Lovesong Global - Marnie Hoffrichter

02/12/2025

🖤 lovesongglobal advent of self truths 🖤

🖤 day #03 🖤 I belong 🖤

02/12/2025

🖤 lovesongglobal advent of self truths 🖤

🖤 day #02 🖤 I am loved 🖤

02/12/2025

🖤 lovesongglobal advent of self truths 🖤

🖤 day #01 🖤 I am me 🖤

02/12/2025

🖤 lovesongglobal advent of self truths 🖤

30/11/2025

🩷 hormones and neurodivergence 🩷

30/11/2025

🧡 healing from narcissistic abuse 🧡

27/11/2025

💙 trauma 💙 healing 💙

27/11/2025

🩷 let’s understand play therapy 🩷

25/11/2025

💜time in 💜 time out 💜

Tomorrow’s post will take a closer look at Time-In vs Time-Out — two approaches that shape a child’s emotional development in very different ways.

Many parents were raised with traditional time-outs, but we now understand far more about the developing brain, co-regulation, and the role of connection in calming the nervous system.

The visual below gives a simple overview of the differences.

Tomorrow, we’ll dive deeper into what these strategies actually teach a child, and why some approaches support long-term emotional regulation more effectively than others.


-regulation

25/11/2025

💜 masking 💜 coping 💜

Many children spend their day holding it together - smiling, complying, masking distress to stay 'okay. What looks calm can be the effort of survival.

When the mask slips at home, it's not manipulation - it's release. It's safety.
Understanding the difference changes everything.

Explore Masking: The Toolkit for Parents & Educators — your guide to recognising the signs, reducing the strain, and helping a child feel safe enough to be real. Link in comments or via Linktree Shop in Bio.

Contented Child, Child Wellbeing Consultancy

Regulation

25/11/2025

💜 time in 💜 connection 💜 leading with love 💜

Time-out has been used for decades, but what we now understand about the developing brain tells a very different story. When a child is overwhelmed, distressed, or dysregulated, sending them away doesn’t teach calm — it removes the support their nervous system desperately needs.

Today’s visual explores why time-out is considered outdated, what the science of co-regulation shows us, and how connection-focused approaches build genuine emotional skills rather than simply stopping behaviour in the moment.

Managing Big Feelings, a Toolkit for Parents & Educators available at link in comments ⬇️ or via our Linktree Shop in Bio. Instant electronic download with secure global checkout, handled by Stripe.


-regulation

25/11/2025

💜 accepting self is a powerful and precious gift 💜

When You Expect Yourself to Be Different Than Who You Are 😣

Let’s talk about what happens inside of us when we expect ourselves to be different than who we actually are.

You know those thoughts…
💭 I should be more this…
💭 I shouldn’t be like that…
💭 If I were different, life would be better…

These messages tell us that who we are, as we are, isn’t enough.

And when we believe them, we create an inner conflict—a battle between our authentic self and a fantasy version of who we think we should be.

What Happens in the Body When We Reject Ourselves

The moment we compare ourselves to this fantasy self, our nervous system registers it as a threat.

🔥 One response? Sympathetic activation (fight/flight):

Agitation, tension, anxiety
Restlessness, irritability, overworking
Pushing through, even when overwhelmed
A feeling of needing to “fix” ourselves
🧊 The other response? Dorsal vagal (collapse/immobilization):

Withdrawal, numbness, exhaustion
Self-doubt, hopelessness, depression
A sense of disconnect from ourselves
A feeling of needing to “fix” ourselves (... yes, it’s both)
Why?

Because our authentic self is fighting to be seen, to be accepted, to be enough.

What If This Is All Just Feedback?

What if instead of seeing these reactions as something bad, we recognized them as feedback?

⚡ A signal that we’re at war with ourselves.
⚡ A sign that we’ve lost connection with self-acceptance.
⚡ An invitation to return to congruence—to stop fighting who we are and start embracing it instead.

The Shift: Choosing Self-Acceptance

Next time you hear yourself say:
❌ “I should be different.”
❌ “I should know more, do more, be more.”
❌ “I’m not enough as I am.”

Pause and ask:

💡 Where is this message coming from?
💡 What would happen if I stopped fighting myself?
💡 Can I give myself permission to be exactly who I am—right now?

Because your nervous system isn’t working against you—it’s working hard to bring you back to yourself.

✨ Your job? Listen. ✨

Much love on the journey 💜

Lisa