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Finding Truth, Kenmore (2026)

19/04/2026

This was the absolute truth for our marriage.

I was living in hurt, resentment and judgement towards my husband, nagging and criticising. I was treating the man I loved as though he was a joke and couldn't do anything right.
I was even speaking that to others around me, fueling the bitterness.

But GOD!!

He transformed me in so many ways.
He pointed the light on my darkness, my rebellion, my stubbornness, my unforgiveness.
He lead me down a path where I wanted to know the truth of who He is, what He designed marriage to be, what it meant to be a woman of God and a wife.

He broke down my walls.
He shined the light on the truth of who I had become, but showed me who I was meant to be.

As I submitted to Him, my heart craved to be the person He wanted me to be.
He showed me the design and purpose of marriage.
He showed me my role - which is totally counter cultural.
He showed me how I had missed the mark in so many areas of my life and marriage.
He showed me what life could be.

He comforted me as I unraveled lies and behaviours that had ruled my life. It was vulnerable and challenging.

Amidst all that, He answered a prayer that I hadn't even prayed because I didn't think it was possible.

He healed my marriage.

He showed me what submitting to His purpose and design in life produces.
He showed me the rewards of learning to submit biblically to my husband.
He gave me freedom from persuing what the world says is important and in turn gave me a contentment and peace I have never experienced before.

He answered a prayer from the depths of my soul that I wasn't actually praying, because I didn't see it as possible, to heal my marriage.

Please understand that nothing is perfect and I still struggle with many things.
I am human.
I still doubt love and acceptance of others at times and behave in ways I regret.

But God in His unbelievable mercy and grace continues to forgive and reward me in ways I never thought possible.
He is stripping away the old heart of stone and replacing it with a heart of flesh.

God is so SO good.
And He is the answer to ALL our problems.
Be brave and curious enough to seek Him out. It may not only bring you transformation in this life, but will give you such a secure peace and hope for the next life that the things of this world will start to fade away.

Ask God to show you the truth of who He is and also the truth of who you are in Him and allow Him permission to change you. Then watch your world transform!

30/10/2025

I remember very well the moment God made me aware of these verses in the bible. It was in 2020 and it shook me to my core. I had read/heard them many times before, but they were not directed at me, they were for everyone else. But this time I was made very aware of these verses and it was like He was giving me a look at my future and an opportunity to do something about it.

Living as a "Christian" for most of my life, or more to the point knowing how to look like a Christian for most of my life, this warning was a wake up call that sent me on such a transformational journey that shook me and woke me up from my complacency.
I will be forever grateful that God sent His Holy Spirit to nudge and challenge me on this because as I have truly sought out what it is to "know" God and to be "known" by Him, the desires of my heart and answers to prayers have come. Many I didn't even know were desires or prayers that could be answered.
My life has shifted in many ways that I didn't expect and some I can't even put into words. But I can tell you that my foundation has changed and the storms I have faced have shown me that what I have now is nothing like anything I have ever had through my life as a "Christian".

I would highly recommend every Christian listen to these 2 sermons on this topic. They are challenging and very helpful in understanding what this warning is about. It may also help uncover a fasle conversion in your faith like I have had.
My past, prideful self would have ignored this recommendation as I was "fine" and this wasn't necessary for me. I pray that anyone that sees this post will listen to promptings from the Holy Spirit and be brave enough to consider that maybe the conversion you have experienced is not a true conversion and this warning from Christ may be what you face on judgement day. What a terrifying thought.

We are called to work out our salvation with fear and trembling - make sure you understand what true salvation is while there is still time!

Saved or Self-Deceived - Part 1
https://spotify.link/RK8NgLcCSXb

Saved or Self-Deceived - Part 2
https://spotify.link/gacUFxhDSXb

Please feel free to reach out if you would like to chat about anything. You are not alone.

17/02/2025

This is an short section from a sermon by Voddie Baucham on brokeness that I have listened to many times. One of the best sermons ever.

