06/12/2023
Have you ever felt drained by the demands of others?
Me too.
After all, Davido was right.
“ I love you no mean say if you say make I put one hand for fire, I go put hand for fire”.
In a world where connections with others are vital, understanding the significance of setting boundaries is key.
Boundaries are like dieting.
Eating is good for the body. Right?
But to stay healthy and in shape, you have to be picky about what you allow into your mouth.
And by the way, that’s why I don’t and will never give “head”.
Throat cancer is not my portion in Jesus name.
The leading risk factor for all throat cancer is human papillomavirus (HPV).
HPV is a s3xually transmitted infection that can be transferred through oral s3x.
In addition, in my official opinion. I think men giving women “head”, is why women no longer respect men,
Since you give them “head”, they now feel like they are the head of the family.
But I digress.
Here’s why you must have BOUNDARIES.
Setting boundaries is not merely about drawing lines and being uptight for no just reason ( like most self-inflicted LONELY and DEPRESSED singles do).
Rather, it should be about SELF-CONTROL and reclaiming your power.
It's like saying, “Hey, I like you a lot, you’re my buddy, but you don’t OWN ME”.
Or saying, “I am not your robot; I have my own mind”.
Setting boundaries will boost your self-esteem.
For instance, when you say no to a request that you find unreasonable, you are sending a message that you respect your time and energy, and that you expect others to do the same.
When you confidently decline a request, you're not just saying "no" to hurt others.
You're asserting that your time and energy are precious.
Imagine the ripple effect of that.
Nevertheless, setting boundaries is easier said than done.
Many people fear that saying no to others will make them lose their love, approval, or friendship.
Others feel guilty or selfish for putting their own needs first, or worry about hurting or offending others.
Others dread the confrontation or backlash that may result from asserting their boundaries.
Overcoming these obstacles requires a deeper understanding of the reason why you want to set boundaries to begin with.
Striking a balance between “assertiveness” and “empathy” is essential to navigate these challenges successfully.
I wish I could explain the above sentence further, but it would take a mini-book to do so.
Also, in a climate where everybody pretends to know it all, I don’t think anybody would be interested in reading my take.
So let's keep it moving.
In closing, I want to say a thing or two about the RED FLAGS of setting boundaries.
What most people call boundaries are only a display of the following toxic behaviours;
✅Superiority complex,
✅Overinflated self-worth,
✅Unhealthy pride,
✅Refusal to apologize for wrong done,
✅Being wicked and unreasonable,
✅Being selfish and rigid.
With these sickening behaviours, you may end up building a wall that isolates you from the world.
You may miss out on valuable feedback, opportunities, and experiences that could enrich your life.
You may also alienate or push away those who care about you, and deprive yourself of intimacy and connection.
It is crucial to recognise that healthy boundaries should act as bridges, connecting us with others rather than fortresses, isolating us from the richness of human connection.
Boundaries are great. Set them. But be careful so you don't IMPRISON YOURSELF.
If the boundaries aren’t improving yourself and making you happier, then, dear friend, you have imprisoned yourself.
`Fotizo
~
