
05/08/2025
You say the spark is gone. She's distant, cold, not affectionate. But maybe it's not about desire—it's about emotional safety.
You wonder why she pulls away when you reach for her. Why conversations feel like walking on eggshells. Why the woman who used to light up when you walked in the room now barely looks up from her phone.
Here's what I've learned after 15 years of counselling couples: her body remembers every dismissive comment, every time her feelings were minimised, every moment she felt unseen. And when emotional safety is broken, physical intimacy becomes impossible.
Emotional safety isn't built in the bedroom. It's built in the kitchen, in conflict, in stressful moments. If she feels criticised, dismissed, or alone, her body doesn't crave closeness—it braces for distance.
She's not withholding affection to punish you. She's protecting herself from feeling vulnerable with someone who doesn't feel safe.
Want the spark back? Reignite emotional safety first: ✨ Listen without fixing. ✨ Validate instead of debating. ✨ Hold her before you reach for her.
The intimacy you're craving isn't gone forever—it's just waiting for her to feel safe enough to let you back in. And that safety? It starts with how you show up in the small, everyday moments.
Are you ready to rebuild that foundation? 💙
When she feels emotionally seen and safe, the physical connection follows.
✨ If this hits home and you don’t know where to start, I’ve got you.
Click the link in my bio to get real, practical support through online marriage counselling.
You don’t have to lose her. You just have to learn how to reach her again. 💛