15/03/2026
I can do the sessions I do because of that girl in the first photo. This is the first time I have had a proper look at her, I instantly cried. She can't look at the camera, she is not who she was 48 hrs ago and she believes she never will be again. (Bloody Mum made me take that photo and now I can look at it, heal it, 20 years later)
14hr surgery at 23 years of age. Everything the surgeon tells you may happen...did, the worst being facial paralysis.
Now you have to realise facial paralysis just isn't how you now look. It's how you feel, you know what's it like when the dentist numbs your face, you know what it's like to try and turn your face into a downward sad face. It feels droopy, dribbly, sad and just not right and for me...that never goes away. It gets better and then I had to have a 2nd surgery. It gets better then I have to have radiation (which actually sorts the need for the surgeries out) and so my face just never returns to 'normal'. That girl who was, never is that girl again.
First photo Carrie, you are now on the roller-coaster that is life. You don't know how but step by step you live as you are. You break for other various reasons and the same reasons but you keep living and along the way you meet beautiful, kind souls that love you. You know darkness, you know light and you become the very thing you have dreamt about since you were a teenager.
Healing takes many many steps, it takes several healers and different modalities. It takes medical practitioners as well.
Mostly it took myself the courage to believe I was worthy of healing in the first place and that took time.
We ALL have scars, we have all had our moments of brokenness. Yes, mine are out there for the world to see on my face but we have to remember so many scars exist on the inside of everyone as well.
You may never return to the person you were before they f**kery but you can become so much more because of it.
No one is ever to much for me in session cause I can hold big big stuff and transmute it .... I did that for me on my own and with help ❤️ my soul guides make sure of it 🌼