17/02/2025
A bit on internal dialogues. Have you ever wondered what they are?
I know that sometimes your mind feels like a crowded room, filled with voices pulling you in different directions. Some of those voices push you forward, telling you that youāre capable, strong, and resilient. Others whisper doubts, making you hesitate, second-guess yourself, or procrastinate until the weight of unfinished tasks becomes overwhelming.
This is your internal dialogue, the constant conversation between different parts of you.
Some voices are familiar, like an old friend reminding you of past successes. Others echo words you've heard before, from teachers, parents, or even fleeting moments of criticism that stuck longer than they should have. These internal dialogues shape how you see yourself, how you act, and how you react to the world.
Thereās the Motivator, the part of you that believes in your potential and encourages you to keep going, even when things feel difficult. It says, āYouāve done hard things before; you can do this again.ā
Then thereās the Doubter, the cautious voice that warns you about failure or embarrassment. Sometimes it tries to protect you, but other times it keeps you stuck, whispering things like, āYouāll mess this up,ā or āWhy even try?ā
And then thereās the Procrastinator, who convinces you that thereās always tomorrow. It tells you, āYouāre not in the right mood right now,ā or āYou work best under pressure anyway.ā But deep down, you know how exhausting it feels when tasks pile up.
Hereās the truth: You are not just one of these voices. You are the one listening to them. You get to decide which ones you give power to.
When the Doubter is loud, remind yourself: āI donāt have to be perfect; I just have to start.ā
When the Procrastinator takes over, tell it: āAction creates motivation, not the other way around.ā
And when the Motivator speaks, lean into it. Repeat what it says. Believe it.
You are not your worst thoughts. You are not defined by your hardest moments. You are the one in control of this dialogue, and with practice, you can make the loudest voice in your head one of kindness, encouragement, and self-trust.
Have you ever caught yourself dismissing your own feelings, second-guessing your experiences, or telling yourself that youāre "just overreacting"? Thatās called self-gaslighting, and it happens when you undermine your own emotions, thoughts, or memories, often without even realising it.
It might sound like this:
āIām probably just being too sensitive.ā
āMaybe I imagined itā¦ it wasnāt that bad.ā
āOther people have it worse. I should just get over it.ā
Self-gaslighting happens when you internalise doubt, often because of past experiences where your feelings werenāt validated. Maybe you grew up in an environment where you were told you were ātoo emotionalā or had your experiences minimised. Over time, you learned to silence yourself before anyone else could.
But hereās the thing: Your emotions are real. Your experiences matter. Your pain is valid. You donāt have to justify your feelings to anyone, including yourself.
Instead of dismissing your emotions, try this:
Pause and acknowledge: āIām feeling this way for a reason.ā
Reframe the thought: Instead of āMaybe Iām just overreacting,ā try āMy feelings are valid, and I deserve to explore them.ā
Talk to yourself with kindness: Imagine what you would say to a friend who felt this way. Now, say it to yourself.
You donāt need permission to trust yourself. You are allowed to believe in your own reality, to feel what you feel, and to give yourself the same understanding you so freely give others.
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