Petra Baumgart - PsychoChange Therapist

24/03/2026

Did you know you can do your appointment from the comfort of your home? Well, you can 🙂

Online appointments are via video call, they’re as effective as face to face appointments.

At this time, when we’re all thinking about outgoing costs and travel etc I completely understand wanting to cut back where we can. If you’d prefer to do your therapy from home, we can arrange that - no problem at all.

Also, a little reminder - I offer payment plans too, this allows my clients to pay off sessions according to their budget. I don’t want financial commitments to limit your ability to get the help you need so we can also work around that.

If you’d like more info about online sessions or my payment plans please feel free to reach out.

23/03/2026

This is one of the most powerful (and hardest) pieces of relationship advice you'll ever hear. It flips the entire script on how most people handle conflict.

What "winning" an argument actually looks like in practice:
- Scoring points
- Proving the other person wrong
- Getting the last word
- Making them admit they're at fault
- Feeling superior or "right"
- Using logic, facts, tone, or sarcasm to dominate

The moment you treat the conversation like a debate or a court case, you've already shifted from partner to opponent.

Truth is -
Even if you "win" — you lose.

- You might force them to back down, but you create resentment.
- You might be factually correct, but emotionally disconnected.
- You might feel smart for 5 minutes, but the relationship feels a little colder afterward.

When one person wins the argument, the relationship loses trust, safety, and closeness.

The better goal: Understanding instead of victory

Shift your entire mindset from:
- "How do I prove I'm right?"
to
- "What is my partner actually feeling and needing right now?"

Why understanding > winning

People don't argue because they're irrational — they argue because they feel misunderstood.
Most fights aren't really about the dishes, the money, or who forgot what. They're about:
→ "I feel unimportant to you."
→ "I feel criticised and unsafe."
→ "I feel like my needs don't matter."

If you address the *feeling* underneath the content, the surface issue often dissolves.

Understanding doesn't mean agreeing.
You can fully understand someone's perspective and still have a different one. The magic is that once someone feels deeply understood, they're far more willing to hear your side without defensiveness.

It builds emotional safety.
When your partner knows that even in conflict, your priority is connection rather than conquest, they stop walking on eggshells. They open up more. They trust you with their real feelings.

❤️ How to actually do this (practically)

- Pause and ask yourself: “Am I trying to win right now, or understand?"
- Use curiosity questions:
- "Can you tell me more about why this bothers you?"
- "What do you need from me in this situation?"
- "How are you feeling about what happened?"
- Reflect back what you hear:
"It sounds like when I did X, you felt dismissed and hurt. Did I get that right?"
- Drop the need to correct them in the moment. You can share your perspective *after* they feel heard.
- Remember: Being "right" is cheap. Being connected is rare and valuable.

A powerful reframe:

Think of every argument as a team problem to solve — not a battle where there's a winner and a loser.

You're not opponents.
You're two people who love each other, stuck in a painful moment, trying to find your way back to each other.

The person who "wins" the argument is usually the one who makes sure both of you feel heard and cared for.

When you do that consistently, something beautiful happens: fights become shorter, rarer, and actually bring you closer instead of pushing you apart.

That's how strong, mature relationships work. Not because there are no disagreements — but because disagreements stop being wars. They become opportunities for deeper understanding.

23/03/2026

The emotion of the day (or week) is empathy.

Empathy - the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another.

Empathy is a nice thing to have. Everyone’s lived experience is very different so it can be hard to feel empathic when you haven’t experienced certain things, in those case where you can’t relate you can empathise through support.

Discrediting someone else’s feelings will only create rifts and distance.

Anyway, it’s nice to sometimes step out of your own experiences and support others through theirs.

22/03/2026

Another boring commitment ceremony.

Let’s just go over the ones that kind of had something to say.

Scott & Gia - Scotty finally had the courage to speak up and look I fully understand why it’s held his tongue until now. Like all the situations Gia has been involved in, Scott won’t be out of the firing line. He’s for sure copped emotional manipulation behind closed doors. It wouldn’t surprise me if she starts to pull back now, simply because he’s voiced his opinion.

Sam & Chris - these guys should’ve went home and saved everyone some time. I get Sam’s reason for wanting to stay but I also feel Chris will be mean to him this week because of it. Sometimes things just simply don’t work and that’s ok.

Bec & Danny - Danny’s still just waiting for the whole thing to be over. Don’t ask him any questions about anything it’s just all a bit awkward. Like Scott, he’s scared and fair enough. Bec hasn’t really handled anything well, that does make it tricky to communicate.

