Joyful Being

15/09/2025

Menopause is often talked about as a “hormone problem.” But research shows it’s much more than that. Psychologists are now reframing menopause as a developmental life stage—just like adolescence.

What this means:
🌱Menopause isn’t only about physical changes. It also involves identity shifts, role transitions, and meaning-making.
🌱Many women describe a sense of “not feeling like myself.” This often includes:
• Burnout or exhaustion
• Mood fluctuations
• Cognitive changes (memory, concentration)
• Relationship strain or re-evaluation
• Old trauma or unresolved stress resurfacing
• Loss of identity after years of “masking” (especially for late-diagnosed ADHD/autism)

The research tells us:
🌱Menopause is linked with identity disruption and a need to reconstruct one’s sense of self.
🌱The pressure and external messaging from society to stay productive, selfless, and compliant adds to stress and internal conflict
🌱Positive beliefs about menopause can protect wellbeing, while negative beliefs can increase distress.
🌱 Many women experience this stage as a gateway to re-embodiment—a time to reclaim autonomy, shift priorities, and reconnect with authenticity…..perhaps for the first time ever.

Core psychological tasks of menopause include:
🌱Disentangling from old roles and expectations that no longer serve
🌱Re-evaluating values and priorities in life
🌱Rebuilding identity with greater authenticity
🌱Integrating new ways of being that support health, relationships, and meaning in a healthy way

Why this matters:

When we understand menopause as a normal psychological transition, not just a medical problem, women can receive the support they need. This recognition allows menopause to become a time of growth, empowerment, and flourishing rather than simply loss or decline.

💡 Key message: Menopause is not only a physiological change—it’s a psychological turning point. With awareness, knowledge and the right support, it can be a powerful stage of renewal and identity reconstruction for women.

Credit: Concepts and research presented by Kirstin Bouse, . Kirstin is doing fabulous work in this space and I highly recommend following her 🌱

28/08/2025

Motherhood is the time women are most likely to struggle with their mental health. And when there’s no village around you, the struggle can feel even heavier.

Part of the problem is that so many spaces don’t support mother and baby to both have their needs met. Mothers are often feel societal expectations to keep babies quiet, feed discreetly, and often to be apart for appointments- even when separation feels biologically stressful for both of you.

That’s not how it works here. In my therapy room, you don’t need to apologise for mothering. Babies cry, feed, wriggle, and need to be held—that’s normal. We can make space for both your needs and your baby’s.

I’ll hold your baby if you need the toilet. I’ll grab you water. We can pause for feeds, changes, and settling. And if you’d rather come alone and soak up the chance to just be you—that’s supported too.

You do you. This is your space—for both of you. 💜

08/08/2025

This World Breastfeeding Week, let’s move beyond pressure and personal guilt — and look at what actually shapes breastfeeding outcomes: policies, workplace expectations, and social supports.

🍼 In Australia, government-funded parental leave ends around 3–4 months postpartum. While many families stretch that leave using unpaid time or personal savings, it’s often a financial squeeze — not a true choice.

🍼 In Norway, parents are supported with up to 59 weeks of paid leave — and over 75% are still breastfeeding (to some extent) at 6 months.

🍼 In the US, where there’s no national paid leave, many parents are back at work within weeks — and breastfeeding drop-off is steep.

These numbers aren’t about how hard parents tried.
They’re about the conditions we’re asking them to parent in.

🤍 You are not less if you didn’t keep breastfeeding.
🤍 You did what you had to, within the system you’re in.
🤍 You deserved more support — not more pressure.

And yes — of course there will be many nuances to these numbers that cannot truly be reflected and captured in an Instagram post.

Every family’s feeding story is shaped by personal, cultural, medical, and emotional factors.

But too often, we treat breastfeeding as a personal success or failure —
when it’s deeply shaped by the systems around us.

Let’s stop asking: “Why didn’t you keep going?”
Let’s start asking: “What support was missing for you”

07/08/2025

Breastfeeding isn’t always a Pinterest-perfect bonding moment. Sometimes it’s boring. Sometimes it’s sensory hell. And sometimes it feels like the entire mental load of the household is crushing you while you sit on the couch, “resting.”

You are not broken for feeling this way.

These strategies aren’t about “making it all okay” with toxic positivity.

They’re survival tools for the trenches—while we work on shifting the bigger systems that leave breastfeeding parents so unsupported.

Which of these strategies do you already use?
Which one are you going to try next time you’re stuck on the couch with a baby attached to you?
Let’s share the hacks that actually help.

And if you need further support .with.bec and I are here for you 🧡

06/08/2025

Breastfeeding is often painted as this magical, instinctive act of bonding. But inside the therapy room? The conversations are a little more honest.

✨ It’s a skill that requires practice, not something that always comes “naturally.”
✨ You can be grateful for the opportunity and still feel overwhelmed, bored, or touched-out.
✨ The emotional labour of feeding can feel invisible, even though it’s relentless.
✨ And if your journey didn’t involve breastfeeding, this can stir up complicated feelings. Your story is valid, too.

Feeding your baby—however that looks—is deeply personal. There’s no one “right” way to feel about it. It’s okay if it’s messy, nuanced, and layered.

You’re doing the work, whatever it looks like.
Feeding is one part of the story. Showing up for your baby—in any way—is what truly matters.

💕 In the next post, I’ll be sharing strategies for when breastfeeding feels boring, overstimulating, and like the entire mental load is sitting on your chest.
Stay tuned—it’s not about “just being grateful” or “enjoying the moment.” You deserve real tools.

