Finding Beautiful

24/07/2023

💪🏼💥✨

30/04/2023

Love this! 👏

I wear a size 16.

My belly is squishy and bears the stretch marks of the babies I carried more than a few years ago.

I took a style & fit inventory for a subscription box last week and they informed me that my body is shaped like a raindrop. Come to think of it, that was true even 15 years and 30 pounds ago.

The last time I was at the doctor, I asked him about a spot on my skin and he just smiled and told me it’s an age spot. Cool. Cool.

My thighs cover a lot of ground when I sit down.

I’ve got a red birthmark up the middle of my forehead that the doc told my parents would fade when I was a baby. It didn’t.

My skin tone can best be described as Irish pale, freckled, aging, sensitive, and au naturel.

If I had to guess, I’d say I’m about 25 pounds heavier than the charts say I should be.

Oh, and one more thing…

When the sun is out, you’ll find me in one of the super cute plus-sized bathing suits that I bought at Walmart. I’ll be slathered in sunscreen and wearing long-last lipstick that makes me feel pretty. You’ll know it’s me because I’ll be cheering for my kid as she yells, “Mom! Watch this!” and jumps off the diving board for the 1,000th time. My husband will come outside to “tell me something," but we’ll both know he’s just checking me out. And I'll let him. The only thing I’ll be worried about at the pool is how much more sweet tea I can drink without having to wiggle out of that cute new suit for a potty break.

I am both imperfect AND happy to be me.

For a long time, I thought I had to either learn to love every bit of my body or figure out how to change it. So I spent a lot of time trying to change the parts that I thought I could and some more time stewing on how a woman could genuinely love her stretch marks and cellulite. I’ve long since put down that lie because guess what? I don’t love every little thing about me that you could put under a microscope.

But I do love me.

The truth is that my inherent value, satisfaction with life, contribution to the world, worthiness to be loved, and overall happiness have pretty much nothing to do with what I look like in a mirror. Go figure.

Do you know what looks better on my raindrop-shaped body than any single digit size, perfect skin tone, or thin thighs?

Joy.
Happiness.
Contentment.
Laugh lines.
Peace.

All I’m saying is you can live your life, friend. Starting today. Go ahead and keep working toward being the best version of yourself, but don’t forget that today’s version is pretty great. Yes, even with dimply thighs.

Shared with permission from Mandy McCarty Harris, Writer

18/08/2022

The way people behave has to do with:

1. Their ability to regulate their own emotions
2. The communication style they were modeled
3. The core beliefs they have about themselves
4. Their own self image
5. The way they perceive the world around them (based on their past)

As a culture, we tend to take people’s behavior extremely personal. This is the ego at work. Believing everything someone does is a reflection of who we are. It’s not.

It’s a reflection of who they are. Or, more accurately: who they have *learned* to be.

Human beings are walking projectors. Projecting their own internal world, externally.

This is why becoming conscious or waking up is so important.

It allows us to take responsibility for our own wounding so we aren’t moving through live unconsciously hurling our pain at anyone within our path.

As always, a reminder: because someone’s behavior isn’t personal + because it comes from a place of pain doesn’t mean we allow it. Boundaries are important. I explain a lot about human behavior + a lot of the “why” (it mostly boils down to early attachment where our entire personality is developed.)

Adults are fully responsible for their behavior regardless of their background. We all have an opportunity to heal

18/07/2022

In an Instagram world where movement and noise have taken over, be still and observe the precious small things, the natural things, the tiny moments of quiet.

04/02/2022

💙💚💛

28/02/2021

Something for all you amazing goddesses to reflect on under this full moon energy. Here lies exposed the standards, expectations, perceptions and beliefs that we as women might encounter and somehow have to make sense of and navigate through in our lives. So crazy! So many double standards and confusing messages. Some of these we have control over, some we don’t. Some are messages that keep us ‘buying’ into certain beauty standard that makes others a lot of money. Some are based on serious societal issues we need to continue addressing as a collective.

How have these things impacted you, your choices in life, and your understanding of yourself? What expectations/imposed beliefs are still holding you back or affecting your choices? Who might you be if you could just be you on your terms? This is the perfect year to let go of what no longer serves you. Lean into that, breathe in the energy of expansion, breathe out the stagnant energy of old beliefs. Only you can change the way you live.

