04/02/2025
One night, a certain 7yr old boy was sent to bed in accordance with his bedtime routine. But, he didn't like going to bed when he wasn't sleepy. Oftentimes he would get out of bed and state that he had forgotten to return a toy, or he wanted a cup of water, or he wanted to read a book ... anything that would allow him to get out of bed. On this particular night, 10mins being put to bed by his mother, he approached her and told her that his palms were itchy. Used to his shenanigans whenever the boy did not want to sleep, his mother told him to go and wash his hands with soap then return to bed, and promptly returned to her phone where she was playing Gardenscapes. The boy went straight to his father and informed him that his palms were itchy. His father who had been working on his laptop, turned to him, asked to see his palms and inspected them. Then he told him to go and wash is hands with soap and return to bed. The boy happily answered okay, went off to wash his hands and got into bed. He didn't return with another complaint.
There was nothing wrong with the boy's palms. both parents gave him the same advise but he only listened to one. All he wanted was to be heard and seen. When that was done, there was no reason to boomerang out of bed again.
We all act like the little boy, or the mother or the mother. The little boy did not recognise that the problem was not itchy palms, even though they did feel itchy. Both the mother and the father knew full well that the problem was not itchy palms. The mother believed he was just avoiding bedtime. Of course he was, but her dealing with the problem ended with action and did not address his feelings and thoughts of frustration and irritation. The father dealt with all three by validating the little boy's emotions, acknowledging that he was having a tough time with whatever he was going through, showing him that he mattered and not belittling his problem, giving him full focus and attention and giving him actions to do to solve his problem. That is why the little boy went back to bed happily.
Which of these are you?
