Alex Lightfoot Psychotherapist and Counsellor

03/09/2024

Are you conflict adverse?

Do you struggle to put yourself first - even at your own detriment? Is it hard for you to say 'no'?

If you answered 'YES' to any, or all, of these questions you probably struggle to create and maintain boundaries too.

You almost certainly feel like you never have enough time for yourself. That other people don't recognise what you sacrifice to help them.

Long term, this can create feelings of invalidation and resentment in relationships and create symptoms of burn-out and exhaustion.

Does this sound familiar?

Understanding that this type of behaviour, (often labelled as 'people pleasing'), is born out of a real FEAR can be the first step in challenging and changing the people pleasing process.

Common fears are; fear of rejection, fear of not being liked, fear of conflict and the fear of abandonment.

Thanks for reading,

Alex

13/08/2024

👋 This may seem to be a boring post however, I believe, it's a valuable piece of knowledge for you to have when considering which professionals you trust with your mental health.

Unfortunately, there are people out there (even well-meaning ones), claiming to be 'psychotherapists' and 'counsellors' without any standardised qualifications or expertise in the field. Recently, I saw someone on social media claiming they were a 'Human Behavioural Specialist' with no genuine accreditation or registration - just a sales-person marketing spiel and keywords.

🔍 Finding a practitioner to care for your mental health and well-being (as well as paying them a professional fee), should take more than just trust and marketing. In reality, those genuinely qualified have taken years of study to achieve accreditation and professional registration and continue to meet yearly standards to keep up with these requirements.

🥇The peak professional body here, the 'Psychotherapy and Counselling Federation of Australia' (PACFA) are now using digital badges to show the level of education and expertise of its members. These are the practitioners to look for and entrust with your mental health.

These badges aim to create a national standard for counselling and psychotherapy professionals which serve to inform and protect people like you when searching for a practitioner.

👩‍🎓Now you get to know who is qualified and registered when you want to find a mental health practitioner.

02/08/2024

Trauma doesn’t just interrupt connections with others, it can interrupt our relationship with ourselves. We can feel as if we don’t know ourselves, or even trust ourselves. We may feel alone even when we are in the company of others.

“Disconnected” is a term people frequently use in therapy to discuss their emotional state after trauma.

Finding space to acknowledge the traumatic event is often the first step in rebuilding our connection to self and recreating our self-trust.

19/10/2023

🖤💛❤️If you are an aboriginal or Torres Strait Islander looking for crisis support you can find it here at 13 YARN

https://www.13yarn.org

Call 13YARN (13 92 76) We are here to provide crisis support 24/7 to yarn with you without judgement and provide a confidential, culturally safe space to yarn about your needs, worries or concerns. We will work with you to explore options for on-going support. You know you will be connected to anoth...

31/07/2023

My mothers hydrangeas🪻

Particular items like flowers can invoke memories of another time, another place. A feeling or even a deeply buried thought rises. These can be embodied so deeply sometimes we are not sure when these feelings or thoughts became part of us.

Hydrangeas remind me of late summer, after Christmas when all the celebrations are done with, the new year has started but there’s a lull before the year gathers it force and pull us along it, washing us into the new routines and goals.

My mum grows these hydrangeas and, in late summer, snips their thick stalks to make a generous blue and purple bunch. Then she walks them to my door. They are always received with such love from me. So this memory, this flower, has a mothers generosity and love attached.

🩵

26/07/2023

Meet Stu,

He is a registered Counsellor specialising in addiction and youth work.

Stu is available Fridays and Saturdays at the Bowral practice.

For more info on Stu or to contact us go to
https://alexcounselling.com.au/

24/07/2023

Hands up anxiously attached folks ✋🏽(me included)!

Ever get the overwhelming desire to please everyone to keep the peace? To stop the ‘war’ inside your head and body as well as in your relationships? Me too. However, through the years I have found that this ‘need to please’ only gives me short-term relief. I usually wind up trying to make others happy to the detriment of my own inner peace. Through years of experience (and my own therapy), I have found multiple ways to find that inner peace again. It’s not always easy and it has taken practice and self-compassion - but it works. Good therapy can help change relationship patterns with others AND yourself. More peace, please. ☮️

01/05/2023

🍂Introducing Stu,

Stu has an empathetic, warm, and person-centered approach, aiming to provide his clients with a safe and collaborative space.

He provides treatment for a range of mental health difficulties and has a particular interest in substance use and the underlying path to addiction.

Stu has availability Mon-Fri after office hours (6-8pm)

For more information on Stuart you can visit our website or message us now

23/04/2023

🍂 And finally a website.

Hoping you are all well on this rainy Sunday evening.

Alex

Together, let's find out how.

25/02/2023

Wishing the Sydney LGBTQ community a very happy and Gay Christmas!
Forever your ally x

12/02/2023

Sometimes in our significant relationships, we get ‘stuck’ in a communication pattern that can make us feel frustrated, lonely, and unheard. We play the same role, saying the same things, and can feel completely lost when we keep getting the same outcomes.

Many of our communication patterns are learned in childhood with our primary care-givers. By adulthood, we have ‘learnt’ responses, some that no longer serve us. We want something different, something more in our relationships – but how do we get there?

By reflecting on those early relationships we can see where the old patterns are. Then we can start to chart a course away from these learned responses, toward growth and secure emotional attachments.

Here is where we develop as individuals as well as create stronger emotional bonds.