14/12/2025
This screw tells the story of a new reality within myself, a new awareness & celebration of self.
The grass desperately needed a mow. My lawnmower stopped working half way through the front yard. The mower shop wasn’t able to fix it until next year. After asking and receiving information about where oil went in the mower, I managed to sort this situation out for myself, but the mower still wouldn’t start.
Normally this is the point where I would go into collapse, get really frustrated, expect someone to come rescue me and look outside myself for an answer. A freeze response is my automatic go to.
This time it was completely different. I broke a pattern.
I actually paused and looked to see if I could find the issue. I noticed that a bolt and a screw were missing so the petrol wasn’t reaching the motor. So I went off and found myself a bolt and some screws and fixed it myself.
A huge moment that made me so proud of myself. I had to rely on me today & I did it without missing a beat.
Now I have freshly mowed lawns alongside a deep pride and sense of self achievement.
This is a story of a nervous system that is coming into regulation after a very, very long time. A defining moment for me in my life that fills me with awe, pride & celebration.
It’s only in the last couple of months that I have felt my nervous system start to regulate. Normally this situation would send me straight into disregulation and freeze.
But this is my proof of the work I have done over the last few years, particularly this year.
I can’t actually believe that I have stepped into a space where I have a regulated nervous system that has changed my view of the world.
This is what I wish for everyone, this is what I want my work to be able to bring to women.
The point in their life when nervous system regulation feels like peace and the norm. Where it changes your ability to handle situations and innovate instead of collapse.
At this moment I am sitting with a heart full of joy and tears of gratitude in my eyes. I’m living with a new awareness of my ability and what I can now choose to do in my life and with my life.
It’s why I have been quiet in this space lately. I’ve been taking the time to get used to this new feeling. It’s taken awhile for my body to adjust, accept and recognise what this new state of being within myself is.