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Kristie Hill • Mind Body Therapy

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Surfers Paradise, QLD
Kristie Hill • Mind Body Therapy

Gold Coast based with a holistic approach to mind and body.

It's more than moving away from illness, it's moving towards wellness!
- Talk therapy
- Biofeedback & emotional clearing
- Massage & cupping
- BPsychSc, DipRemMass

03/11/2022

When life feels overwhelming we can be tempted to bury our emotions. We deny feeling them, avoid expressing them, and try to pretend it’s not happening.

Here’s the thing though: what we RESIST will eventually TAKE OVER.

If we ignore and repress our feelings they will become too big to contain, and spill out in unwanted and unexpected ways. This often leaves us more emotionally vulnerable than before, with a heck of repairing to do!

It is easier to say than do, for sure, but it is VITAL that you embrace your emotions. That doesn’t mean to let them run your life, but it does mean you need to acknowledge WHAT they are and WHY they are present. Feel in order to heal, friends. Don’t let your resistance cause you to lose control.

01/11/2022

The biggest indicator of what it might be like to be in relationship with someone is to consider not how well they show you love, but how they love THEMSELVES.

Are they gracious with their shortcomings?
Are they aware of their needs?
Do they establish and maintain healthy boundaries?
Do they aim for improvement over perfection?
Do they abandon their dreams in times of frustration?

We can only truly accept and love another when we are willing to be loved and accepted as we are - and that starts with loving ourselves.

30/10/2022

If you’ve been feeling a little lost in the muck lately, then this post is for you. A small challenge for the week with one straightforward task each day to see if your mental state improves!

Save this post to refer to later, and comment below if you’re going to play along ❤️

29/10/2022

Have you ever been a situation where someone asked something of you, and you really want to say no but you feel like you need to give a tonne of reasons why?

In most cases, people overexplain when they are attempting to justify their needs. Whether it’s your boss asking you to stay back half an hour, or your family asking for money, or a friend asking for help moving house: if your answer is a no that is okay - you don’t need to make up reasons like ‘I am just super busy, I have an appointment in an hour, but I really wish I could’… You are entitled to prioritize your personal needs and no one else even needs to know what they are.

If you overexplain a lot then try this. Next time you want to say no, say it and STOP. Just no. NO. That’s a whole sentence.

Do you overexplain a lot? Is your ‘No’ hard for you to communicate? Let me know in the comments! x

27/10/2022

If someone makes a commitment to an act or boundary but breaks it, accountability is the FIRST step forward for all parties.

No one has ever truly been sorry if they didn’t take accountability first.

Accountability and punishment are different things, however. The former means being accepting of the consequences one’s actions. The latter is purposefully applying pain or suffering as retribution. Accountability gives space for repair while punishment causes more damage.

Next time you are hard done by consider if you are holding the offender accountable, or if you are trying to punish them. Do these things feel different or the same to you?

26/10/2022

There is a notion that living a balanced life means achieving optimal health in all zones - relationships, career, fitness, etc.

Personally, I think that’s a load of b***sh*t. It’s unrealistic and puts pressure on people to do ALL OF THE THINGS all of the time.

Instead I invite you to shift your idea of ‘balance’. I invite you to see it as the FULL RANGE of the human experience. That means embracing the emotions and journeys that come from the highest highs and the lowest lows.

Life isn’t a pie chart of all the things you’re supposed to be feeling good about all the time. It’s a line - a spectrum of emotions, a range of challenges and adventures, that when met with openness become the rich tapestry of the life we have woven. Colour your life from the whole rainbow, loves.

24/10/2022

If you focus too long on the things beyond your control you’ll end up caged inside of them, seeing only bars and hurdles in your way.

Instead, let go of what you can’t control. Focus on what you can. Even if you think there is nothing you can do I GUARANTEE you have at least one choice - your attitude towards it.

Don’t be caged, little doves. You deserve to fly.

20/10/2022

The ENTIRE point of entering any kind of therapy, personal development, or spiritual growth work is to become a more harmonious version of yourself. To return to the authentic you, a clearer and more evolved you.

When we do that we live in more love, peace, and happiness. That makes life more enjoyable, and isn’t that what it’s all about? To embrace our time here and flourish?

So don’t feel bad if you aren’t in constant courses, doing ice baths everyday, doing breathwork and journaling morning and night. In fact, I recommend you don’t take that course of action! You deserve to savour how much you’ve already grown. This can be your time to stop DOING and just BE.

19/10/2022

Imagine this: A friend said they were going to pick you up and take you for a coffee, but when the day came they didn’t show up.

What are the first explanations your mind throws out?
Is it that they forgot about you because you’re unimportant?
Is it that they had something better to do and don’t like you?
Or is it that they had a family emergency, got the day wrong, or their car broke down?

Trauma shapes the way we look at the world and ourselves. But as Gabor Mate says, it is not the situation we are really reacting to in these scenarios - it is our PERCEPTION of it.

