Tree of Life Services - End of Life & Funeral Services

18/04/2026

Gratitude.

When I was a child, I was taught to count my blessings, to be grateful for everything I had in my life.

There are studies which show that living life with gratitude makes us happier, it improves our satisfaction with our lives, so gratitude is good for us.

In today’s hugely disrupted world, where every day we hear reports of mass killings, wars, injustice, rapidly rising prices, and people showing hatred towards others, it’s often hard to feel grateful.

But the happiness of our lives is impacted by our perspective on life and how we choose to feel at any given time.

Here in Australia, we are currently feeling the fall-out of world events and it’s when these events start to affect us personally, gratitude is even harder to find.

Back to that perspective, in Australia, we are not at war, we don’t have bombs raining down and the military of another country trying to kill us, we are still living in peace, and that’s certainly something to be very grateful for.

When I was conducting a burial service a week ago, it was a beautiful, mild sunny day. I had written a ceremony which told the story of the person who’s service we were conducting.

The ceremony was full of love, friends and family came up to speak, emotions were shared, beautiful music was played, tears were shed and the acknowledgement of grief was open to all.

We conducted this ceremony in peace and love.

Death is inevitable, but how we honour our dead makes all the difference to the depths of our grief. Holding a funeral service which has been individually created brings peace and the start of healing for the people left behind.

Afterwards, I reflected on how lucky we are that we have the privilege to honour our deceased loved ones in this way, as I thought about the over 160 small innocent children in Iran who went to school one day and then were bombed from the face the earth.

These children didn’t have any such opportunity to be laid to rest like we have in Australia. Their families didn’t have the opportunity to say goodbye in such a beautiful way as the service I held earlier in the day.

I thought about the over 65,000 people in Gaza who had also been wiped out and how so many of them will never even be properly laid to rest as their bodies will never be found, or their remains will go into a mass grave. The idea of this makes me so very sad for them all.

So for your own sake, and for the sake of those around you, see if you can develop a gratitude practice – instead of being critical or angry or complain about your life, focus on what you have to be grateful for, and celebrate it. Your perspective on life will change and your happiness will improve, which is another thing to be grateful for!

When people come to the end of their lives, what often matters most to them is the relationships they’ve had, the love they’ve shared, time shared with others, not their worldly goods, or how much time they devoted to work, they are grateful for the sharing of human experiences, and the love.

Our lives may not be perfect, but I for one am very grateful for the life we have here in our lucky country.

Lauren Newman, Tree of Life Services & Funerals

12/11/2025

I am thrilled to announce that I have been gifted a Cooling Plate!

This will be a valuable resource for the people of the Eurobodalla Shire.

A Cooling Plate is a portable refrigerated unit which is slipped under the body of a deceased person so they can stay in their own home after death.

In NSW, we can keep a deceased person at home for up to 5 days, and with the help of myself as a Funeral Director and End of Life Doula, we can also place them in their coffin at home and organise all the paperwork, and a funeral, without the need for the person's body to be taken to a mortuary.**

This is particularly suitable for a burial at Walawaani Way Conservation Burial in Bodalla.

Holding a Vigil with friends and family can be a beautiful way to start saying your farewells to someone you love who has died. It is a gentle and kind way to start your grieving process. An End of Life Doula can help you make this happen. Perhaps you'd like music, candles, prayers, whatever you'd like, together we can design this deeply personal and meaningful time to honour your person.

I am making this plate available to the wider community and other End of Life Doulas / Workers such as Shanna Provost in Tilba, Kerryn Davey, also in Tilba, and Deepika Mistry in Batemans Bay.

**Of course, not all funerals can be arranged within a 5 day period and some people may only want to keep their person at home for a day or two, but we will make every effort to accommodate whatever you need.

For more information, please see Tree of Life Funerals at https://lnkd.in/gpX6EV2K, www.treeoflifefunerals.com.au or email: treeoflifefunerals@outlook.com

22/09/2025

Rituals in deathcare.

As the amazing Dr Sarah Kerr of the Centre for sacred deathcare says, “when someone you love dies, it’s natural to focus on the funeral as the central moment. However, the time between a death and the funeral is just as important.

This part of the journey that often gets missed, but it’s the time that can deeply shape how you experience both the funeral and your grief.

It’s tender, it’s powerful, and it can make all the difference.
The time between death and the funeral can be a time of really integrating, coming to terms with the fact that they are gone.
We don’t want them to be gone, we wish they weren’t gone, but, they are.”

The work that we do ritually along that timeline is what allows at the funeral for us to fully say farewell, to send them along their journey, and to let them go.

With all our love and all our grief, we send them on their way.
Even if you don’t hold a formal funeral, and organise a no-service cremation or burial, you can still have your own rituals in between the time of death and the cremation.

You can then hold a Memorial Service at a time that better suits family and friends so you can all come together to say your farewells.

Ritual in our lives are very important. Rituals keep us grounded in the familiar and through that, provide comfort.