31/07/2025

Hey lovely humans and trauma-informed clinicians—this one’s for you:

We are on the lookout for an experienced Perinatal Psychologist with a passion for working collaboratively in a multidisciplinary team, and who brings EMDR experience to the table.

If you have a warm presence, an easy sense of humour, and the ability to support people through the messy, magical, sometimes terrifying journey of pregnancy, birth, postpartum and early parenting—keep reading.

🧡 Who You Are:

A registered psychologist (or equivalent) with specialised experience in perinatal mental health

Trained in EMDR and confident in applying it around pregnancy, birth-related trauma, and transition to parenthood

A team player: you thrive in multidisciplinary settings (think obstetricians, midwives, lactation consultants, GPs)

Warm, grounded, non‑judgmental, and able to hold space with both empathy and sass

Ready to co‑design treatment plans, consult with allied health colleagues, and advocate for holistic care

🧡 What We Offer:

A flexible, supportive environment, where your voice matters

A multi‑professional team dedicated to supporting parents in every way—from emotional healing to parenting challenges

A platform for creativity in therapy, with opportunities to contribute to workshops, group programs, and educational content

Opportunities for clinical supervision, case‑consultation, and growth in perinatal/infant mental health

📩 Sound like your kind of work?
Slide into our DMs or email hello@joyfulbeing.com.au with:
🗂 A brief bio/CV
💡 A snapshot of your EMDR & perinatal experience
💬 Why you vibe with a practice that’s warm, real, and deeply collaborative

29/07/2025

🎂 Happy 2nd Birthday to This Wild Little Practice 🎂

Two years ago, I rented a single room and brought a big dream (and zero clients) to life.

Since then,
🧡 I’ve moved to join and his incredible team at The Epworth Hospital
🧡 Moved again just 3 months later into with who is amazing!
🧡 Rebranded, redesigned, reprinted, and reexplained everything to my accountant (who is still quietly stressed and doesn’t get all the change in such a short period of time)
→ Stayed up so late working behind the scenes managing every practice move
→ Cried over website edits, technology and the nonstop admin
→ Hired admin support. Mel is my hero 🦸‍♂️
→ Welcomed a brilliant colleague .with.bec who truly is the best 🧡
→ And built something that feels like home — to me, and to the families we care for

Every one of those changes meant more work.
More chaos. More uncertainty.
But I couldn’t unsee the power of truly shared care.
Collaboration across disciplines = better outcomes, every single time.

What I didn’t expect was how hard it would hit me
seeing families receive such powerful, protective care. It stirred up grief I hadn’t fully met yet.

I saw what I missed. What I needed. What I should have had during my pregnancy loss.

So I went back to therapy.
To tend to that pain.
To honour it.
To let it reshape me — not harden me.

That grief? It cracked me open again.
And it also made me better.
It reminds me every day why this work matters.

My past doesn’t hold me back —
It helps me hold others better

This isn’t a story of scaling fast or making it sound glamorous.
It’s a story of staying close to my values, even when the business advice said otherwise.
It’s a story of healing while holding space.
Of building something fierce and kind and sustainable. My way.

🩷 Joyful Being is 2. And she’s just getting started.……

24/07/2025

When I became a mum, I was shocked by how rarely these things were said out loud.

As a psychologist, I’d heard them in therapy rooms for years.
But in real life? In mothers’ groups? At the playground?
Silence. Smiles. Maybe a quiet “same” over coffee if you were lucky.

These five truths came up again and again in sessions this week — and they deserve more space.

Let’s make it normal to speak honestly about this season.
Let’s have real conversations.
Let’s stop pretending this is easy.

23/07/2025

14/07/2025

It’s Birth Trauma Awareness Week, and I want to gently name something I see all the time in my work with new mothers:

So many don’t realise they’ve experienced birth trauma.
They just think they’re failing.

👉 “I couldn’t relax.”
👉 “I didn’t feel connected.”
👉 “I was always on edge.”
👉 “I felt nothing—or way too much.”
👉 “Everyone said the baby was fine, so why wasn’t I?”

But these aren’t signs you’re a bad mother.
They’re often signs of a nervous system in survival mode.
They’re trauma responses—not personal flaws.

Sometimes birth doesn’t just bring a baby—it brings up everything your body has held for years.
Especially if you grew up with emotional neglect, chaos, or fear (what we call ACEs—Adverse Childhood Experiences).

💛 If your birth felt bigger, scarier, or harder to recover from than you expected—there’s a reason.
And you are not alone.

This is a big part of the work I do: helping mothers understand what’s actually going on beneath the overwhelm.
And walking with them toward healing that feels safe, steady, and real.

💛 You deserve to feel well—not just functional.

13/06/2025

🤰 Scan coming up? You’re not alone if your body’s already bracing.

For many, ultrasounds are reassuring.
But for others? They come with a racing heart, clenched jaw, and that familiar swirl of anxiety.

Whether it’s due to a previous loss, or a traumatic experience - scan anxiety is real. And it makes perfect sense.

✨ You’re not broken — your body might just be remembering.

Past experiences (even ones you thought you’d moved on from) can quietly shape how safe or unsafe you feel in

I am working on something special behind the scenes to help.

To validate. To support. To soothe.

In the meantime, check in with yourself.
Where do you sit on the “How Am I Feeling?” scale today?
💛😟😱

(Turns out, cats are pretty good at modeling nervous system states.)

It’s okay to feel on edge. You don’t have to go through it alone 🩷