In this section he takes down the "sissified" version of Jesus and replaces it with the Jesus who is coming on a white horse. THAT'S the Jesus I serve and worship now! I am guilty of embracing the sissified one previously. I know so much more about him now - he is a mighty, powerful, righteous, incredible and loving God.

https://youtu.be/I_SBimXSqP0?si=v9HyifAxf-PvBaay

I HIGHLY recommend listening to this whole sermon here: https://youtu.be/GVow8rSQwiA?si=gFVKaWriWIu2fkgF

It is worth listening to many times!

30/01/2025

I wanted to share something God has been revealing to me.

What is Eternal Life -
John 17:3
(Jesus praying) And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.

Matthew 7:21-23
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’

If I had been asked a few years ago what is eternal life, I would have said it is living forever - in heaven, with God. Eternal life is much more than a life of infinite length. It is a superior quality of life, marked by unbroken fellowship with God. This is one of God's great purposes for reconciling us to him through Jesus.

Eternal life is a deep knowledge of God, an intimate relationship that goes both ways. He wants us to know him and he wants to know us. Intimacy with him is demonstrated by the intimacy of a married couple making love, in the way God intended, not how the world says it should be. Too often Christians have a distorted view of s*x, having been more influenced by the world than by the Scriptures. In some circles, the topic of s*x is taboo and needs to remain behind closed doors - however we forget that the Bible is not silent about it.

To be naked, unashamed and knowing someone more intimately than anyone else, you can't hide anything and you are completely vulnerable and needing to trust each other.
What God desires is that we move beyond "head knowledge" into the most intimate relationship with him, similar to the husband/wife relationship. That’s why in the bible ‘knew’ equals to ‘made love to’.

The world has distorted the idea of what making love means and if you don't truly understand it, or have never experienced it yourself the way God intended, your view of this kind of intimate act has lost its true meaning. I know this as the majority of our married life was scarred by a distorted view of intimacy between a husband and wife and we both spent many years hurting.

After Brad's accident in September, God transformed both of us and miraculously transformed our relationship with each other. This included physical intimacy, healing years of hurt, pain and resentment.

As our individual relationships with God have grown, the deeper meaning of making love and how it corresponds to how our relationship with God is supposed to look has been incredible. We now know each other in ways that we have never experienced before, a depth and intimacy that is deeper than the physical. Please do not read that as it is perfect - God is still working in us and teaching us things as we walk this new path with him.

The relationship between Christ and the Church is referred to many times in the bible as that of a husband and wife - well how that relationship was designed to be by God, not the world's view of it which broken.

Ephesians 5:31-32
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.

How do we know God? Through his word and spending time reading, studying, meditating on and talking about it. Growing in understanding of who God is, his promises and his history of keeping them. His nature, his attributes, his heart. It is so much more than the "God Loves You, so you are all good" that is professed in many churches. I lived many years in that superficial world and always wondered at the lack of transformation in my life.

As I read more of the bible and really think and ponder what is being said not just reading it so I can tick a box, I have a deeper knowledge and understanding and trust in God. I find myself talking to him throughout the day regularly. As I dig deeper, my desire to know him more grows. It's like a beautiful outpouring from him, the more we earnestly seek him and understanding the more he gives and the more we want. He promised that we will find him if we seek him with all our hearts.

Hosea 6:3
Let us know; let us press on to know the LORD; his going out is sure as the dawn; he will come to us as the showers, as the spring rains that water the earth.
*Press on - follow after, pursue, chase, run after

Galatians 4:8-9
Formerly, when you did not know God, you were enslaved to those that by nature are not gods. But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how can you turn back again to the weak and worthless elementary principles of the world, whose slaves you want to be once more?

Jeremiah 9:23 -24
Thus says the Lord: “Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the Lord.”

When you "know" God intimately, which is what he wants, you have a taste of eternal life here on earth. I knew about him and knew of him, but I didn't "know" him. Each day he is growing my knowledge and intimacy with him. You can know him too - he is calling you to him. "Press on" to seek him and you will find him.