Whether it’s the simple ritual of lighting a candle, or praying, or the ritual of a church service, or of holding a funeral or memorial service, all such practices bring us together and provide comfort.

If you have spiritual beliefs, it’s comforting to know that the soul of your person has crossed over and that they know you are honouring them with your grief and the rituals you engage in.

It’s never “too late” to hold your rituals, your ceremonies, as they always make a positive difference.

We at Tree of Life Funerals are experienced in end of life work, ceremony and ritual, and will guide and support you through the hugely difficult time of having someone you love die.

We can help you decide the best way for you to say goodbye.
Contact us for all your end of life and funeral needs on
0493-276-554 or see:

Locally and privately owned and operated, the experienced team at Tree of Life Funerals are here for you at your time of need, providing personal, caring, and individual attention.We create authentic, personalised, heart-felt funeral services which really reflect the individual. To provide you with....

18/08/2025

Save the date!

For our September bi-monthly Bermagui Death Conversations Cafe, we are pleased to welcome a representative from the Southern NSW Local Health District Voluntary Assisted Dying (VAD) team.

Our guest will share the eligibility requirements for Voluntary Assisted Dying, related legislation information and will be available to answer any questions you have about Voluntary Assisted Dying in NSW.

This is a space for people from all walks of life to come together, share, listen, and connect in a non-judgmental and supportive environment.

What to Expect:

- an opportunity to learn about VAD, ask questions, and engage with experts and community members in a supportive environment

- Thought-provoking discussions on what VAD is, what it isn’t

- A welcoming, confidential environment where you can speak freely

We hope to create an atmosphere where you can ask the tough questions and listen to others’ stories.

Please note:

1. this is not a grief support group or a therapy session but a unique opportunity to talk openly and honestly about mortality and VAD

2. the fee goes towards venue hire and light refreshments

3. doors open from 1:45pm to allow time to grab a cuppa, a plate of food (light refreshments) and a seat before 2pm kick off.

Date: Sunday, 21st September 2025
Time: 2pm - 4pm (doors open 1:45pm)
Location: Malua Bay Community Centre (just next to the Malua Bay Tennis Courts)

Ticket Link in Bio

13/08/2025

Navigating the Care of Elderly Parents as We Age Ourselves
Balancing Compassion, Practicality, and Self-Care in the Later Chapters of Life

As the years pass, many of us find ourselves in a unique juncture: both we and our parents are aging, sometimes simultaneously entering stages of life that require increased attention, care, and adaptation.

The experience of managing the needs of older parents when we ourselves are no longer young introduces an array of emotional, physical, and logistical challenges that demand thoughtful consideration. This document explores strategies, insights, and reflections to help navigate this intricate journey.

For the full article, please see my Blog:

As the years pass, many of us find ourselves in a unique juncture: both we and our parents are aging, sometimes simultaneously entering stages of life that require increased attention, care, and adaptation. The experience of managing the needs of older parents when we ourselves are no longer young i...

28/07/2025

A person who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.

Knowing more about death – or ‘death literacy’ – can actually help quell fears of dying. An excerpt from an article in The Guardian.

Death is not a mystery. It is not a medical disaster. It is a bodily process, like giving birth or like going to the bathroom or coughing, your body knows what to do.

To some extent, each death is unique because it depends on a person’s age, health status and reason for dying, says Julie McFadden, a hospice nurse and online educator in Los Angeles, California. But for those unaffected by a traumatic event, such as a car accident, most people will experience certain stages and symptoms.

Months before death, the transition phase begins, says McFadden. This entails spending more time in bed, eating and drinking less, and needing more help with daily tasks such as getting dressed and going to the bathroom. During this time, it can be hard to keep up with conversations and sleep will take up most of the day.

Due to a lower food and beverage intake, at this point it’s possible to enter ketosis, a state in which the body burns fat for energy instead of glucose. Some people may experience pain relief or euphoria as a result, but it’s not entirely clear why. Some research suggests the neurotransmitter Gaba increases during ketosis, which makes you feel calm, while cortisol, the stress hormone, decreases.

Above all, “we are built for death just like we’re built for birth”, says McFadden. “The more we understand that, the better we will live – and the more peaceful we will die.”

To see this whole article from The Guardian, see:

Experts say knowing more about death – or ‘death literacy’ – can actually help quell fears of dying

12/06/2025

Do you have an older relative living down the South Coast?

Would you know who to contact if you need to arrange a funeral for them, come the time?

Tree of Life Funerals, South Coast NSW, is based in Batemans Bay and is privately and locally owned and operated by people who used to live in Canberra. We have many years of experience in providing funeral and end of life services. We love living on the coast and aim to provide our full range of services to everyone.

Tree of Life Funerals are partnered with Picaluna Beautiful Funerals and will give you and the people you care about personal, professional service, provided by empathetic and compassionate people.

You can hold a very simple funeral service or an elaborate one, it's your choice.

