though not distinct core beliefs. The Anxious part believes that the world is a dangerous, awful place, full of landmines. Her goal is to protect you from those landmines, to keep you safe. The Critic believes that you must be perfect at all cost, or bad things will happen. She is also trying to protect you.
You may notice that both those parts, while different, are trying to protect you. This is the common denominator with most, if not all, of your parts. Once you realize this, you can speak to your parts and call a truce. This relieves a lot of inner tension and allows you to relax, but it takes practice. These parts right now are probably strangers to you, but by listening to them and comforting them, you will begin to have empathy where previously you may have been very angry with them.
You can learn more in Richard Schwartz’s book “No Bad Parts.”