24/10/2020
We needed this reminder this week
I don't know about you, but this has been a tough parenting season for us. The fear is real, the hard conversations are in full swing, and it seems like the smallest things require significant cost/benefit analyses.
I thought it might be a good time to dig back into The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting research. It's been helping us (huge thanks to all of the research participants).
This first learning is a reminder of the core finding from this research: Some of the best strategies rely on modeling the behaviors we want to see. Turns out that we need to be the adult that we want our kids to grow up to be. Dammit.
There is immeasurable power in our children watching us practice self-kindness vs. berating ourselves or putting ourselves down when we stumble, fail, or make mistakes. And, no matter how we encourage them to talk to themselves, they are definitely watching to see what really matters.
And, letting them in on our process is equally as powerful: "I really dropped the ball today and I'm struggling to be kind to myself about it and talk to myself the way I'd talk to someone I love." Modeling, normalizing that it isn't easy, and connecting.
Y'all have a great weekend! Awkward, brave and kind, folks.
