28/10/2025
Epic distinction.
🐎 Day 2 – From Science to Soul – Day 2: Safe From Us, Safe With Us
When Warwick Schiller said there are two kinds of safety — safe from us and safe with us — it stopped me in my tracks.
For years, my training has centered on ensuring that horses understand exactly what’s being asked. Clear cues, predictable consequences, calm repetition. That creates a horse who feels safe from me — I’m consistent, I’m fair, and I don’t surprise them.
But “safe with me”? That’s another layer entirely.
A horse who feels safe with you seeks your presence when uncertain. They regulate by proximity, just as foals do with their dam or humans do with trusted figures. That’s attachment theory in action — translated through a prey animal’s nervous system.
This is where my work with Dr Nima Rahmany meets Warwick’s teachings. When we become a ventral tether — a grounded, co-regulating presence — we stop being just the signal-giver and start being the safe place.
In groundwork now, I notice subtle differences:
If the horse drifts away, I don’t immediately call him back. I check: did I feel safe enough for him to stay?
When he comes toward me, I don’t fuss or correct — I just allow. That moment of shared stillness builds trust faster than any yield exercise.
I’m learning to read when a horse is “safe from me” but still scanning the horizon, versus when he’s “safe with me” and his entire body softens.
It’s a small distinction with huge consequences. Because when safety comes through us instead of despite us, learning becomes effortless.
Tomorrow: Day 3 – Doing Nothing is an Action – The Power of Co-Regulation.