There is also a wide range of lovely, reasonably priced coffins including a choice of eco-friendly coffins.

We can also arrange funerals in Canberra and Queanbeyan with our local contacts and can organise mortuary transfers to and from the South Coast.

For further information, see www.treeoflifefunerals.com.au,
email treeoflifefunerals@outlook.com or phone 0493-276-554

09/06/2025

Friends are the family we choose.

Society exalts no institution higher than family. Of course, in individual situations, family warrants primacy.

But before we reflexively bow down before the hallowed institution of family, we should invoke our understanding that one size does not fit all.

Rather, you decide your life and what you consider primary because we choose our friends rather than having had them thrust upon us in the genetic and marital lotteries.

When someone we love dies, no matter if they are family or a friend, the grief is the same. I usually give special condolences to friends of the deceased during a funeral service because they are hurting just as much as any family member.

We often spend more time with friends, share more of ourselves, share so many of life’s experiences, and become closer than we were to any family member so when that friend is very sick, or diagnosed with a serious illness, or actually dies, our grief can be overwhelming.

When my beloved cousin died suddenly at only 57, I found I had to explain to people that “I loved him like a brother” before there was any inkling of understanding of why I was grieving so badly.

There was a recent article in a newspaper, titled “My best friend of 50 years knew me better than anyone. But when she died, no one seemed to take my grief seriously”, and this is what I’m talking about.

There is no special gauge which measures our grief or compares our grief, and there is no legitimacy in saying “my grief is worse than yours”.

Grief is our response to loss, loss of not only the person, or pet for that matter, but loss of our lives as we knew it, loss of what we thought our lives were going to be, loss of a shared future and it often reshapes how we see ourselves.

Grief is so complex and there are so many causes of grief, not just death or the prospect of death, and all I can say is, when you’re speaking to someone who is grieving, just be kind, if you can be anything, be kind.

Or if you’re grieving, be kind to yourself, acknowledge your pain, be your own best friend.

Losing someone you love really sucks, it doesn’t feel like it in the moment, but things will get better, your grief will ease over time, and if you need to talk to someone, please do it, even if it’s someone on the other end of a phone at Grief Australia https://www.grief.org.au/ because when we’re grieving, we need all the help we can get. Email: info@grief.org.au Phone: 1800 642 066

By Lauren Newman

Grief Australia: We are a leading voice on grief and bereavement, providing evidence-informed counselling, training, and research to collectively strengthen the nation’s response to grief.

09/06/2025

Experts say knowing more about death – or ‘death literacy’ – can actually help quell fears of dying. An excerpt from an article in The Guardian.

Death is not a mystery. It is not a medical disaster. It is a bodily process, like giving birth or like going to the bathroom or coughing, your body knows what to do.

To some extent, each death is unique because it depends on a person’s age, health status and reason for dying, says Julie McFadden, a hospice nurse and online educator in Los Angeles, California. But for those unaffected by a traumatic event, such as a car accident, most people will experience certain stages and symptoms.

Months before death, the transition phase begins, says McFadden. This entails spending more time in bed, eating and drinking less, and needing more help with daily tasks such as getting dressed and going to the bathroom. During this time, it can be hard to keep up with conversations and sleep will take up most of the day.

Due to a lower food and beverage intake, at this point it’s possible to enter ketosis, a state in which the body burns fat for energy instead of glucose. Some people may experience pain relief or euphoria as a result, but it’s not entirely clear why. Some research suggests the neurotransmitter Gaba increases during ketosis, which makes you feel calm, while cortisol, the stress hormone, decreases.

Above all, “we are built for death just like we’re built for birth”, says McFadden. “The more we understand that, the better we will live – and the more peaceful we will die.”

To see this whole article from The Guardian, see: https://www.theguardian.com/wellness/2025/may/29/what-happens-when-you-die

03/06/2025

Funeral Directors are human too. We have families and friends and go through all the things it is to be a human being.

We also care for the people who loved someone who took their own life. We see the pain, the trauma, and we feel it too.

I would rather listen to your story than have to conduct or attend your funeral.

Telling people you are in pain is not weakness, it's strength.
Talk to someone.

Start with one of these numbers - you can be anonymous - and be assured, no one is judging you.

22/05/2025

Death Conversation Cafe SPECIAL EVENT:
VOLUNTARY ASSISTED DYING IN NSW

Sunday 15th June, Bermagui Mens Shed, 2pm-4pm.

Please join Kerryn Davey and I for this very worthwhile opportunity to learn more about Voluntary Assisted Dying in NSW.

We are honoured to welcome a representative from the Southern NSW local health district VAD team to the Death Conversation Cafe. Our guest will share the eligibility requirements for VAD, related legislation information and will be available to answer any questions you have about VAD in NSW.

Tickets $5: https://events.humanitix.com/death-conversations-cafe-special-event-voluntary-assisted-dying-vad?hxchl=hex-qrc&hxref=evt

BOOK YOUR SPOT