17/10/2022

It takes courage to express and uphold our boundaries in the beginning, and with practice it becomes second nature. However it also takes practice to be accepting when the person you’re expressing your boundary to ISN’T MEETING YOU IN IT.

Maybe your need conflicts with theirs, maybe they are unwilling, or perhaps they are incapable. No matter their reason, it is their prerogative to say no, and it is your prerogative to step away.

15/10/2022

In the journey to being self aware, the first step is to pay attention to your thoughts, choices, behaviours and feelings as if you were watching a character from TV. Observe and witness from the outside. Be curious and free of judgement. You might be surprised at the clarity you get from taking a step backwards ❤️

13/10/2022

We all need to get in touch with what our needs truly are, and be able to express those to the loved ones in our life.

You wouldn’t expect a waiter to bring you cake you didn’t order, would you?

If we don’t express our needs then we can’t expect other people to uphold them!

11/10/2022

If anyone tells you boundaries should be easy, they’re lying. They can be really hard work! For people who aren’t used to setting or enforcing boundaries it can be extremely confronting. If you push too hard are you being too rigid, and if you let something slide are you letting yourself down?

Neither.

Just remember what boundaries do - they help us show others how to best be in relationship with us. They are signposts that show what we value, what hurts us, and what will help the dynamic thrive. Sometimes our values and needs change - and that means our boundaries might too.

You get to choose when to be flexible or rigid. You know whether a boundary is a hard line or a best approach. And you know, in your body, how you feel about having it pushed.

Be gentle while you learn about your boundaries and practice holding them ❤️

28/09/2022

The way our past experiences have shaped us isn’t always clearly defined and wrapped in a neat labeled box. In fact, most people are unaware of the full extent of their trauma on current functioning! That’s why there is therapy.

But the way others perceive us can sometimes help us identify patterns, triggers, and opportunities for growth.

Have you ever been called…
Dramatic? That might be a fight response.
Lazy? Maybe that’s your freeze response.
Negative? Perhaps you default to ‘flight’ in times of trauma.
A Pushover? Maybe that’s your dawn response.

While this may not be applicable to all situations or all individuals, it does get us to stop and think - am I really what they say? What could be behind it?

If it uncovers some opportunity for you to grow, then book to see me. I can help support you through the process. Remember - therapy isn’t just for bad times! It’s for support during personal development too!

27/09/2022

Some people think we have an ‘inner child’, but I subscribe more to the notion of ‘multiplicity of the mind’. This is the idea that we have multiple versions of our selves in different ages and situations that form our psyche. Lots of these are strong and protective, but some aren’t.

One of the common vulnerable forms can be the child, and often stuck at the age of a significant trauma. Whether it was a conscious event or not, when we encounter an emotional challenge as a child it can result in us missing (or not successfully progressing through) a stage of development.

Until that stage is revisited and processed sufficiently, we will often return to those childhood triggers/feelings/behaviours when challenged.

25/09/2022

Yes, you. The one who says they’re getting an early night but scrolls in bed for hours before drifting off. It’s time to go to sleep.

For those of us aged 18 to 64 years, it’s recommended we get 7-9hrs of shut-eye every night.

Most of us know why it’s good for us - so let me just focus on why it’s BAD if we don’t get enough. For every hour you miss, studies have shown:

💤 There is a 14% increase risk of unpleasant emotions that affect your day to day function
💤 There is a 38% increase in the chance of feeling hopeless and sad
💤 Thsre is a 23% increase in the chance of using to***co, ma*****na, or alcohol

So turn off the lights and get some sleep you beautiful, tired b***h.

23/09/2022

Trauma is not universal - rather than being defined by an event, trauma occurs based on our PERCEPTION of an event. That’s why two people can react to the same situation in completely different ways - based on their unique experiences and cognitive interpretation.

This means that the ways we display that trauma, or our outlets or responses, can vary between individuals too!

Do you resonate with any of those in this list?

22/09/2022

How beautiful is the feeling of connecting with someone new? When you’re starting to date, enjoying their company more and more, and riding all the feelings of a fresh relationship.

Have you ever thought ‘they just get me, it’s like we have known each other for years’ when starting out with someone new? Found out that you share similar heartbreaks, understand each other’s pain, and have overcome the same obstacles?

Many people take this as a sign of deep compatibility. And it can be! But warning: it can also be a sign of shared trauma.

So how do you know the difference?

Intimate connections bring all our ‘stuff’ to the surface. Wounds and triggers you are both aware and unaware of become visible when you’re in relation with another. So the biggest question is…

Is this relationship a place where you can be supported to heal your past wounds, or is it a dynamic where you’ll be retraumatised?

We can bond over shared trauma without being healthy partners for one another, and we can be understood and supported to heal by a partner who hasn’t experienced exactly what we have.

How does your relationship feel to you? Is it encouraging healthy growth or a trauma bond?

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