28/09/2024

Do you believe in Miracles?

I do and I believe in a God who continues to show me His awesome love, power and provision.

I recently share that Brad had a mountain bike accident and broke his jaw. I shared how during his surgery I spent hours listening to worship music, praising God and handing Brad over to God. Trusting that whatever the outcome, God is good and will provide. I didn't know if I would have a husband, or if there would be complications from the surgery or accident - it was a total unknown. Yet I continued to praise God with intense passion and trust.

God has been working in me and changing my heart over the last few years, but even more so in the last few months.
A few days after Brad was home from surgery, I felt God prompting me to repent to him and to Brad for how I have treated Brad over the course of our marriage.
To name just a few things, I have been selfish, self reliant, resentful, bitter, demanding, hurtful and closed off to him at times through our 25+ years of marriage. God has been shining a light into this darkness and calling me to be obedient to a life that God requires.

The last year has been filled with learning more about God, his love, his righteousness, his mercy, his provision, his requirements and his sacrifice. I have also learned how much he has done for me, even though I do not deserve it. He has shown me what real love is and in the process he has transformed my heart and I see my husband in a whole new way - I see him through Jesus' eyes.

I apologised to Brad for sinning against him and also God with how I have treated him during our marriage. Almost immediately, walls started breaking down as we shared about hurts that we have been carrying against each other for over 20 years. It is like a floodgate of emotions and hurt has been released.

Brad and my connection, interactions, intimacy and communication has been incredible during this time of what the world would see as a terrible experience of him breaking his jaw.

God has totally transformed our marriage.

We are both very aware how this is 100% God's hand and blessing in response to repentance. I don't know if it would have happened without this accident as so many things have "coincidentally" fallen into place to lead to this transformation and being able to spend time together.

The other day I sat outside on my own just in disbelief that this is where we are and so incredibly grateful to God. It truly is a miracle. He answered prayers I never imagined would be answered, that I hadn't even prayed for. I had given up.

Brad is still in pain and it is hard for him and for me to see him this way. But during his down time and pain, we have spoken a lot about God transforming me and we have been open about bitterness we have both held onto over the years. Everything has changed almost in an instant.

I gave Brad to God while he was in surgery, in an honest heartfelt release and knew that whatever the outcome it would be good. I never even imagined this was what I would receive in return.

God is Good ALL THE TIME!

23/09/2024

God is Good.

Last weekend Brad had an accident while riding his mountain bike and his chin took the brunt of the impact. He managed to fracture his jaw in 2 places and also his wrist.
He was in hospital overnight and went into surgery this Monday afternoon. Thankfully he came out of surgery and it seems it has gone well. He has plates and screws in his mouth to help keep his jaw in place while it heals, which is at least 6 weeks til he can try chewing food.

Why is God Good?
Previous Reeda would have said that everything was ok and that she trusted God in the situation. All the while internally stressing and wearing out adrenal glands.
Over the past few years God has been working in me and during this time he has given me a huge revelation of his transforming work in my life. I have had a peace through this that I have never felt in my whole life. Even Brad mentioned that he was worried how I would react to everything.

I have grown so much, learned so much and have a deeper revelation of all that God has done for me that it has truly changed my life. I apologise for anyone who I told that I was a Christian before, because I was not living a life that showed what he can do. I was a hypocrite and why would anyone want what I had as it was nothing different to their lives - just less fun, or so it seemed.

I have spent a lot of time in tears of gratitude of his transforming me. I knew that there were huge risks involved with Brad needing surgery and there still is a long road to travel for healing, but not once did I fall into despair, worry or fear.
While he was in surgery I spent a beautiful few hours in praise, worship and prayer to God. Thanking him and praising him for who he is. I prayed for my husband during that time without knowing what the outcome would be and I thanked him for this situation - because I know, that I know, that I know, that God is good, all the time. And he works ALL things for the good of those who love him.

