12/11/2025
I share this in case it resonates with anyone out there.
I share this to perhaps cast some light on the truth that not all things remain the same.
And I acknowledge how it can feel so so much to be sinking into one’s own mind.
Sometimes I feel like I’m sinking inside my own mind — not because I want to, but because my thoughts pull me under like waves I can’t escape. They whisper too loudly, echoing in corners no one else can hear. It’s strange how you can look perfectly fine on the outside while your soul quietly shatters within. So, I smile when I’m supposed to. I laugh at the right moments. I nod, say I’m okay — because it’s easier to wear a mask than to explain the storm that never seems to end. It hasn’t stopped raining inside me for a long time; every night the thunder returns, and every morning I pretend it’s sunshine.
Loneliness doesn’t always knock — sometimes it just appears, like a shadow that follows too closely. And when it does, I find myself disappearing — not physically, but emotionally. I walk through crowds hoping no one really sees me, because if they did, they might notice the weight I’m carrying. I drift into quiet places where only the stars seem to understand what it means to ache silently. There’s comfort in that distance — a calm that comes when the world stops asking questions.
And yet, beneath all that sadness, there’s still a fragile hope — a belief that someday the rain will ease, and my heart will remember what warmth feels like. Maybe one morning, I’ll wake up and it won’t hurt to breathe. Maybe the silence won’t feel so heavy. Maybe the sun, after all this time, will finally find me again — not just to light the room, but to remind me that even the longest storms must eventually let go.
