15/12/2023
I’ve been talking about relationships to quite a lot of people lately.
What seems really obvious to me is that we have to change our perception of what marriage or a long term relationship is about.
The old paradigm says that once we get married, we can relax the work on our relationships as we are now committed to each other and focus on other things - work, kids, survival etc.
I’ve been working with people and also couples around 20 years. This neglect in terms of truly investing and learning about relationships has resulted in majority of people in relationships I’ve witnessed, either losing their attraction to each other, having major conflicts in family life and with their children, growing apart as one starts to emotionally, mentally and spiritually develop him or herself and the other refuses, getting too meshed up in business together with no healthy boundaries between what is business and a relationship.
Having very little concept of healthy boundaries in a relationship and what that means. Not understanding or honouring each other’s journey. A real confusion between what is important for a feminine and a more masculine essenced person.
And more than anything a lack of understanding that there is an I, a you and an US in a relationship. This US is like a little bud, that has to be nurtured. It needs understanding of what is polarity in a relationship. It needs sensitivity. It needs absolute trust, love and intimacy - ‘into me you really see and into you I see’, to open up and flower.
Imagine if our paradigm in a relationship would be - how can we continue to learn more about what really works and continued to do everything we can especially after we are married or serious with each other to honour ourselves, and in particularly us with constant understanding, love, kindness, sensitivity and growth?
What if we were as motivated to grow our relationship as we are to make money, have sexual gratification, be seen as successful etc, what changes would we make?
What if we saw sacredness in the US. I wonder what our relationships would really be like? What if soul, spirit and evolution on a higher level came into all our relationships with others? What if we could understand more about destiny, forgiveness and what we are actually here to learn from each other?
I believe then our relationship would become more lasting, more caring, more awakened, more nourishing and more delicate.
I know that’s what I am aiming for and what I would love to see more people work towards.
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