Brad's accident could have ended with a much worse outcome, so I am incredibly grateful that he has only these injuries. I am grateful that we went to the hospital straight away and the major injuries were discovered quickly. I am grateful that God is working in Brad too. I am grateful for the hindsight that will come and show how this was all part of something bigger than we can see now.

I am grateful that I still have my husband and I get to love him with Jesus' love as I help to nurse him through his recovery. I am grateful that I can lead by example for my kids, so they can see God's transformation in my life when bad things happen.

14 or so years ago my response to this would have been very different and I would have said that I was ok and I trusted God - I would have been lying. I would have been a nervous wreck and rocking on the kitchen floor in tears. I wish I could go back in time to that woman and tell her the truth of what it really means to trust in God. But I also don't want to as I wouldn't change those dark dark years as it was part of my journey into a true conversion with God that has been life changing.

God is good all the time, and all the time God is good!

27/08/2024

Have you ever been hurt by others? Felt like you don’t fit in? That you aren’t wanted? That you aren’t accepted for who you are? Felt Abandoned?

When I was about 8, my parents went on an overseas trip and made plans for me to stay with their friends while they were away. My older sisters stayed at home during this trip while I stayed at my parent’s friends house, who I didn't really know that well. I felt uncomfortable, awkward and lonely.

I didn't understand why I wasn't going with my parents or allowed to stay with my sisters at home and this confusion lead to me creating a belief about myself. This belief wasn't truth, but was based on my perception and understanding of the situation.

I was abandoned, I wasn't wanted, wasn't a part of the family, no one wanted to be around me, I wasn't good enough and everyone would eventually leave me and I wouldn't really understand why.

Although this belief wasn't based on truth, it became my truth. I started to experience things in life that I perceived to be affirming my belief. I withdrew and started to protect myself, often self sabotaging relationships and experiences and creating more "truth" to my belief.

It became so ingrained in me that it affected all parts of my life over the last 30+ years.
Family, marriage and parenting relationships, friendships, church and work relationships and my relationship with God. My relationship with God was to be one of the biggest truths to untangle and today God provided me with an amazing moment of realisation.

I was doing my bible study on understanding the Gospel (the good news) this morning.
One section mentioned that the sacrifice of Christ was not limited to the Jews, but also includes a people from every tribe and tongue and people and nation (Revelation 5:9).

God showed me times I have not felt like I belong or been able to do anything to fit in. With an overwhelming sense of knowing, He made me very aware that He is different. His salvation could have just been for the Jews and those who are descendants of a chosen bloodline – but He sent Jesus to do what was not expected. He came to save everyone. He was abandoned, despised, rejected. In darkness He died and carried the shame and guilt of everyone. The ones who don’t fit in, the ones who feel abandoned and hurt and feel like they can never do enough to fit into this world.

God knows He needs to whisper to me the truths that have always been there, but hidden by a lens of abandonment and fear and anticipation of rejection. He knows there are years worth of experiences and layers of perceived hurt that have needed to heal.

God showed me in that moment that I didn’t need to crave acceptance from humans or worldly pleasures and accolades.
Jesus' sacrifice, His painful death and shedding His innocent blood has paid the price that brings me into His family. I did nothing but He chose to die for me. I did not deserve it, but He said I was worth it. God is shining a light on the darkness and lies. He is showing how past experiences and beliefs have all been wrapped up in a lie designed to limit and distract me from the truth.

I am a child of the God who created the universe, and I belong. I've been born again, into His family. His blood flows through my veins. I have come home into His loving arms. I choose Him and am truly grateful beyond anything I have ever felt before.

16/04/2024

These are not my Friends, no matter what close to 30 years of thinking they are would have me believe.