Big love to you all,

Mandy 🦋

Be a lady they said. Your skirt is too short. Your shirt is too low. Your pants are too tight. Don’t show so much skin. Don’t show your thighs. Don’t show your breasts. Don’t show your midriff. Don…

14/02/2021

Happy ❤️ day! It’s so wonderful to have people who love us and show us that they do, but it’s even better if we love ourselves and show ourselves that we do 😉🤗

11/02/2021

I was taught early in life that hard work was everything. I come from hard working people who valued hard work above anything. Work hard, do more, produce more, achieve more, work harder, work more. This was apparently the way to get what you want (or what others think you should want 😉).

I still work hard, but these days I understand that I can be just as productive by working less. I know how important it is to have balance in life, and how much this can contribute to working effectively, creatively, intuitively and happily! And as women, we also need to be aware that our behaviour patterns are much more cyclical, with natural ebb and flow. Tuning into this can be soooo beneficial.

Of course I sometimes slip back into old habits (yep, did that last year quite a bit). But my soul soon screams at me that it needs more downtime, more peace, more time in nature, more fun and laughter, more rest, more exercise, more juicy goodness.

What are you doing this year to find balance?

Mandy 🦋

(Sorry - don’t know who to credit this image to. How good is it! ❤️)

02/02/2021

So it’s taken a month, but I’ve finally picked my word for this year. FUN! I’ve realised that even though I enjoy many aspects of my work, over the past couple of years I haven’t allowed enough time for doing other fun stuff. I’ve filled my days with tasks, and during tough times (like last year 😳) this kept me going, or at least at some level I felt if I just kept doing things, just kept moving, things would be OK. I didn’t have time to fall in a heap - I had things to do! And I was one of the lucky ones - I still had paid work and I live in a relatively safe place pandemic wise. But there was soooooo much sadness very close to me personally that took its toll, and very little opportunity to get together with people or get away to do fun things. Things were heavy, really heavy. The energy was incredibly draining. There just wasn’t much fun.
This year I’ve actually timetabled in days/times for FUN! Any kind of fun - from the frivolous/ridiculous to just the things that really bring me joy. I’m taking more time out. My mind, body and spirit have been screaming at me to do this - finally I’m listening. I want to smile more and laugh more. I want feel light and move with a spring in my step. I want to find my sense of humour (which somehow got lost last year) and spread joy. This year I plan to find beautiful by having lots more FUN - yay! Who’s with me?
Mandy 🦋

28/12/2020

Was thinking about all the ‘secret diets’ that humans all around the world will be starting in approximately four days time, and wanted to share a little excerpt from an article I wrote a year ago for Sunday Life.

Just a reminder I guess that if your head is going to ‘2021 Goals’ with secret-weight-related-goals-even-though-you-are-trying-to-love-yourself-at-every-size, be kind. You haven’t done anything ‘wrong’. It makes perfect sense for our human brains to long for agency or control around the size of our bodies, particularly in a world like this, particularly after a year like this. No shame in that.

But what if we just went ahead - today - and gave ourselves permission to show up IN FULL, regardless of our size or our weight on the scale?

You may not feel this right now but so many people need and benefit from that special sparkle that only you can bring.

Let us see you.

Let us know you.

Right here right now as you are, you are more powerful and beautiful than you know.

Step into your boldness, my beauties.

Or... don’t! That’s okay too!

We have options.

We are not stuck.

Our stories matter.

CB xo

24/10/2020

How are you going? 2020 has been a tough ride, hasn’t it. I can certainly relate to this photo on a personal level. As the world at large and our own communities try to keep up with the challenges of the pandemic, we are having to continually make adjustments and find some normality. We are constantly living with a heightened sense of fear and our bodies and minds are on high alert. Our brains are completely overloaded with information. There hasn’t been a lot of great news to lift us up. For many there hasn’t been much joyous and fun connection with others that’s so important for our mental health. And we are tired. Just tired.
Other than getting good sleep when you can, what else can you do?
1. Be kind to yourself - you don’t have to have it all together. Nobody really does, despite how it might appear.

2. Allow time to do things that bring you joy. Whatever that is - do it!

3. Take a media holiday. Turn off the news. Stay informed but don’t get caught up in all the ‘bad’ news.

4. Try to eat healthfully and move your body. Don’t beat yourself up when you don’t (remember point 1), but these things can have a positive impact on your mental health.

5.Reach out! Let someone know if you are struggling. If it’s too hard to have that conversation with people you’re close to, seek out a professional. Having someone objective to talk to can really put things in perspective.
Please know you are not alone and there is always someone who can help ❤️
Mandy 🦋