Ali's Counselling Services

31/10/2025

This could not be more true about the person you chose to do your life with. The one that stands beside you, carries you, picks you up off the floor, cheers you on, and will to put themselves aside when you need them the most. ❤️

Love isn’t always the grand gestures, the flowers or the perfect date nights.

It’s who stands next to you when life falls apart…The person who helps you rebuild, not run away.

If you’ve got someone like that in your corner, tag them in the comments and let them know how grateful you are for them ❤️

✍️ IG: love.quotes

23/09/2025

I saw this in the shop and loved it

17/09/2025

🌿 The potential you see in others… isn’t really theirs.
It’s a reflection of what you would do in their place.

💡 This gentle reminder can help us:
✨ Accept people as they are
✨ Let go of frustration when they choose differently
✨ Recognise our own strengths we project onto others

Appreciate people for who they are today. 💚

12/08/2025

24/07/2025

Fight, Flight, or Fawn – What Does It Mean?

Ever heard of “fight or flight”? It’s part of our body’s natural stress response. When we feel unsafe—physically or emotionally—our brain quickly decides how to protect us.

Here’s what that can look like:

🧠 Fight – You get angry, argue, or feel the urge to defend yourself.
🏃‍♀️ Flight – You avoid, shut down, or want to run away from the situation.
🤝 Fawn – You people-please, say yes when you mean no, or try to keep others happy to avoid conflict.

We all react differently depending on our past experiences—especially if we’ve lived through trauma or high stress.

✨ Why does it happen?
It’s your nervous system trying to keep you safe. It’s not about weakness—it’s about survival.

🧘‍♀️ How does it affect us?
If we’re stuck in these patterns too often, it can lead to burnout, anxiety, or relationship issues.

🌱 The good news?
With support and awareness, you can learn to recognise your responses and gently start to heal.

You’re not broken. Your body is just trying to protect you the best way it knows how 💛

11/07/2025

Really useful information around staying calm when your child isn’t

27/06/2025

🌿 Recognising Abuse Isn’t Always Straightforward

Not all abusers fit the stereotype. Many people who cause harm in relationships—emotionally, physically, or psychologically—can appear kind, charming, and attentive to the outside world. This contrast can leave victims confused, doubting themselves, and feeling isolated.

Abuse doesn’t always show up in bruises. It can sound like constant criticism, feel like walking on eggshells, or look like manipulation disguised as love.

If something feels “off” in your relationship—even if you can’t explain it—it’s okay to trust that feeling. You are not alone, and support is available.

💬 If you or someone you know is navigating this kind of dynamic, gentle, confidential help is here when you’re ready.

— Ali’s Counselling Services

06/06/2025

It’s always so encouraging to receive messages from my clients after their sessions

31/05/2025

“Why do I feel like I don’t know what’s going on in my own body sometimes?”

Interoception is your brain’s ability to notice and make sense of what’s going on inside your body — things like hunger, needing the loo, feeling hot or cold, or even noticing your heart racing when you’re anxious. Basically, it’s your internal body awareness.

But for some people — especially those who are neurodivergent or who have experienced trauma — interoception can be really disrupted.

You might:
Not realise you’re hungry or full until it’s extreme

Miss early signs of needing a break or rest

Struggle to notice when you’re getting anxious or overwhelmed until you’re already in shutdown or meltdown

Find it hard to name emotions because you can’t feel what’s happening in your body clearly

This can lead to all sorts of challenges – from emotional dysregulation to difficulty communicating your needs, or feeling “disconnected” from your own body.

The good news? Interoception is something we can build awareness of, slowly and gently. Things like mindfulness, breath work, body scans, and therapeutic support can help you reconnect with those internal signals in a way that feels safe and manageable.

23/05/2025

When someone has an avoidant attachment style…

Had a chat with a client recently about their relationship, and something they said really stuck with me. They were trying to make sense of why their partner sometimes tells little lies in tricky conversations—especially when things feel a bit intense or emotionally loaded.

They said, “It’s like when they look at me, they’re not just seeing me. It’s like all the people from their childhood are standing behind me.”

That gave me chills. Because what they’re describing is a trauma response—rooted in early attachment wounds. For someone with an avoidant attachment style, vulnerability can feel like a trap. Being honest—especially if it might lead to conflict—can feel dangerous. So they avoid it, often without even realising they’re doing it.

When your nervous system has learned that love equals unpredictability or fear, self-protection becomes second nature. That might look like shutting down, avoiding emotional intimacy, or even stretching the truth to keep the peace.

Attachment styles aren’t life sentences—they’re patterns. And the beautiful thing is, with awareness and support, patterns can shift.

If this resonates with you (or someone you love), you’re not alone. It’s worth exploring with curiosity and compassion.