Back in my teens, I started watching Friends when it first came out. I watched it every week and still remember times when it came on during dinner and I would leave the table to sit and watch it.
Over the years I have watched the full series many times and can speak the lines along to many parts of it. I have laughed and cried with the 6 characters and felt as though I knew them – and the actors, intimately. They literally felt like my “friends”. I became comfortable with the humiliation, crude and degrading remarks, cheating, womanising, homos*xual relationships, s*x outside marriage and so much more, and I loved it all. Even though deep down I knew “some” parts were not ok – I still watched it.

I remember not understanding how Christians could be watching some very popular series’. Ones full of murder, s*x, cheating, swearing etc. Sadly I was sitting in judgement with a massive plank in my eye. It is very humbling later when I realised the error of my ways.

I remember vividly the moment when God woke me up to what I was filling my mind with. Romans 12:2 says: Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

I had been binge watching Friends during covid. I got to the end of the series, again. We had been spending so much time at home, I didn’t know what else to do with my time so I just decided to start from the beginning of the series again.

I started watching the first episode and it was like the scales fell from my eyes. I saw what I had been accepting and honouring and filling my mind with. Everything about the show glorified things that dishonour God. And I knew the whole series well, many scenes word for word. I knew it intimately, yet did not have the same intimate knowledge of God and the bible.
It takes nearly 87 hours to watch the whole Friends series without breaks and I had not only watched the full series many times, I had rewatched many, many episodes outside that. Yet I struggled to find time and motivation to read my bible and pray… I was now fully aware of what my mind was taking in and it certainly wasn’t being renewed.

I stopped immediately and couldn’t watch anymore. I felt truly convicted and ashamed that this was what I was doing. This conviction also led me to an awareness of what I and our family was watching and listening to.
I became aware of other movies and shows that I LOVED which were not honouring God. I destroyed my copies of Dirty Dancing – something I also knew very well from a young age, Chicago and Moulin Rouge. I removed the songs that I would enthusiastically belt out loudly from my playlist. I became a lot more intentional with what I was allowing into my mind.

However last year when Matthew Perry died and I read some articles about him, my newsfeed started to be filled with different Friends related pages. I started to see behind the scenes videos and short clips every day, and I was dragged in. My conscience was warning me but I was comfortable again, my friends were back. It wasn’t bad though as I wasn’t watching the show…. Until I realised what was happening. I was cheating on God. That was how I felt. I had found a way around His guidance. I blocked all the pages that kept showing up. I was choosing to honour Him and I wasn’t going to let satan distract me.

I have known for a while that I needed to destroy my complete set of Friends DVDs. I actually tried selling them at one stage, but then felt guilty about the fact I would be allowing something I didn’t agree with into someone else’s home. They have been sitting on a shelf collecting dust.

Today was the day and I do this to honour God in obedience. I share it because I know that there are others who will be watching and listening to things that may need to stop. I ask that you pray for the Holy Spirit to show you where you are allowing content that dishonours God into your life. It may not be Friends, but there are movies, TV series, songs, books etc – pray that He will show you and that you will be brave and obedient to be able to follow His promptings. Then replace those things with God honouring options instead!

07/04/2024

I am grateful for covid… I never thought I would say that, however there have been a number of things that have come through the struggle and trauma around that time that I will be eternally grateful for.

Many churches were not meeting during this time (this is one thing I will never understand or agree with!) and we ended up hosting a home church.
This was a major turning point for me in my faith as we started listening to preachers I hadn’t really heard of before each week in our home church. These were unlike any preachers I remembered hearing through my life. They were to the point, not holding back and I was uncomfortable, but I needed it. I was becoming convicted about my relationship with God in a way I never had before.

Over and over God was reminding me of Matthew 7:21-23
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’

I became hungry to hear more and learn more. I started listening to sermons daily, sometimes multiple times a day. I found preachers who were not afraid of people being uncomfortable with their messages and they were instrumental in me learning about God in a way I had never experienced.