So same, same really.

Everyone else stays. We’re on the home straight. Married At First Sight Australia

22/03/2026

Grateful files ‘26 - vol 12

Slow Sunday mornings, collaboration, expansion, personal development, a clear mind.

21/03/2026

Relationship issues and breakdowns aren’t a one party problem to solve, both parties play a part.

We have a responsibility to ourselves and our relationship to understand what that part is and how to heal those things.

Every single relationship takes work. Life is ever evolving, as are we and that flows into our personal connections. Very often I hear people complaining about their partners actions/reactions and behaviours without understanding or taking responsibility for their own through the process.

I successfully work with couples because I believe the work starts with us individually.

Couples therapy is hugely beneficial, a third party perspective is helpful to navigate through those perpetual issues and challenges.

If you feel like your relationship is at the point of needing some outside insight please reach out and we can discuss your options 🫶

18/03/2026

Surely we haven’t got many more of these to suffer through? MAFS dinner party recap.

I’d like to start with a PSA for all those bullies out there. If nothing else, this season has put a massive spotlight on how foul that behaviour is. If any part of your day to day life includes purposely hurting someone else - you’re an idiot and you need to do some serious self reflection and self work. Case in point - Gia and Bec.

Ok, let’s continue …

We’re all aware tonight will be Alissa’s time to shine and honestly, it’s time to take note. This girl has held herself so well through this entire s**t storm.

Chris & Sam - Sam is emotionally intelligent. Chris is Gia’s friend, enough said.

Viewing perspectives instead of instantly picking sides and piling on is a cool awareness to have.

Alissa and Bec - Bec loves shifting blame without ever fully taking accountability.
APOLOGIES WITHOUT CHANGED BEHAVIOUR MEANs ZILCH.

Gia speaking to camera about Bec not taking accountability - LOL

Alissa handled it very well, containing her emotions is admirable. Drawing a line in the sand is the best way to handle bullies.

Back to Sam and Chris. Chris trying to control the situation shows exactly where their problems are. It’s him guys.
Walk away Sam, you’ll be so ok.
Chris and Gia laughing - yuck.

Who on earth does Gia think she is though?! Far out she’s horrendously horrible.

Danny speaking up - thank the lord.

Gia tells so many porkie pies, so many. It’s actually all she does everything that comes out of her mouth is untrue.

Trying to break down the psychology of Bec, I feel like she never got enough attention as a kid. Shes got to be in literally every situation, even when it’s moved on or not even about her.

Danny has been incredibly patient with her. She is so needy, like actually.

lol her getting the s**ts and walking out when Danny mentions his frustrations - 🥴 bro, I can’t.

Oh look, it’s bedtime. Thank gawd.

Married At First Sight Australia

18/03/2026

See you there!

Cooran… it’s time to celebrate! 🎉

All five spaces at The Mill Studios are now home to incredible local businesses, and they're throwing open the doors so you can come explore what’s been growing here.

Join us Sunday March 22 from 8:30am for a day filled with movement, music, wellness and community connection.

✨ Kids & teen dance workshops
✨ Yoga & Ecstatic Dance
✨ Community acupuncture
✨ Live music
✨ Poppins Drink Bar morning party
…and more surprises through the day.

This is a day to enjoy the studios, meet the beautiful humans behind the businesses, try something new, and celebrate our little village.

Bring your friends, bring the kids, grab a drink, and come see what The Mill is all about.

30 King Street, Cooran
Sunday March 22
From 8:30am

💛 Please share this post and help us spread the word.

Let’s show up for our local businesses and make it a day to remember.

Let’s party Cooran! 🎶🌿

And follow these guys for more 👇🏼

Poppins QLD
Sage & Stone Therapies
Petra Baumgart - PsychoChange Therapist
Soul Wellness
Love Pachamama
Wild Performing Arts

17/03/2026

Workplace edition and one reason I work with business owners to better improve mindset and behaviours in their staff.

The One Bad Apple That Ruins the Whole Orchard

We all know the proverb: one bad apple spoils the bunch.

In the workplace, it’s not a proverb. It’s physics.

A single toxic personality doesn’t just “have a bad day.” They become gravity. Everything and everyone starts orbiting their negativity until the entire system collapses inward.

You’ve seen it. You’ve potentially been a part of it.

