The Gentle Counsellor

05/12/2025

Time Outs may not be working the way we think they are.

When your child is having a meltdown, their brain is only focused on finding safety - not learning lessons. They can't access wisdom or logic in those big emotional moments because that part of their brain simply isn't developed yet.

Here's what we're learning: children don't learn to self-soothe alone. They learn to regulate WITH you, through your calm presence and connection.

We call this "Time In," a relationship-based approach that builds security while still providing structure.

Read the full blog to discover this brain-based alternative: https://zurl.co/rsM4E

17/11/2025

Sending much compassion to those who know this pain. 💔💔
New retreat details @ linktr.ee/natepost
I’m glad you’re here! 🫶✨💞

13/11/2025

😂

09/11/2025

28/10/2025

Lean how secure attachment develops with responsive presence and reflection, not perfect technique.

23/10/2025

Every single thing…..

New episode of “A Little Less Lonely” is up! Check linktr.ee/natepost for links….

I’m so glad you’re here! 🫶💞✨

08/10/2025

Every 👏 day 👏

The good days.
The hard days.
The days of smiles.
The days of tears.

When you have both everything AND nothing left to give, remember that what they need is for YOU to love them.

Love your child at every age, whether they are 2 or 15 or 37 or 55!

You don’t age out of parenthood.

16/09/2025

🥴

11/09/2025

Here is how you can help create safe environments...
🏡 At Home: build connections, encourage open communication, teach body safety and consent, use respectful discipline, celebrate individuality.
🎒 At School or Childcare: promote kindness and inclusion, have clear safety policies, provide trusted adults, listen to concerns, create a sense of belonging.
🤝 In the Community: be a protective bystander, support youth programs, speak up about unsafe behaviour, model respect and boundaries.

🌍 Globally: Currently there are real, urgent threats that children face worldwide, including violence, conflict, and unsafe environments created by adults.
- Gun violence (school shootings in the US)
- Genocides and War (Palestine, Congo, Sudan)
- Unequal enforcement of child protection laws and rights
- International agreements like the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC) aim to protect children, but not all governments uphold these equally

💛 What are some of your favourite children's books that speak on bigger topics? One of ours is 'Finding Our Heart: A Story about the Uluru Statement for Young Australians' by Thomas Mayo, illustrated by Blak Douglas.

At The Gentle Counsellor, I work with parents and families from a trauma-informed perspective, supporting them to break cycles, strengthen relationships, and create safety at home. My children’s books — Tricky People and the My Body series — are gentle, practical tools to start conversations about body safety, consent, and tricky situations. 📚

10/09/2025

💛 Keep Children Safe with 10 Practical Steps

1 Teach Body Autonomy – Children have the right to say “no” to unwanted touch. Model consent and praise boundary-setting.

2 Talk About Tricky People – Unsafe people aren’t always strangers. Teach children to trust instincts and talk to safe adults.

3 Make Conversations Normal – Ask open-ended questions, validate feelings, and check in regularly.

4 Address Online Safety Early – Keep devices in shared spaces, discuss privacy, and monitor online risks.

5 Build Emotional Literacy & Safety Skills – Help children identify and express feelings, solve problems, and recognise safe vs unsafe situations.

6 Establish Trusted Support Systems – Ensure children know multiple safe adults and create family safety plans.

7 Model Respectful Relationships – Demonstrate kindness, respect, and healthy boundaries in your own interactions.

8 Empower Children to Speak Up – Reinforce that their voice matters, validate their courage, and teach it’s ok to ask for help.

9 Engage in Global Awareness & Activism – Teach empathy for children worldwide. Discuss conflicts, war, or crises age-appropriately, and model ways to support humanitarian efforts.

10 Understand and Influence Systems – Stay informed about child protection laws and policies, advocate for safer systems, and teach older children the importance of civic engagement.

Children thrive when they feel safe, respected, and protected at home, at school, in the community, and globally.

At The Gentle Counsellor, I support families with trauma-informed counselling and offer resources like my children's books Tricky People and the My Body series, which are great tools to start conversations about body safety, consent, and tricky situations.

09/09/2025

Today is World Su***de Prevention Day.

It’s a day to honour the memories of those we’ve lost to su***de and to offer support to those facing difficult times and those living with the grief of losing someone.

The message of ‘Changing the Narrative on Su***de’ encourages us to change how we talk about su***de. To replace silence and stigma for empathy, compassion and action.

We all have a role to play in staying connected, showing up for those we care about and helping those struggling access the support they need.

Show the people around you that you’re there for them by asking 'are you OK?'. Because a conversation could change a life.

***dePreventionDay

09/09/2025

Children don’t always tell us with their words when something is wrong, but often their behaviour and feelings give us important clues.

That’s why part of child protection being everyone’s business is learning how to notice the signs that a child may be struggling or unsafe and what to do next.

Some signs can include:
⚠️ Sudden mood changes (withdrawn, fearful, anxious)
⚠️ Avoiding certain people or places
⚠️ Unexplained injuries or frequent 'accidents'
⚠️ Trouble sleeping or frequent nightmares
⚠️ Regression (clinginess, bedwetting, baby talk)
⚠️ Talking about secrets or being told to 'keep quiet'

If you notice these signs:
✔️ Stay calm and open
✔️ Listen and believe the child
✔️ Offer reassurance (“I believe you, it’s not your fault”)
✔️ Don’t promise secrecy
✔️ Document what you’ve noticed
✔️ Seek guidance from a professional or report if needed to your local authorities or emergency line

Every adult has a role in protecting children (parents, teachers, neighbours, coaches, health professionals, family, friends). By noticing, listening, and acting, you may be the safe adult a child desperately needs 💛

At The Gentle Counsellor, I support parents with trauma-informed counselling and tools to strengthen safe, secure relationships with their children. My children’s books Tricky People and the My Body series are also great resources to start conversations about body safety, consent, and difficult situations.

✨ How are YOU creating an environment where every child is safe, heard, and protected?