I was getting hit over the head constantly with truths I had never heard or considered before. I started to question what my faith was based on and I was concerned that I was going to be one of those who God turns away. I was convicted about my life in so many areas and the fruit it was producing – or not producing. I was not being transformed into a new being, I was living my life in step with the world. I was comfortably living the life as a “good” person, following the rules of what I thought was expected of a Christian.

These preachers spoke the word of God to me in such a way that it stirred my soul. I have learned more about the bible and what Jesus has done for me and God’s love for me in the last 4 years through these men, than I have in my whole life. As I look back at my 35ish years as a Christian, I realise that majority of what I was hearing was pretty comfortable. I would occasionally become convicted over something and promise to make changes – but they never stuck. Why? Because I never understood the gospel of what Jesus death truly meant and the gift He gave me, even though I knew the story since I was a young child.

The most amazing sermons I have found have been “random” (I don’t believe in random!) sermons that would show up in my Youtube feed which is now pretty much full of these preachers and the occasional video about chickens, goats or food forests! It often blows my mind how I will “randomly” choose to listen to sermons that are about something I am reading in the bible, or a topic that I want to know more about – but haven’t spoken about or searched for. God continues to provide in ways I never imagine or expect.

One thing I want to make REALLY clear, I am in no way perfect. I still struggle at times to read my bible and I stray into areas I have had issues before. It can feel like a bit of a wilderness at times – but I come back. Its different as it feels like the Holy Spirit prompting/reminding me to focus on what is important. I don’t want anyone to compare to an image that may come from what I share or what you think my life may look like – social media is so bad at doing this. Please understand anything I share is lead from what I feel God is prompting me to share and all glory is to and for Him.

If you are searching for more depth in spiritual teaching I can recommend the following preachers. I often listen to them on Youtube but have also found their sermons on Spotify.

Paul Washer
Voddie Baucham
John MacArthur
Steve Lawson
RC Sproul
Jeff Durbin

Ask God for his guidance, wisdom & discernment as you listen to their preaching.

My prayer is for those who are curious or hungry to learn more about God that you will be like Paul in 1 Corinthians 2:2 “For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified.”

19/03/2024

A few years ago, we met some new Christians (who have since become good friends) who came along to our home church that we were holding at the time.

I remember being faced with people new to their Christian faith who were hungry to learn more. They were asking questions, reading their bibles and making significant changes to their lives in response to their salvation. I was questioning why people new to the faith had a hunger and passion for God that I had never really encountered myself.

One day one of them mentioned they had been listening to the bible – I was like what? You can listen to the bible? I had never even considered that was possible or thought of it apart from listening to it read at church and small groups.

Well I started listening through the bible app and decided to listen to the whole bible. I have never done that or read it through before. It has been incredible for me as I have picked up things that I have never known, partly because hearing it is so different to reading. I am now interested in knowing and understanding more about biblical history - side note Israel follow the same pattern and it is frustrating, but it is the same for our world today.

I am currently listening to the Psalms and I came to Psalm 22... Now I had discovered that Psalm 22, written about 1000 years before Jesus was born, is a prophetic Psalm about Jesus' death. In the last few years the significance and impact of what Jesus has willingly done for me on the cross had overwhelmed and brought me to tears at times. I have always known about it, but the connection and depth of meaning of His death has magnified in an overwhelming way.

As I was listening, it was as though I was hearing Jesus speak. It really impacted me. His pain, His humiliation, His compassion, His love, His choice. The fact that David captured the crucifixion of Jesus in such accurate detail is astounding. And the Jews around Jesus when He cried out would have likely known He was quoting from Psalm 22 and they were now witnessing it play out in real life.

When we realise that all the prophecies in Psalm 22 have been fulfilled, in detail, in some cases to the very word and letter, the implications are difficult to deny. And this is just one of many prophecies that Jesus fulfilled during his time on earth.

Finding Truth

19/04/2026

30/10/2025

17/02/2025

30/01/2025

28/09/2024

23/09/2024

27/08/2024

16/04/2024

07/04/2024

19/03/2024

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