The colleague who weaponises silence in meetings so no one dares speak up.
The manager whose “feedback” is thinly veiled contempt and ridicule.
The perpetual victim who turns every task into a personal betrayal.
The gossip who doesn’t just share rumours — they manufacture them like oxygen, and suddenly trust evaporates overnight.

At first, the damage looks small. A quiet team lunch. One person calling in sick more often. A talented staff member polishing their résumé on company time.

But watch what happens next:

Morale doesn’t dip — it flatlines.
Productivity doesn’t slow — it becomes performative theatre.
Innovation dies because no one risks looking stupid in front of the rotten apple.
The best people don’t “quiet quit.” They loud exit — taking institutional knowledge, client relationships, and cultural memory with them. This costs time and money.

And here’s the part nobody wants to say out loud:

The bad apple doesn’t succeed alone.
They succeed because the rest stay silent. They also recruit those who can’t speak for themselves.
Because leadership confuses “keeping the peace” with “enabling poison.”
Because management files another generic complaint and calls it “resolved.”
Because we convince ourselves “it’s not that bad” until the whole barrel is rotting.

One toxic person can destroy what took years to build. Not because they’re superhuman — but because human beings are wired for connection, and connection is fragile. Once fear and resentment replace psychological safety, the orchard is already lost.

So the real question isn’t “How do we fix the bad apple?”

It’s: How long will we keep pretending one apple can’t spoil everything — and what are we willing to do when we finally admit it can?

I work with managers, business owners and CEO’s to help w**d out the bad apples and get everyone working together as a team, for the greater good.

17/03/2026

Living in the ‘hope’ of someone changing or becoming someone we want them to be will inevitably leave you very disappointed. Truth is, someone can and will only ‘change’ on their own terms at their own time frame - if at all.

This ‘hope’ shows up a lot in our personal relationships. The hope that someone will go back to who they were when we first met or the hope they’ll become what we need them to be or the hope that they’ll be what we see their potential to be. Again, these are our hopes projected onto someone else.

Very often people will show you their capabilities. They’ll show you what changes they’re willing to make, how they show up emotionally and mostly all they’ll offer. Commonly, we choose to ignore the things they do show us - because we’re living in hope.

You then get to make a choice. If the continued behaviours are things you in fact can’t work with you need to make a choice. You have a responsibility to yourself.

‘Hope’ is a wonderful thing to have but there’s for sure times where it’ll simply keep you in lala land. Stepping out of it for a moment, take off your rose coloured glasses and view your reality and those in it for what it is.

16/03/2026

My daughter has been a major motivator of mine. My learnings and want to improve greatly increased after I became her mother. Here are a few things I want her to know (and obviously share with her personally) but might also be useful for other parents-

Your value is not something you have to audition for -
You are already enough—exactly as you are right now—before you achieve anything, look any particular way, get chosen by anyone, or prove anything to the world. People who try to make you earn your worth are usually trying to control you. Walk away from any relationship or environment that makes you audition for basic respect and love.

“No” is a complete sentence -
You don’t owe anyone an explanation, a softener, a smile, or a justification when you don’t want something—whether it’s physical touch, a date, a favour, extra work, or staying in a conversation that feels wrong. A clear “no” followed by silence is powerful. Practice it until it feels as natural as breathing.

Kind people can still have very strong boundaries -
Being compassionate does not mean being endlessly available, being the emotional sponge for everyone, or letting people cross your lines because “they’re going through something.” You can be warm and still say: “That doesn’t work for me.” Kindness + boundaries is not contradiction—it’s maturity.

Learn to recognise the difference between intensity and intimacy -
Drama, jealousy, big gestures, constant reassurance-seeking, push-pull behaviour, possessiveness—these things feel like love because they feel big. They are usually not. Real intimacy usually feels calm, safe, respectful, and boringly consistent more than it feels like a rollercoaster. Trust your nervous system when it says “this feels peaceful” over when it says “this feels electric.”

You are allowed to change your mind about who you want to be -
The girl you are at 14, 18, 22, 30, 45—none of them have to be the final version. You can outgrow people, beliefs, careers, cities, versions of femininity, even parts of your own personality. Changing direction when you realise something no longer fits is not failure or disloyalty; it is courage. Give yourself permission to evolve without apology.

🤍

Your life experience is different to your child’s life experience. There’s no shame in sharing your lessons and learnings, they’ll also have their own. Guidance is useful and letting our kids know we all make mistakes also helps them to understand we can fall at times but we continue on.